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I daydream so much that it affects every aspect of my life

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Faith103

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Mar 12, 2021
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I've always been that kid whos described to be "lost in her own world", but the past few months have been debilitating. I guess this all stemmed from the emotional neglect I've experienced in my childhood. While my parents were well off and provided me with a rather luxurious lifestyle, they were never there for me emotionally. We rarely spoke at length, hugged or even had much physical contact at all. They were simply unavailable, and we did speak it was often a condescending and humiliating experience for me.

I think I have been depressed for a very, very long time. I've spoken to a school counsellor when I younger and she suggested that I should see a therapist or doctor because she suspects that I'm battling depression. I never did see anyone, mostly because of how beaten down I was and how difficult it is for me speak about my experience. Over the years I became so good at putting on a fake smile that no one is even aware of my agony anymore.

Daydreaming had been my only escape from the turmoil within. Whenever things get bad I would spend hours on end engrossed in the alternative reality I've created in my head. The fantasy I've put together has become so intricate and complex that it would possibly rival some movies, and while I know that they aren't real, that was (and still is) my only source of relief. This has now become an addition of some sort, I literally spend so much time making up stories that I literally cancel meetup with friends, postpone work and skip meals. When I wake up in the morning I would spent at least an hour daydreaming before crawling out of bed, and when I go to bed at night I will daydream for as long as I can before sleepiness overwhelms me.

I know that I need to get a grip over my obsessive daydreaming, but at the same time I know I couldn't. The fantasy world has been the only thing keeping me sane and I fear that putting them away would take away my will to carry on. Without the comfort of the alternative realities I experience in my head I fear that I would be instantly plunged into a very, very dark place with no reprieve and no way out. Look like I'm truly stuck between a rock and a hard place and I wonder if anyone has any experience or thought on how to deal with this.
 
C

Cl0uds

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Joined
Feb 25, 2021
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Scotland
I deal with the same thing.
Sometimes I wonder if I'm only living to day dream. The dreams give me false hope and happiness and when I'm sucked into reality I panic greatly like I've forgotten how to be a normal human.
It swallows my time and I've come to prefer dreams to reality which is sad as I don't want to continue living in the clouds. I want to better my life.
I think it's maladaptive daydreaming.
I'm sorry I don't know how to calm the dreams or put them off completely as like you say; it's almost an obsession. But I'll let you know you're not alone, and all of this thinking can lead to some great creativity. I've started to be more open about it so people get a sense of why I disassociate sometimes so they at least don't think I'm being odd. Maybe if you can, time a slot in the day to just let your mind wonder and then you can have more focus for things that need to be done like chores etc. Music makes me dream a lot so I listen to music when doing chores so my mind can be else where whilst my body is working on autopilot. Don't know if that's helpful but stuff still gets done.
 
MeAndMyDepression

MeAndMyDepression

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Joined
Feb 6, 2021
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1,240
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Punta Gorda, Florida, USA
I've always been that kid whos described to be "lost in her own world", but the past few months have been debilitating. I guess this all stemmed from the emotional neglect I've experienced in my childhood. While my parents were well off and provided me with a rather luxurious lifestyle, they were never there for me emotionally. We rarely spoke at length, hugged or even had much physical contact at all. They were simply unavailable, and we did speak it was often a condescending and humiliating experience for me.

I think I have been depressed for a very, very long time. I've spoken to a school counsellor when I younger and she suggested that I should see a therapist or doctor because she suspects that I'm battling depression. I never did see anyone, mostly because of how beaten down I was and how difficult it is for me speak about my experience. Over the years I became so good at putting on a fake smile that no one is even aware of my agony anymore.

Daydreaming had been my only escape from the turmoil within. Whenever things get bad I would spend hours on end engrossed in the alternative reality I've created in my head. The fantasy I've put together has become so intricate and complex that it would possibly rival some movies, and while I know that they aren't real, that was (and still is) my only source of relief. This has now become an addition of some sort, I literally spend so much time making up stories that I literally cancel meetup with friends, postpone work and skip meals. When I wake up in the morning I would spent at least an hour daydreaming before crawling out of bed, and when I go to bed at night I will daydream for as long as I can before sleepiness overwhelms me.

I know that I need to get a grip over my obsessive daydreaming, but at the same time I know I couldn't. The fantasy world has been the only thing keeping me sane and I fear that putting them away would take away my will to carry on. Without the comfort of the alternative realities I experience in my head I fear that I would be instantly plunged into a very, very dark place with no reprieve and no way out. Look like I'm truly stuck between a rock and a hard place and I wonder if anyone has any experience or thought on how to deal with this.
Perhaps your parents, providing you with a rather luxurious lifestyle, thought that their money was all that you needed, and that's why they weren't there for you emotionally.
 
J

JeanPierre

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Joined
Jan 4, 2021
Messages
2,154
Location
Southern USA
I've always been that kid whos described to be "lost in her own world", but the past few months have been debilitating. I guess this all stemmed from the emotional neglect I've experienced in my childhood. While my parents were well off and provided me with a rather luxurious lifestyle, they were never there for me emotionally. We rarely spoke at length, hugged or even had much physical contact at all. They were simply unavailable, and we did speak it was often a condescending and humiliating experience for me.

I think I have been depressed for a very, very long time. I've spoken to a school counsellor when I younger and she suggested that I should see a therapist or doctor because she suspects that I'm battling depression. I never did see anyone, mostly because of how beaten down I was and how difficult it is for me speak about my experience. Over the years I became so good at putting on a fake smile that no one is even aware of my agony anymore.

Daydreaming had been my only escape from the turmoil within. Whenever things get bad I would spend hours on end engrossed in the alternative reality I've created in my head. The fantasy I've put together has become so intricate and complex that it would possibly rival some movies, and while I know that they aren't real, that was (and still is) my only source of relief. This has now become an addition of some sort, I literally spend so much time making up stories that I literally cancel meetup with friends, postpone work and skip meals. When I wake up in the morning I would spent at least an hour daydreaming before crawling out of bed, and when I go to bed at night I will daydream for as long as I can before sleepiness overwhelms me.

I know that I need to get a grip over my obsessive daydreaming, but at the same time I know I couldn't. The fantasy world has been the only thing keeping me sane and I fear that putting them away would take away my will to carry on. Without the comfort of the alternative realities I experience in my head I fear that I would be instantly plunged into a very, very dark place with no reprieve and no way out. Look like I'm truly stuck between a rock and a hard place and I wonder if anyone has any experience or thought on how to deal with this.
Welcome here. I'm sorry you are suffering but reaching out.
I make up stories in my head too. Sometimes write them out which I find a good thing.
But I wanted to say that going outside and noting the wonders of nature is awesome.
Just check out a tree, squirrels, birds, leaves on the ground, take a walk.
Like the old song goes, "it's a wonderful world".
And don't forget to drink lots of water. Best luck!
 
jajingna

jajingna

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Joined
Jul 31, 2020
Messages
5,537
Location
Canada
I fantasize a lot too, I guess mostly about past events, and it is obsessive when I do this. I've replayed old scenarios countless times, altering them in various ways, giving them different outcomes. Things I wish I said and done, constructing scenes, and imagining others responding in ways I'd enjoy. Fantasy is normal enough but maybe it is not so good when it occupies the mind so frequently.
 

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