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I can’t eat in my own house because of social anxiety

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depressed_person18

Active member
Joined
Nov 9, 2019
Messages
28
Location
United Kingdom
I live with a foster family and I’ve been struggling with anxiety around them for years... one of the problems the anxiety has caused is me being unable to go downstairs to grab something to eat when other people are there. I don’t speak a word to them unless I am spoken to so that is definitely a factor that contributes to my anxiety about being seen. I am anxious about entering the room when there are already a few members of my family in there. This problem has ruined my life for years, I can’t get enough to eat and I go starving for too long.
 
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Drama_llama

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 18, 2020
Messages
83
Location
Scotland
I can really relate to this. Even when it’s my family that I know really well, I won’t eat unless They’re eating as well, like at dinner/breakfast. If anyone looks at me when I’m eating it immediately puts me off my food and I’ll stop. I remember once at breakfast my aunt came to visit, I didn’t eat because she was there, she then left and someone else came to visit so I didn’t eat until dinner. I was starving that day as I hadn’t really ate the day before either. I never used to eat at school either so most days I’d just have dinner. I’m trying to get over it, as it’s not healthy to not eat. But I completely understand where your coming from.

I’m the same with entering a room with people in it as well. I was getting ready the other day, and heard lots of people In the living room. I waited 20 mins after getting ready before going down as I had to prepare myself for it. And even then my heart was racing.

I’m going to be getting help with my anxiety soon, is it possible for you do get help? I’d imagine it would make a great difference.
 
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karl7

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 9, 2013
Messages
591
i have social anxiety too.....i agree with the other poster you should look in to egtting help by seeking out a psychiatrist or therapist.....youre in yhe uk so you have the nhs which is a very good service......if you seek out a psychisatrist in the public sector, you will have access to a mental health team, which would include a psychiatrist, a psychologist, a CPN (community psych nurse) and an occupational therapist.....these people can help you immensely.....by the way just to tell you seeing a psychiatrist in the public sector is alot better than paying for one privately,.....in the public sector you have the whole mental health team supporting you for free!
 
jajingna

jajingna

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 31, 2020
Messages
1,324
Location
Canada
I'd like to get help as well. Not sure how much is available here these days with C-19 still on. It would be so nice to not be concerned so much with what others might think or say.
 
OCDguy

OCDguy

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 13, 2016
Messages
1,505
I live with a foster family and I’ve been struggling with anxiety around them for years... one of the problems the anxiety has caused is me being unable to go downstairs to grab something to eat when other people are there. I don’t speak a word to them unless I am spoken to so that is definitely a factor that contributes to my anxiety about being seen. I am anxious about entering the room when there are already a few members of my family in there. This problem has ruined my life for years, I can’t get enough to eat and I go starving for too long.
The onus should be on your foster family to make you feel welcome, relaxed and wanted/accepted as part of the family (did something not quite work out as it should have)? I can relate to not wanting to eat in front of people, especially strangers. Is there a member of the family you feel closest/most at ease with? Besides getting help (assuming you are even in a position to do that), it may help to get comfortable around one family member and perhaps confide a little as to how awkward you feel at times, or confide a little bit about some of your lesser insecurities (leave the bigger ones until you know you can trust that person etc.). Hopr this helps :)
 
OCDguy

OCDguy

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 13, 2016
Messages
1,505
I'd like to get help as well. Not sure how much is available here these days with C-19 still on. It would be so nice to not be concerned so much with what others might think or say.
Without knowing more it can be a little difficult to know of suggestions. If it helps, when I was facing Social Anxiety I used to focus on what I can do, rather than what I can't do. It's okay to go out of your comfort zone a little, but keep things manageable, and have a backup/escape plan if things get too rough. As you become more relaxed, you can then take another manageable step forward... Hope this helps :)
 
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Headingtothelight

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 6, 2020
Messages
148
Location
scotland
I was in foster care too i know exactly how you feel with not being able to go downstairs when there’s people in ive been bursting for a pee before and couldn’t go to toilet and pass the livingroom it’s a horrible thing to experience such anxiety I wish that i didn’t care and i was more happy go lucky
 
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