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I am stuck in a rut. Not sure what to do.

I

insert_name

New member
Joined
Jan 8, 2021
Messages
2
Location
india
Hi! I'm a 25 year old graduate student. My life has been in a downward spiral for the last many years. There was a temporary moment of respite but it was ephemeral. I don't feel like doing anything at all. Haven't felt doing like anything for the last decade. Everything I do is to make sure I don't end up starving one day. That's all the motivation left in life. Nothing interests me anymore. Things that I was passionate about in the past don't really arouse the same feelings in me. I have tried therapy before and it hasn't worked. I neither have the patience, nor the monetary resources to continue with therapy. Besides, it will hinder my career prospects and there is a cultural taboo as well. I consciously took the decision to drop out of it cause I felt like I was weakening myself. People around me seem to get a lot of things easily which they take for granted. I hardly have any friends, can't get along with most people and find it really hard to hold down a job. My fucked up mental state ensures that I suck at any new activity I undertake. I don't like living with my parents either. Can't wait to strike out on my own. But all my savings are gone. I haven't been productive for the last many days and there's something really holding me back. I don't know what it is. It's been this way for the last 7 years, at least. I was miserable throughout University but I thought it'd change. It didn't. Uni was a massive waste of mine. Can't see how it could have been any different had I done it differently. Future doesn't look very bright right now. Not like it ever did. I was always told I'd be either mediocre or a failure. Pretty much failed at everything I did. I am extremely frustrated at this point and don't know what else to do. I don't even know what I want in life anymore. I know there are people who have it a lot harder than me but I am not them. Getting through the day has become hella difficult. Pls suggest a way out of this misery. I absolutely resent everyone and everything around me, those from my past and those that will come by in the future. The only thing that gets me off any more is my own pain and seeing others in pain. Spreading misery all around me and poison in the lives of those in my family and circle feels like the only meaningful thing left to do now. Cherry on the cake - I am developing a drinking issue. It was always on the cards but now I it is very much in sight. My physical health has suffered a lot in the last half a decade or so. I no longer feel healthy - mentally or physically.
 
D

Daringdan

Well-known member
Joined
May 8, 2020
Messages
293
Location
Louisville, Ky
Hi there insert_name,
It's good that you came here to express your feelings and to reach out for help. I'm sorry that you have had to go through so much for so long. There is this belief that someday all of our miseries and sorrows will be transformed into something wonderful. That would mean that there is no such thing as meaningless suffering. Sometimes we have to wait for good things to emerge into our lives and while we wait we keep on trying to what is right and healthy. I hope what I've wrote here supports you at least in some small way.
 
I

insert_name

New member
Joined
Jan 8, 2021
Messages
2
Location
india
Hi there insert_name,
It's good that you came here to express your feelings and to reach out for help. I'm sorry that you have had to go through so much for so long. There is this belief that someday all of our miseries and sorrows will be transformed into something wonderful. That would mean that there is no such thing as meaningless suffering. Sometimes we have to wait for good things to emerge into our lives and while we wait we keep on trying to what is right and healthy. I hope what I've wrote here supports you at least in some small way.

Thanks @Daringdan. My life trajectory has been such that whatever happens, it only sets up me for more misery and disappointment. All things point in that direction only. So it's kinda hard for me to hold out to any hope. But I get where you are coming from. Thanks again.
 
P

PureDevo

Member
Joined
Jan 11, 2021
Messages
24
Location
Québec
Hello!
We have the same age with a totally different course of life. If you want to talk you are welcome to private message me.
Life is hard and if you can find one little positive thing about anything (except drinking) make it your world and focus on it. It might open up some other stuff you might like and slowly you can love yourself and love things around you!
I know cheesy right?! Well it might work, so how about you give it a try!
 
T

treasurebox

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 14, 2018
Messages
509
Location
Philippines
There will be better days for you. Create happy moments because happiness is a choice. Forget the past and move on to a better you. Think positive and you will have peace and gladness. Refrain from thinking negative and troublesome thoughts. You can do it.

Music helps me. Music is therapeutic. Listen to good, uplifting and encouraging music on youtube.
 
K

karl7

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 9, 2013
Messages
936
Hi! I'm a 25 year old graduate student. My life has been in a downward spiral for the last many years. There was a temporary moment of respite but it was ephemeral. I don't feel like doing anything at all. Haven't felt doing like anything for the last decade. Everything I do is to make sure I don't end up starving one day. That's all the motivation left in life. Nothing interests me anymore. Things that I was passionate about in the past don't really arouse the same feelings in me. I have tried therapy before and it hasn't worked. I neither have the patience, nor the monetary resources to continue with therapy. Besides, it will hinder my career prospects and there is a cultural taboo as well. I consciously took the decision to drop out of it cause I felt like I was weakening myself. People around me seem to get a lot of things easily which they take for granted. I hardly have any friends, can't get along with most people and find it really hard to hold down a job. My fucked up mental state ensures that I suck at any new activity I undertake. I don't like living with my parents either. Can't wait to strike out on my own. But all my savings are gone. I haven't been productive for the last many days and there's something really holding me back. I don't know what it is. It's been this way for the last 7 years, at least. I was miserable throughout University but I thought it'd change. It didn't. Uni was a massive waste of mine. Can't see how it could have been any different had I done it differently. Future doesn't look very bright right now. Not like it ever did. I was always told I'd be either mediocre or a failure. Pretty much failed at everything I did. I am extremely frustrated at this point and don't know what else to do. I don't even know what I want in life anymore. I know there are people who have it a lot harder than me but I am not them. Getting through the day has become hella difficult. Pls suggest a way out of this misery. I absolutely resent everyone and everything around me, those from my past and those that will come by in the future. The only thing that gets me off any more is my own pain and seeing others in pain. Spreading misery all around me and poison in the lives of those in my family and circle feels like the only meaningful thing left to do now. Cherry on the cake - I am developing a drinking issue. It was always on the cards but now I it is very much in sight. My physical health has suffered a lot in the last half a decade or so. I no longer feel healthy - mentally or physically.
firstly Welcome to the forums.....i believe therapy can help you....depression can be treated.....i know when i was depressed and in despair i would have liked someone to tell me that the depression will pass, you will get better.....it is the truth.....just take it as easy as possible.....we here on the forum care and want to help you....keep up posting here on the forum for support....., by the way your english is excellent.
 
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