I am not myself, but who am I, please??

[jessicajay]

I won't go into detail, but over the last 2 years have lost my professional career , my husband (left), and now more. I am now going through courts to resolve other issues. THe last few weeks have become a nightmare. Tiredness, headaches, irrationality, racing heart (cant have the phone ring, or the doorbell go, just cant calm down if that happens), nervous, muddled head, cant talk to anyone about my personal situation or my feelings just get out of control, either anger, or distress, or just want to curl up ( I did today on the pavement, a grown woman, how pathetic!) . Cant predict how i will react to anything. Getting through the day hard, . What is wrong with me. I dont really want to go to the doctors and get medical notes which prevent me from getting a career back. Cant go on like this. Just want to go to sleep and it all to be over with, but feel like adrenelin overload so cant anyway! Can anyone tell me what is going on! This forum is it feels my last hope to get some sense from anyone. Jessie

 

[starfish]

jessicajay

i am sorry you are having such a bad time of it right now. you have a lot to deal with. it does seem to me that you are suffering with depression and anxiety. do you have some one you can confide in? if not you could ask your gp for some councelling and /or medication. as regards to your work, you should be protected by privacy laws. you could speak to either your gp or some one at a citizens advice bureau.about this, take care.

 

[getting better]

Jessicajay, your post could have been written by me a few months ago. Please go to your Dr and you'll find the help you need. Maybe you just need to talk to somebody but in my experience the anxiety, depression and general feeling of hoplessness only calmed down with medication.

 

[jessicajay]

who am I ?

Thank you for replies, pls tell me if I am doing this wrong by the way as not that comp' literate!! Citizens advice seems good idea. I do have a close friend trying to persuade me to go to Docs. Thank you for all advice, I certainly think I have anxiety after going on the NHS questionnaire thing, which also advised goint to the Doc. thanks, Jessie.

 

[NrLondonGuy]

Hi

Sent you a personal message PM. Hope it helps. As you said you are not comp lit you shoudl see top right of page : )

 

[SimonB]

Hi....your medical records are confidential and there is no reason why going to see your GP will interfere with your getting another job.

You need to deal with this so that you can move on and deal with all those other issues you have...right now this is more important, the guys on this forum do speak from experience.

Please go and see your GP, its a start

 

[NrLondonGuy]

Hi Sent you a PM - probably too long as suffer from obsessive writting as part of my OCD and you may not know how to access PM if you are not a techi. to summarise:

Go to GP, Realise this is just temporary - you are going through a very hard time (with anxiety and stress). You may need talking therpay and or medicaitons. These can help you through a difficult time and therpies teahc you how to deal with the thoughts/life that fuel stress anxiety.

Don't worry about work. world will still be there in 6 months time. Focus on getting better and then you can focus on career when better. Otherwise may be counter productive. (I am on sick leave for a year and really not bothered as health first and job will still be there when I go back). Employers cannot sack you and have to be stricly confidential abotu yoru problems.

Im mean time following may help as can take a while to get a coucilor of CBT therpist:

exericse - really relaxes you
Hot baths - really relaxes you too!!
talk to poeple but be aware of their role. DOn't keep it all in your head.
Read books and websites about coping with anxiety and stress - loads of good techniques info out there
learn breathing exercises -(can stop panic attacks)
mindfullness meditation works wonders for stress and anxiety - take a while to get hang of though.
Just be aware you don't have to sort all your life probblems out today. Take some time out and focus on yourself and getting better.
Although you sound pretty stressed and stuff others have been much worse and recovered and got their lifes back on track cos they did teh right things.
When you are feeling a bit better maybe go to a support gorup for stress anxiety - always great to know you are not a freak and others have been/are going through same and they always have advice and comfort for you,

Hope some of that helps. Start with GP though.

 

[jessicajay]

Who am I ? Thank you to all of you

Hi ,

I would just like to thank all of you for your replies and wonderful advice. It is so nice just to know I am not the only one in the world feeling like this! (or who has felt like this!) If I am supposed to send individual replies please tell me as this is all new to me! Thank you again to everyone,
Jessie.

 

[NrLondonGuy]

Great hope things helped. Worst mistake you can ever do is to do nothing, talk to noone, keep it all in your head and expect mind to sort itself out (can do sometimes though). That was my worse mistake in life and why I ended up in ways I was. (had good times too though and optimistic will make good recovery myself as will get right help soon for OCD and problems. If I had known 10 years ago what I know now alot woudl have been avoided and I woudl have never gone through the hell I did. Talk to poeple and find out about things. Therpay and medicaiotns are main ways to sort problems out but there are so many other complimentary thinsg in life that help thorugh these hard times and with life in general. : ). (some I listed above). Websites, therapists, GP, forums, books, other sufferers and stuff will tell you all these things. Also when you do the right stuff you will soon start feeling yourself again and will look back and realise 'it was me actually - just me bloody stressed!!!). For now though as Winston Churchill said - If you're in hell - keep going" It resonates.