- Jul 19, 2019
- United Kingdon
You made many good points there. Only time will tell whether or not it’s “love”, I guess. All I know is that I really liked the man, I never viewed him as having power however, I just perceived him as an average, simple minded guy. Thank you that, it put my mind at ease. I know I shouldn’t worry about him, I know I shouldn’t take responsibility for his actions but my worker at the mental health centre along with nicks colleagues have CONSTANTLY said “you can’t blame anyone else, you caused this”. I hope you realise why my mind is messed up, I’m being told different things and I don’t know what the truth is anymore. All the “professionals” are against me, it really hurts and it’s frustrating. I’m glad I have had some amazing answers - one of them being yours. Thanks again xThis is breaking codes of practice and crossing major boundaries. Mental health professionals should only see their patients at appointment, no where else.
He should be investigated if he said and did these things though because he has been working with you from a young age and has contaminated the patient-nurse relationship by saying things like "you rock my world."
That's not just being kind, that's REALLY inappropriate because he is leading you on by clearly and openly expressing romantic feelings for you.I hope he didn't abuse you in any other way.
Also you may have been legal at 16, but he is a LOT older than you at 54. He is old enough to be your grandfather, which makes it even more wrong.
He is a mature adult and should be using his judgement, not behaving in this way.
I want you to be clear on something.
There's no reason to fear him committing suicide. This is unlikely to happen and in the unlikely event where it did, you don't need to take responsibility for what he did, HE needs to take responsibility.
These are HIS inappropriate actions, not yours, when he was at the age of ADULT responsibility. You "don't want to find he committed suicide over you" ?! You are starting to feel guilty and make it seem your fault, your responsibility, when you already had mental illness from a young age and don't need extra mental burdens. So you develop a guilt complex over something that has absolutely nothing to do with you and is actually his fault: the result of his actions.
Also in another sense, you shouldn't be worrying about how HE is feeling because he is not the patient. You are the patient. So when you start to worry about him you are in the wrong role as you should be the one that is being cared for. This is unprofessional. Least of all you should not be worrying about him hating you. You should be worrying about getting better.
This isn't right somehow. It's nice to have a mental health worker who is there for you and makes you happy, but at the same time, something else is mixed in and it isn't right.
From what you have said, and from having been your age, I honestly view it as an intense infatuation that won't last and you will see it as wrong when you recognise that he is in a position of power and is much, much, much older than you. I think you are right to be creeped out. I don't think you should view this as you being 'in love' with him. He has just mixed up the role of nurse and confused things for you.