E
Easy Rider
Well-known member
I damned well blew 280 pounds gambling today. It was payday and I had 3070 pounds in the bank and was all excited and took 200 in thinking I could just wager a hundy and probably treble it or stop if I lost it.
Sweet effing Mary.
Now I have 2800 and will need another 250 of it to live on so only 2550 instead of the 2800 I would have. By my savings plan I am like a grand lower than what it's supposed to be coz I've done this every payday for the last few months.
I really need to stop this or I'll never be able to do the MA I want to do next September. I am 38 years old, have a degree and only have ab embarrassing 2800 pounds to my bloody name. I've gambled 50k in the past ten years, I should have that in the bank now and knowing this sucks so much.
I think I need a tattoo "gambling is not a way to accrue money or financial security."
Maybe not, wouldn't make a cool 'Ink.'
I just need to get the message through to my stupid head....
I feel like hurting myself but am too much of a wimp to do even that so will wallow in self pity for the rest of the day and convince myself I'll stop now.
The thought has crept in to my mind that I need to make a mark on my arm that will remind me next time I think about doing it - not to do it.
I wont do this either.
I wish I could just stop it. Just grow out of it.
Sweet effing Mary.
Now I have 2800 and will need another 250 of it to live on so only 2550 instead of the 2800 I would have. By my savings plan I am like a grand lower than what it's supposed to be coz I've done this every payday for the last few months.
I really need to stop this or I'll never be able to do the MA I want to do next September. I am 38 years old, have a degree and only have ab embarrassing 2800 pounds to my bloody name. I've gambled 50k in the past ten years, I should have that in the bank now and knowing this sucks so much.
I think I need a tattoo "gambling is not a way to accrue money or financial security."
Maybe not, wouldn't make a cool 'Ink.'
I just need to get the message through to my stupid head....
I feel like hurting myself but am too much of a wimp to do even that so will wallow in self pity for the rest of the day and convince myself I'll stop now.
The thought has crept in to my mind that I need to make a mark on my arm that will remind me next time I think about doing it - not to do it.
I wont do this either.
I wish I could just stop it. Just grow out of it.
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