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i am a misanthrop?

C

cyclonite

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Nov 23, 2014
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i am 21 years old and since i remember myself i had a lot of problems to connect to other kids and i had only 3-4 friends in my life(one is my cousin and the other two are my neighbors, and they are brothers) and i grew apart from them around the age of 12(around the age of 10 we were barely "friends") and i realy started to hate my cousin when he started to visit my family and stay at our house for days.

my lack of social life was not just cause i don't have social skills but also cause i hate people in general, i like nothing about anyone i see and mostly i just hate people as more i get to know them. my feelings toward people in general are ranged from mild dislike for them to realy hate them, especialy when they are in groups or are just noisy people. it got to the point that for some period in my life(somewher in my teens) i felt uncomfortable to go out of my house(for buying some groceries or something to eat like pizza) without a knife in my pocket cause i knew the only way to deal with several people who gangs up against you is with a knife or gun.
sometimes i even feel a need to attack somebody which i realy hate or even are just too noisy, sometimes i feel like most people are my enemies and that i need to attack them first before they do it to me.

it even affected my sexuality, i feel no sexual attraction for women anymore(nor men) or the will to have sex with anyone, the act of having sex with some girl looks boring as washing the dishes for me while i do remember in my childhood that i had thoughts about kissing girls but it faded long time ago.


i simply don't like people in general and i barely can feel empathy for people anymore but it is treatable atleast for some degree? dose my situation is called "misanthropy"? i readed that misanthropes can have at least very minimal social life despite the general dislike of people in general. i hope to know at least if my situation have a name and people who know more about it and how to treat it.
 
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SomersetScorpio

SomersetScorpio

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Welcome to the forum.
I don't know if "misanthropy" is really a medical term (but I could be wrong).
Have you ever had any kind of assessment from mental health?
It could be that this is anxiety, attachment issues, depression, asperger's/autism, etc. etc.

I can't possibly say what's "wrong" because i'm not medically trained, but if this is something that you would like to change, I think getting some professional support is the way forward.
 
C

cyclonite

New member
Joined
Nov 23, 2014
Messages
2
Welcome to the forum.
I don't know if "misanthropy" is really a medical term (but I could be wrong).
Have you ever had any kind of assessment from mental health?
It could be that this is anxiety, attachment issues, depression, asperger's/autism, etc. etc.

I can't possibly say what's "wrong" because i'm not medically trained, but if this is something that you would like to change, I think getting some professional support is the way forward.
i was with a lot with psychologists when i was a child and didn't diagnosed as asperger/autistic so i don't think its part of my problem. i am with a therapist now and i told her about stuff like what i feel when there is group of people next to me and about my shyness with people and she told me that i am just was alone too much, but i didn't told her about my hatred to people and my violent hostility toward most people i don't know.

i think my real problem is hatred toward people in general and especialy toward people which i don't know and it makes it hard for me to have friends. it will help me if that condition have a name and i can find more people like that which i mybe could talk to them about it.
 
porkpie

porkpie

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I'm not a medical professional but some of your presentation does sound like you could be on the Autistic Spectrum, especially the hatred and hostility you feel towards people, maybe its a lack of empathy or emotional detachment and lack of social awareness thats making you feel the way you do? Its not uncommon with people with ASD. Doesn't mean your a bad person you just need to learn the right emotional responses to respond to situations.
 
SomersetScorpio

SomersetScorpio

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Joined
Aug 17, 2012
Messages
13,529
Location
The West Country
It's difficult.
I think that it's due to my sensitivity and my secret hope/expectation that the world should be "nice", that there are times when I am hugely disappointed and disillusioned by life.
When i'm in one of those moods, a part of me does think that I hate people.

Having said that, on an individual level, I am hugely compassionate and will do anything to help anybody. The thought of anybody hurting distresses me.
I suppose it's when I think of people as more of a collective rather than individual hearts and souls, it's very easy to get into that trap of thinking "people are selfish/horrible/bastards" etc.

Do you think there's an anger towards people, or a feeling of disappointment or rejection?
It seems like maybe there could be an explanation for what you're feeling, if you dig deep enough.

To play devil's advocate, I do think that there is generally quite a lot of negativity from people in this society, and our better traits like compassion and altruism are crushed in favour of being selfish and cut-off from out emotions.
 
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