• Welcome! It’s great to see you. Our forum members are people, maybe like yourself, who experience mental health difficulties or who have had them at some point in their life.

    If you'd like to talk with people who know what it's like

I’m still confused about my sibling

C

Cornflowerblue

Active member
Joined
Aug 4, 2020
Messages
36
Location
UK
Hi all, please let me have your opinions.

Does the type of person I describe below sound like someone high on narcissistic traits? I have been cruelly invalidated and suffered for so long that I can’t trust my own judgement. I guess if quite a few people agree with my theory that this person is indeed a narcissist to some degree then I may finally have some answers as to why I suffered and continue to suffer even today. Every opinion and comment counts. Many thanks.

........

She needs to be superior, right, or in charge all of the time.

She has to be the boss. You are for her or you are against her.

She is self absorbed.

She is happy with you only as long as you always say yes. Anything else makes you the problem.

Makes no effort to truly empathise or listen. Not sure if she is capable.

She can never be in the wrong, she has never said sorry over anything Ever in decades. She never sees her part in any problem.

She can never be criticised, her motives can never be questioned in the slightest or there will be no explanation but full blown rage.

Any kind of dissent or disagreement is badly received and results in fighting or cold dismissal and possible complete cut off to punish the dissenter.

She never openly discusses her own feelings.She shares very little personal or ‘real’ info about her personal life or feelings.

She is surrounded by ‘yes people’ who bite their tongues , people indebted to her, people in awe of her, people who want something from her and people she controls for one reason or another.

She is highly social, extroverted and thrives on admiration and has a very large circle of ‘friends’ , followers and admirers. People must treat her with the respect she ‘deserves’.

It appears opinions of family members are not as important as those of outsiders to preserve her image.

She likes family best when they are broken or needy for her to ‘help fix’ and control if needed. She is entitled and expects them to bend to her wishes if necessary in return for all her ‘goodness’.

She has a black belt in arguing and can say extremely cold and unkind things.She can also be very nice, loving and generous too on occasion which causes confusion and imbalance in me and possibly others too.

She is dominating. Her issues are real and important. Your issues are due to being overly sensitive, stupid or selfish whatever the situation demands .

Her choices sometimes appear to be cold, calculating and callous under the guise of expediency and practicality

I think she probably feels sad, lonely and empty at times but will not allow people in.

Interactions with her may be few now but have always always been anxiety inducing from a young age and leave me hurting and confused. I feel small and helpless, erased.
 
A

Am33

Well-known member
Joined
Sep 28, 2020
Messages
153
Location
Fiji
Sounds like a narcissist very common in todays world . Find a picture of her really smiling now look at her eyes do they smile also ? If not then most likely from my experience she is a sociopath.
 
C

Cornflowerblue

Active member
Joined
Aug 4, 2020
Messages
36
Location
UK
Sounds like a narcissist very common in todays world . Find a picture of her really smiling now look at her eyes do they smile also ? If not then most likely from my experience she is a sociopath.
Thankyou for your input
 
Z

Zaz2020

ACCOUNT CLOSED
Joined
Oct 16, 2020
Messages
380
Location
.
She just sounds self-centred to me
 
OCDguy

OCDguy

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 13, 2016
Messages
1,520
It all sounds a bit judgemental to me. Another way of looking at things are possibly good for your well-being, or bad for your well-beingl...
 
JessisMe

JessisMe

Well-known member
Joined
Feb 27, 2020
Messages
4,733
Location
Nashua NH
Sounds to me to be self centered rather than narcissist.
 
C

Cornflowerblue

Active member
Joined
Aug 4, 2020
Messages
36
Location
UK
Sounds to me to be self centered rather than narcissist.
Thanks for your input. What would make a person like that narcissistic in your opinion? I wrote these traits down honestly and compared it afterwards to classic description of narcissistic behaviour and it seems to agree.
 
C

Cornflowerblue

Active member
Joined
Aug 4, 2020
Messages
36
Location
UK
I have to agree with zaz2020 she sounds very me me me all the time
thanks for your comment. To me this description sounds narcissistic. What traits would make someone like that not just selfish but narcissistic? I’m curious as to what actually makes people narcissistic. Thanks
 
Z

Zaz2020

ACCOUNT CLOSED
Joined
Oct 16, 2020
Messages
380
Location
.
I don't really know. It's a thin line between a mental illness and just being nasty.
 
Scapes1986

Scapes1986

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 10, 2020
Messages
2,720
Location
Planet Mercury
I’d give up if I wasn’t such a kind person, as for advice, looking into the future, positively, has helped me a lot. Also being a good listener. And keeping a good temper. These three things are things I’ve recently discovered in a family relationship that have increased my life’s attitude positively. It’s always a personal problem if anger and greed arise, but freeing yourself of negativity can rid you of such problems...
 
M

Mistral

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 28, 2011
Messages
405
I’d give up if I wasn’t such a kind person, as for advice, looking into the future, positively, has helped me a lot. Also being a good listener. And keeping a good temper. These three things are things I’ve recently discovered in a family relationship that have increased my life’s attitude positively. It’s always a personal problem if anger and greed arise, but freeing yourself of negativity can rid you of such problems...
Yes try to be more positive. Rants about family members here will not give you the answers you need.
 
Scapes1986

Scapes1986

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 10, 2020
Messages
2,720
Location
Planet Mercury
Yes try to be more positive. Rants about family members here will not give you the answers you need.
Only you ca n provide that. I learned this.. but in all reality this was a really nice post.
 
C

Cornflowerblue

Active member
Joined
Aug 4, 2020
Messages
36
Location
UK
I’d give up if I wasn’t such a kind person, as for advice, looking into the future, positively, has helped me a lot. Also being a good listener. And keeping a good temper. These three things are things I’ve recently discovered in a family relationship that have increased my life’s attitude positively. It’s always a personal problem if anger and greed arise, but freeing yourself of negativity can rid you of such problems...
I don’t understand how this relates to my original post, sorry?
 
C

Cornflowerblue

Active member
Joined
Aug 4, 2020
Messages
36
Location
UK
Only you ca n provide that. I learned this.. but in all reality this was a really nice post.
Hi I am losing the thread here I’m afraid. How does this relate to my original post please explain. Thanks
 
Top