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Loochx

Member
Joined
Oct 9, 2019
Messages
13
Location
Leicester
Just created an account as recently I’ve found out I have personality disorder, I’m 21, I’ve been looking for a diagnosis since I was 8, and when I reached 13 I started spiralling, I tried to commit suicide when I was 13 because of a relationship I was treated badly in (I know I was 13, but for the age it was a very intense relationship for that age) it got too much for me, from then I can’t even count how many times I’ve attempted, not gonna lie, sometimes I don’t even want to die, I just want to take some in order to feel asleep, I just don’t wanna wake up and I want to feel numb because my brain just frazzles when bad things happen and I can’t cope which results into impulsive behaviour and psychotic episodes.

But anyway, just want to chat to people, I want to finally speak to people that have the same isssues as me and i guess it would just be so nice to relate, I wanna know that I’m not alone because I’m sick as being labelled a psycho or a nut case, because I know I’m not, I’m just coping in a different way too others.
 
Lunus

Lunus

Well-known member
Joined
May 20, 2019
Messages
1,081
Location
Norfolk
Welcome to the forum! You are certainly not alone, they sound common symptoms. It sounds as if your emotions are so overwhelming and painful and the suffering is too great, you have to detach as real life gets too painful. This detachment causes reactions like impulsive behaviour, acting on urges with no fear of consequences. Look into Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT). It’s specially designed for BPD and will help you regulate your emotions.
Post anything you like on here, usually someone will respond with good advice. You’re never alone. x
 
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EstherRose94

Well-known member
Joined
Mar 2, 2019
Messages
2,150
Location
USA
Welcome Lucia! You’re not crazy, we can relate. I think you’ll receive some wholesome support on here.
 
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Zoe1

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 8, 2019
Messages
4,855
Location
Nowhere
hi Loochx welcome ! :welcome:

not the same diagnosis as you
but lots of similarities

you might like to post in the introductions here
so that you will get more welcomes

lots of people have mental illnesses these days
like one in 4 people or something

can I ask how old you are by the way ?

:grouphug:🌷
 
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Loochx

Member
Joined
Oct 9, 2019
Messages
13
Location
Leicester
Welcome to the forum! You are certainly not alone, they sound common symptoms. It sounds as if your emotions are so overwhelming and painful and the suffering is too great, you have to detach as real life gets too painful. This detachment causes reactions like impulsive behaviour, acting on urges with no fear of consequences. Look into Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT). It’s specially designed for BPD and will help you regulate your emotions.
Post anything you like on here, usually someone will respond with good advice. You’re never alone. x

Thankyou! I will look into this, I need some sort of therapy! I’m starting a group one soon at my hospital hopefully that helps too! Xx
 
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Loochx

Member
Joined
Oct 9, 2019
Messages
13
Location
Leicester
hi Loochx welcome ! :welcome:

not the same diagnosis as you
but lots of similarities

you might like to post in the introductions here
so that you will get more welcomes

lots of people have mental illnesses these days
like one in 4 people or something

can I ask how old you are by the way ?

:grouphug:🌷

Hi Zoe, and I’m 21, I’ve been in and out of doctors since I was 8, and tbh I only really started realising myself these past few years maybe there is something different, well, I always felt different but I didn’t think it was abnormal to others, I just thought i felt too hard, I’ve always been quite a popular person throughout schools, and work, and in general with friendships, but I’ve hid it, my close friends probably noticed things, but tbh they probably just saw me as a bit mad, I don’t think anyone really looked into it as much, and now I really get it, I still haven’t told many people though, I just don’t know how they’d take it or even believe me, you know what people are like... x
 
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Zoe1

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 8, 2019
Messages
4,855
Location
Nowhere
yes most peopl I know
dont know my diagnosis
they might know I have had some mh problems
but the extent of it I dont reveal
 
L

Loochx

Member
Joined
Oct 9, 2019
Messages
13
Location
Leicester
yes most peopl I know
dont know my diagnosis
they might know I have had some mh problems
but the extent of it I dont reveal
Me too! Only because I feel most people won’t understand and when I explain what I’m feeling about something, they say they understand and they feel the same when I know they really don’t know the Extent of my pain and it’s frustrating, because I know I feel pain like normal people but I feel it’s 100x worse than a person without personality disorder?
 
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EstherRose94

Well-known member
Joined
Mar 2, 2019
Messages
2,150
Location
USA
Me too! Only because I feel most people won’t understand and when I explain what I’m feeling about something, they say they understand and they feel the same when I know they really don’t know the Extent of my pain and it’s frustrating, because I know I feel pain like normal people but I feel it’s 100x worse than a person without personality disorder?
It definitely feels like it is. I’m pretty sure I’ve been repressing all my good and bad emotions since I was little because they are just like too much for a kid. And now that I’m not a kid I’m like I’d rather not feel them ALL at once but I’m pretty sure that’s gonna have to happen lol.
 
L

Loochx

Member
Joined
Oct 9, 2019
Messages
13
Location
Leicester
It definitely feels like it is. I’m pretty sure I’ve been repressing all my good and bad emotions since I was little because they are just like too much for a kid. And now that I’m not a kid I’m like I’d rather not feel them ALL at once but I’m pretty sure that’s gonna have to happen lol.
I have been extremely emotional since a child, they say things trigger it and you can have small or big traumas that subconsciously stay with you forever which makes you act like the person you are, which I think is a huge part of mine x
 
Z

Zoe1

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 8, 2019
Messages
4,855
Location
Nowhere
yes I dont see the point of revealing my diagnosis
to people that I sense will judge me for it

posting here is very helpful to sort through some issues
and you might need a talking therapy
that is the right type for your illness
I dont know if its DBT or something

they dont like paying for that
so you might need some legal advice about it
 
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EstherRose94

Well-known member
Joined
Mar 2, 2019
Messages
2,150
Location
USA
Or if you’re still in school you probably can access something for free on your campus
 
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Newtobpd98

New member
Joined
Oct 10, 2019
Messages
3
Location
Nottinghamshire
Just created an account as recently I’ve found out I have personality disorder, I’m 21, I’ve been looking for a diagnosis since I was 8, and when I reached 13 I started spiralling, I tried to commit suicide when I was 13 because of a relationship I was treated badly in (I know I was 13, but for the age it was a very intense relationship for that age) it got too much for me, from then I can’t even count how many times I’ve attempted, not gonna lie, sometimes I don’t even want to die, I just want to take some in order to feel asleep, I just don’t wanna wake up and I want to feel numb because my brain just frazzles when bad things happen and I can’t cope which results into impulsive behaviour and psychotic episodes.

But anyway, just want to chat to people, I want to finally speak to people that have the same isssues as me and i guess it would just be so nice to relate, I wanna know that I’m not alone because I’m sick as being labelled a psycho or a nut case, because I know I’m not, I’m just coping in a different way too others.
I’m also 21 and just been diagnosed it’s nice to see someone else in the same boat. I’ve been waiting since I was 9 for a diagnosis we ended up having to go to a private psychiatric assessment. I’ve also joined for the same reason to get to know and understand other people with bpd
 
Lunus

Lunus

Well-known member
Joined
May 20, 2019
Messages
1,081
Location
Norfolk
I’m also 21 and just been diagnosed it’s nice to see someone else in the same boat. I’ve been waiting since I was 9 for a diagnosis we ended up having to go to a private psychiatric assessment. I’ve also joined for the same reason to get to know and understand other people with bpd
It’s important to realise that genetics play a large part (60-70%) in BPD with either trauma or an invalidating environment accounting for the rest. A lot of us suffer from a very young age whilst my psychologist told me nobody will ever be diagnosed until at least 18 as the experts believe our brains are still developing until that age, but many people have suffered so much by then.
Always remember BPD is NOT a life sentence, with therapy you can learn techniques that will allow you to control and manage your emotions.
 
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