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I’m about ready to give up on pushing for help

O

OoO

Member
Joined
Oct 22, 2020
Messages
8
Location
UK
Sorry if this doesn’t read well, I just wrote it all in one (indignant) go. Hopefully someone can advise me on what to do now.

For the last couple of years, I’ve been in crisis. During that time, I’ve constantly had multiple, ever changing diagnoses, but never anything official. I’ve pushed for clarity and been told one thing and then read the opposite whenever I can procure my notes. There’s been endless false information, omitted information and mixups made by psychiatrists, doctors, nurses and social workers in the two separate areas I’ve lived in. Mental health services have been incredibly elusive: not answering phone calls or calling back; giving me endless “assessments”, after which I never get to hear what they made of them. I imagine they haven’t even taken any notes and are just trying to make it look like they’re doing something so I don’t file another complaint. The mental health teams I’ve been under have each spoken over and over about referring me to a more suitable one but that hasn’t happened. I’ve been on waiting lists for therapy, which hasn’t happened. I had a stay in a mental health ward, during which the staff never spoke to me - it wasn’t at all therapeutic, it was more like prison. I recently fled domestic abuse and my so-called “care coordinator”, whom I’d never had one conversation with (my previous one was fired after I complained), told multiple lies in order to force me back to my hometown and avoid their team having to fund my housing. I’m now out of the mental health system and I don’t see much hope in trying to get back in and get the help I’m desperate for - I’m clearly not going to get it.
 
jajingna

jajingna

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Jul 31, 2020
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Location
Canada
That sounds rough. Welcome to the forum in any case.
 
HLon99

HLon99

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Joined
Apr 15, 2020
Messages
280
Location
London, UK
Sounds like you've been through quite a lot. The mental health services are very badly underfunded and heavily dysfunctional in this country so often times its up to the patient to chase up on them, which hardly seems fair because a lot of them are in crisis when they need help the most, but it is what it is. I was lucky enough to get 2 amazing and very experienced psychiatrists who helped me through a lot. But even they were very let down by the system. Whenever I contacted the reception team at my local clinic for admin issues, I was stonewalled for months. Because of their incompetence, I couldn't get the referral I needed to get therapy and have all but given up on trying. I have now decided to go down the private route for psychotherapy. Perhaps that's something that you ought to consider, if you have insurance. If not, I suggest you nag and nag and nag, go over heads and steamroll through until you get the help you need. Don't give in, there is a way around this system.
 
L

Lavendergirl

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 24, 2020
Messages
160
Location
London
Sorry if this doesn’t read well, I just wrote it all in one (indignant) go. Hopefully someone can advise me on what to do now.

For the last couple of years, I’ve been in crisis. During that time, I’ve constantly had multiple, ever changing diagnoses, but never anything official. I’ve pushed for clarity and been told one thing and then read the opposite whenever I can procure my notes. There’s been endless false information, omitted information and mixups made by psychiatrists, doctors, nurses and social workers in the two separate areas I’ve lived in. Mental health services have been incredibly elusive: not answering phone calls or calling back; giving me endless “assessments”, after which I never get to hear what they made of them. I imagine they haven’t even taken any notes and are just trying to make it look like they’re doing something so I don’t file another complaint. The mental health teams I’ve been under have each spoken over and over about referring me to a more suitable one but that hasn’t happened. I’ve been on waiting lists for therapy, which hasn’t happened. I had a stay in a mental health ward, during which the staff never spoke to me - it wasn’t at all therapeutic, it was more like prison. I recently fled domestic abuse and my so-called “care coordinator”, whom I’d never had one conversation with (my previous one was fired after I complained), told multiple lies in order to force me back to my hometown and avoid their team having to fund my housing. I’m now out of the mental health system and I don’t see much hope in trying to get back in and get the help I’m desperate for - I’m clearly not going to get it.
It sounds as if you have been treated most unfairly by the mental health services
False promises by the professionals are unforgivable
I do agree if you can go down the private route this can often be a better option
But please research the counsoler or psychotherapist thoroughly and ask them questions on their beliefs
And how experienced they are at working with your particular diagnosis
However if this is not an option for you try not to give up.
Ask your gp to refer you again
Insist on better communication and help.
If you feel you have been treated unfairly in any way
You can contact your local NHS patients advice and complaints service
They must help you put your complaint forward if you require them to do so
Everyone is entitled to a decent quality of care both mentally and physically
This is your right I hope you start to receive the support and care you deserve.
 
O

OoO

Member
Joined
Oct 22, 2020
Messages
8
Location
UK
I had looked up private therapists a couple of months ago, when I lived in London, and found a few that may be suitable and that did reduced rates for people on low income.
In the area I’m in now though, I reckon appropriate therapists may be hard to come by but I can certainly check.
I’ll talk to my gp too - and try to avoid getting my hopes up this time around so it doesn’t bother me so much if I’m just confronted with nonsense.
 
OCDguy

OCDguy

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Jun 13, 2016
Messages
1,580
My experience with the Mental Health Teams is sometimes you have to be able to articulate your situation to be heard, or sometimes they may take a route of deciding things amongst themselves. In my opinion you clearly are in need of support (but I'm no Doctor etc.) and perhaps stressing your situation to your Doctor may help put you back into the Mental Health System. You mentioned recently fleeing a Domestic Abuse situation, I am guessing that must have been a very traumatic situation to have found yourself in. How are you coping right now, is your situation/security stable etc. Are you able to do any kind of forward planning? :hug:
 
O

OoO

Member
Joined
Oct 22, 2020
Messages
8
Location
UK
My situation is stable at the moment and I should be moving out of temporary accommodation and into a council flat fairly soon. My only issue is that I’ll be living in a town or village, which could potentially be quite depressing.
As for forward planning, I’ve been thinking about plants, pets and paints :)
 
OCDguy

OCDguy

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Temporary accomodation probably isn't the best? I bet you can't wait to get a flat of your own :) How are you coping? :)
 
O

OoO

Member
Joined
Oct 22, 2020
Messages
8
Location
UK
Yeah I’ve been living in hotel rooms for nearly a couple of months now. It hasn’t been that bad. I guess I’m just taking things one day at a time, trying to keep my mind active and get out for air and exercise everyday.
 
I

I_Was_Punished

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Dec 8, 2019
Messages
89
Location
UK
i don't trust any of them, social workers, doctors. i just don't trust them. whenever i go to the mental health team (improving lives they claim) or to the GP i just feel this complete dread and wariness. i lost faith and trust a while ago now and i don't think i can change how i feel now. I think they just do a lot of useless talking to make it look like they are doing something but there is no substance to any of it.
 
Hello513

Hello513

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Jan 24, 2018
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2,283
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THE DEATH STAR.
i don't trust any of them, social workers, doctors. i just don't trust them. whenever i go to the mental health team (improving lives they claim) or to the GP i just feel this complete dread and wariness. i lost faith and trust a while ago now and i don't think i can change how i feel now. I think they just do a lot of useless talking to make it look like they are doing something but there is no substance to any of it.
In then end they are people, and make mistakes. I have found many in the psychological community can be dissmisve and lack empathy. I think the reason for this is because most of them have never experienced what it is like to have a mental illness so while they may have some understanding albeit not complete of the underlying causes they can't relate because they have never known what it feels like to go through this.
 
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