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Husband Sectioned

Unique1

Unique1

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Good news that you saw him :)

I guess it's small steps at the moment hey.
It's frustrating for you I inow,but at least he's now getting help.

So glad you have your sisters in law to help. It's important you keep your spirits up.:)

Wish you well
Unique xx
 
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RC2210

RC2210

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Hertfordshire
It was nice... Even for a moment. Hopefully tomorrow I can see him again and go from there.

The worst part is I talk to him all day every day... When we wake up, calls during the day whilst we both work, in the evening. Feels like I'm missing an arm... Or more aptly my heart.

Haven't been able to speak to a lot of my friends as much as I love them. We are only in our mid twenties and I think it's hard sometimes for them to comprehend why I stick with it. That's love I guess... When we got married we vowed sickness and health. Hoping that when I bring him a McDonald's tomorrow (got permission from the ward) that it will be a slightly longer visit and I can just be with him for a while.

Very strange without him; even the dog doesn't know what to do with herself!

Feeling more positive though. I got to tell him I love him and to me that was important :)
 
B

Betrayed

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:( reading your post i feel so much for you! I cant begin to imagine what you must be going through and have been through. Your one hell of a strong woman at such a young age to be doing this, and like the others have said, i hope that your husband understands in time that it was for the best but that your there.

I hope your visit goes well with him tomorrow, stay strong :hug: xx
 
Peaceful

Peaceful

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RC2210

I have read all this thread and most certainly wish you well.

Unfortunately in my lifetime have been sectioned six times, ie nobody can cope with me when I have got like this.

And also as with me, no matter how it hard it will seem for you right now, he is in the best place.

If he wasn't in hospital, then his behaviour would have got worse and worse and had an ever increasing debilitating effect on yourself too, because sadly when people are this unwell, nothing you could say or do, will really register and am certain everything you are saying is absolutely fair and sensible.

And yes, it may take some time whilst he is being stabilised in hospital for his mood etc to be back on a normal plane. And perhaps he may well being assessed long term as to more appropriate meds for him to be more stable on the outside by the time he is let out.

I totally feel for you to be going through all of this and yes it is unbelievably tough, and I know this part will seem incredibly incredibly difficult for you, but please do not take what he says or does for a while as gospel about how he feels about you, for a period he will not be in his right mind so I know it is pretty impossible not to, but try not to take what he is saying to heart - he atm isn't really aware of the words coming out of his mouth.

I think you yourself have been incredibly brave to be standing by him at this time and hopefully when he is better, he can totally totally appreciate this.

My own sisters and their families dismissed myself as a waste of space on my last section two years ago - I have not had the support of a partner for many years - but I felt so blessed that my parents stood by me.

It's tough too when the police get involved. In all my experience most police are really not very clever and very uneducated when dealing with people suffering extreme mental health and their attitudes to treating all like criminals when in all reality just not well - is also debilitating to all too.

I think you are incredibly brave and the fact you in mid twenties incredibly mature too - if I had had someone like you around at the time in my life, maybe my own future wouldn't have been so tough.

The hardest thing though which he has to come to terms with is he has a condition which is exacerbated greatly by stress and can as you seen lead to danger at times, so hopefully within the hospital,he can come to terms with how he has to live his life from this period onwards.

I think - as well as being on here - the fact that you have reconnected with some close friends during this period is absolutely massive for you too - because as the partner on the outside - you absolutely need and deserve all the emotional support from those who know you well too.

I sincerely hope it works out for the best - in particular for you.

In some respects this time may to a degree be harder for you - ie he has a lot of medical people monitoring his moods etc - whilst you are simply waiting and hoping for the real him to come back.

And that's the point really - he is not the person he is - at this moment in time.

His personality and behaviour are extreme because he is ill.

I know you know that. So very tough for you not to take the words he says to heart but absolutely be kind to yourself too and if the visits atm are too tough absolutely too - do whats best for you.

You are an incredibly brave young woman RC2210 and i sincerely hope todays visit goes well.

Certainly wishing you well absolutely.

Peaceful:hug1:
 
RC2210

RC2210

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Thank you for your very well thought out reply Peaceful.
He didn't want to see me today so it was encouraging to read some words of hope.

I am sorry to hear some of your family could not support you when you were going through similar issues. It's incredibly difficult - and it's good you still have some kind of support system. It's the issue with such a misunderstood issue I feel. I had a friend ask once why I kept with it and why I didn't walk away - my answer 'if someone you loved had cancer... Would you leave?' Of course they said no. I think they got the point that illness is illness regardless.

We have actually been incredibly lucky with the police in his case. A couple of the officers were there for the first call many years back... And many since! They knew exactly how to deal with him and made sure it was as peaceful as it could be. I was happy for that as they had officers with tazers present and I have seen them use force on him before. It kicks in some kind of protective instinct and it's incredibly hard to watch. We were lucky this time.

I will keep trying and turn up at that hospital every day he is there. Even if he doesn't want to see me, he will know I have been trying. I took Barry's comments on board too and have been making video logs so he can have them when he gets out. So he knows I was thinking of him.

It does get harder and harder the longer I can't see him, but I won't give up. And every one of you that has replied has given me the willpower to keep smiling.

You are all SPECTACULAR <3
 
Unique1

Unique1

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Thanks for letting us know how you got on today.
I'm sorry he didn't want to see you.

I'm hoping and wishing for his improvement and in turn his wishing to see you.

So glad the forum is helping you, you deserve support.
Best wishes
Unique xx
 
Jaminacaranda

Jaminacaranda

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Please keep us updated if you can. I feel terribly moved by your account and although I don't really think I can help of course I would be here for you online and I wish you all the best. I think you're amazing.
 
RC2210

RC2210

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I will of course :) hopefully with some better news to come.

This is the thing that has amazed me most about this forum. Everyone here is dealing with something; and yet everyone here is there for everyone else.

It's really inspiring and I thank you all again. If only everyone could be so understanding and encouraging xoxoxo
 
Peaceful

Peaceful

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RC2210 I hope in time he can slowly begin to reconnect with yourself, but yes how long this will take is anyone's guess unfortunately.

Some people on entering hospital can get better very quickly - in all my times in there - I once was knocked out by meds initially - quickly came to realise my head needed to change - because I truly didn't want to be in there.

Whereas others will almost feel they need to be in there as they need the time to get back on track with themselves and what truly matters for them in their lives.

If you think the forum is inspiring then maybe it's because many of us have been unwell and lost so many people that at one stage we truly felt were on our side - so the fact you are sticking around for your partner says volumes for your own character.

But I do hope you have someone on the outside who you can confide in and feel comfortable with too, because in RL it is so so tough to be dealing with this alone.

I know you have got us in cyber space but not totally quite the same thing I know.

I do hope though whilst you wait for his recovery - I do hope there are things you can do just for you - which can take your mind off this tough situation even if only for an hour or two.

I find things that can distract our attentions are very important when dealing with times such as you are dealing with right now.

Wishing you well.

Peaceful.:hug1:
 
B

Betrayed

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hoping things have been going ok in the last few days for you x:hug:
 
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