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How to keep a job with bpd?

D

Dagoon

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Dec 27, 2020
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Im currently working 25 hours 2 12.5 hour shifts. Im not coping to well at the moment mainly i think to the fact im transferring from agency to a permanent place. Its less flexible which is how I normally work. So im not in one place. I need help from fellow bpds to navigate this new world. Especially when we know the second someone says something offensive to me or negative im going to want to leave 😩
 
Tawny

Tawny

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England
I met someone with depression who was much older than me, and she said it helps her to have 2 part-time jobs. I think in the UK we get in to all sorts of taxing issues then and lose more of our money though.

You will harden up over time. Most stuff bounces right off of me now.
 
Signofthetimes

Signofthetimes

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Mar 1, 2021
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Hi Dagoon,
I want to leave when that happens, but I don't, or haven't. It's hard and sometimes I feel like I am tormenting myself, very stressful. Over the years I have stuck with it as I like my job. A year ago and before I would typically say I love my job.
Can't right now because am having stress from multiple life situations. I do love things about my job. Just lots to handle.
Maybe the continuation is part of the hurt that I give myself. I have often thought that, because I hurt.
Anyway, I tend to hold a lot in and being sensitive to everything makes it hard. Right now it is a lot harder.
I give myself a little help- comfort treatments like a daily hot bath with sea salts. I do this in the morning. It's a slow quiet start and I know by the end of the day, I won't do it.
I take short walks during my breaks, or go to grab coffee with a coworkers, or alone. Sometimes, I pick up coffee for a couple of co workers. This gives me a little pick up. Sometimes they give coffee to me. :)
I have a diffuser necklace so that I am able to breathe in Eucalyptus etc to help my mood, especially when triggered or when it drops. I constantly remind myself when low that what ever urgency I am feeling in a difficult moment will look differently later. Wait to act.
I have little treats like stress balls and little mochi toys. Sounds so simplistic but it helps during those harsh moments that could lead to regretful decisions.
Things are not the same for everyone, and I have been working at the same place for years, but don't feel like I belong in feeling a part of a group with my colleagues. I don't think they know that.
Still I can be a kind outsider.
I have other things that help me and can share a bit more.
I take a long walk at the end of most days. Sometimes I take a shower to "wash away the day" as someone once told me.
I am having a really hard time these past 2 months and it's scary considering I have had a hard year. Not confident right now, but am trying.
💗
 
Until

Until

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Feb 11, 2020
Messages
271
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uk
Im currently working 25 hours 2 12.5 hour shifts. Im not coping to well at the moment mainly i think to the fact im transferring from agency to a permanent place. Its less flexible which is how I normally work. So im not in one place. I need help from fellow bpds to navigate this new world. Especially when we know the second someone says something offensive to me or negative im going to want to leave 😩
I know what you mean, it's hard we are impulsive and any negative comments at work make us want to walk out. I struggle at work even thought I have managed to not walk out of this job yet, but have got angry, moody and all the other emotions due to my sensitivity of me thinking people don't like me or they say something to upset me.
 
D

Dwight7

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May 9, 2021
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TX
My goals at work are to work hard and be kind. Even if I hate the current position.

Regarding BPD, I’m constantly aware of how my coworkers and bosses perceive me. That’s why I come across as guarded at work. Actually I’m like this most of the time
 
stevie_sloth

stevie_sloth

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Mar 31, 2015
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I met someone with depression who was much older than me, and she said it helps her to have 2 part-time jobs. I think in the UK we get in to all sorts of taxing issues then and lose more of our money though.

You will harden up over time. Most stuff bounces right off of me now.
It's the same here in Australia. If you have one job, you don't pay tax on the first $18,600 you earn, but once you have a second job, ALL of that income is taxed at a high rate. Makes it not really worth the trouble.
 
I

IndigoCorkscrew

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Sep 2, 2021
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Uk
I work full time. I haven't told anyone I have BPD. It's the sort of environment where you would be shunned. The sad thing is there are posters and supportive messages in my workplace saying you can always speak to a manager or personnel officer in confidence and they will offer help and advice.

If I had stress through an external problem I'm sure they would help, because I would be a 'normal' person having regular difficulties. If I said I had a personality disorder and I was thinking very black thoughts I know what response I would get.
 
Signofthetimes

Signofthetimes

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I work full time. I haven't told anyone I have BPD. It's the sort of environment where you would be shunned. The sad thing is there are posters and supportive messages in my workplace saying you can always speak to a manager or personnel officer in confidence and they will offer help and advice.

If I had stress through an external problem I'm sure they would help, because I would be a 'normal' person having regular difficulties. If I said I had a personality disorder and I was thinking very black thoughts I know what response I would get.
I haven't nor will I ever tell anyone from work. Aside from my husband, I haven't told anyone in life. I know that what you said is truthful for me. There would only be judgment and no support. 💗
 
I

IndigoCorkscrew

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Uk
I haven't nor will I ever tell anyone from work. Aside from my husband, I haven't told anyone in life. I know that what you said is truthful for me. There would only be judgment and no support. 💗
Unfortunately those of us with mental illness, especially personality disorders, are seen as abnormal. People I deal with know I'm abnormal, people at work look at me as if they know something is not quite right. That look is crushing. The look in their eyes. They know but won't ask and I can't say. Been like that since I was a child.
 
Until

Until

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I haven't nor will I ever tell anyone from work. Aside from my husband, I haven't told anyone in life. I know that what you said is truthful for me. There would only be judgment and no support. 💗
i agree, people judge and talk about you and stay away from you if they know you are BPD, as those who don't have it or are not trained to help with it do not understand. the word Borderline brings up the word crazy in peoples minds. I would never tell anyone at work.
 
Until

Until

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Messages
271
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uk
My goals at work are to work hard and be kind. Even if I hate the current position.

Regarding BPD, I’m constantly aware of how my coworkers and bosses perceive me. That’s why I come across as guarded at work. Actually I’m like this most of the time
I definitely work hard but am not always kind but then again neither are other people to me.
 
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