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how to deal with constantly being seen as a villain who needs to be crushed when you don't even have bad intentions to anyone?

M

MedicalUnicorn

Member
Joined
Mar 27, 2020
Messages
22
Location
Venus
Hi,

This is something I noticed in college. I'm a foreigner here with unique looks and dress differently.
I notice many of my colleagues enjoy my misfortunes and think it's justice when I didn't even do anything to them.
random students and even staff glare at me and harass me as if I was a beast need to be taken down.
one time even one teacher clearly said something infant of the whole class to embarrass me when I got a bit nervous during presenation. It happened because I was harassed in the streets on my way to school but I didn't tell teacher.

lol my life is crazy
I don't have bad intentions and I'm not judgmental or hateful person
so why some people show so much hostility toward me and how to deal with it?
Is this a normal life lol?
 
S

Shay94

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 10, 2020
Messages
490
Location
Balga. Perth
There's not really much you can do except just ignore what they say or do. You can't help feeling nervous while doing a presentation, everyone feels that way. It shouldn't matter how you look or where you come from but some people in this world aren't always nice to others. The reason they do it is coz they're not happy with someone going on in their life so they be mean to others to make themselves feel better. I'm half aboriginal so never really had many people I could trust, and those that did make fun of me etc, I just ignored them & didn't show them any attention. They tried to keep going but when they realized I wasn't gonna pay attention to their crap, they eventually left me alone so that's just my way of handling bullies etc, hopefully it'll work for you
 
S

Social Experiment

Member
Joined
Apr 4, 2020
Messages
6
Location
United states
Punishment for a past life? Maybe,if you believe the new agers, you asked for this before you were born, to give you this hell in order to train and strengthen you?

Just ignore it. Think of yourself as the blacksmiths sword being sharpened and tested by fire. What doesn't kill you right?
 
T

TheHeartHasAVoice

Well-known member
Joined
Mar 14, 2020
Messages
465
Location
Australia
Hi there. Is there a very big contrast to the way you dress and the way the whole town/country dresses?
 
D

Draper

Guest
Hi,

This is something I noticed in college. I'm a foreigner here with unique looks and dress differently.
I notice many of my colleagues enjoy my misfortunes and think it's justice when I didn't even do anything to them.
random students and even staff glare at me and harass me as if I was a beast need to be taken down.
one time even one teacher clearly said something infant of the whole class to embarrass me when I got a bit nervous during presenation. It happened because I was harassed in the streets on my way to school but I didn't tell teacher.

lol my life is crazy
I don't have bad intentions and I'm not judgmental or hateful person
so why some people show so much hostility toward me and how to deal with it?
Is this a normal life lol?
Sometimes social anxiety can be like paranoia, if we get out of the diagnostic silos. Maybe people were glaring at you due to something about you, maybe you felt they were but they were just looking. Maybe there's a feedback loop where you get anxious/annoyed and start glaring around yourself and others wonder why. Maybe the teacher singled you out or maybe that's a level of joshing with people that just happens good naturedly. Only way to know I guess, is to check, either asking people on your own if you can, or in a suitable therapy process (if such exists).
 
M

MHFPokeplantz

Well-known member
Joined
Feb 17, 2021
Messages
495
Location
Brazil
Unfortunately I cant help you

But as much as possible, no need to feel blame. If youre not invading anybody space or offending, and respecting rules, youre NOT guilt
And as said, these behaviors are result of some judgement or rejection these ppl had in some point of life, and guess what, MANY ppl go through it, thats why so many are rude. Its NOT ABOUT YOU ok?

Best wishes
 
Empish

Empish

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 7, 2021
Messages
230
Location
Uk
It's not necessarily your dress or the fact that you are foreign, bullies pick on anyone but you are a prime target if you're a bit different. It is more likely because you are alone or not in a group/clique. They are less evolved and we have to learn not to take things personally although I know it's difficult.
I think it's important to keep 'the law of attraction' in mind so we don't attract more into our lives.
The idea that if we focus on bad things that have happened to us more will come to us. I'm not sure if it's true but worth considering.
There is a well know self help/personal growth book called 'The Four agreements' which talks about not taking things too personally which might help you, it did me.
 
Empish

Empish

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Joined
Apr 7, 2021
Messages
230
Location
Uk
I didn't realise it was so old until I sent it. Anyway, I found myself here so others might too and the advice I gave will always be relevant.
 
M

MHFPokeplantz

Well-known member
Joined
Feb 17, 2021
Messages
495
Location
Brazil
Why are people responding to a year old thread made by someone who likely doesn't even comes here anymore...?
Because it may help others?? Or the person if it eventually comes
 
BlackChalice47

BlackChalice47

ACCOUNT CLOSED
Joined
May 16, 2021
Messages
185
Location
Mason
Sounds like part of this might be paranoia. Are you sure they aren't just joking? Seems a bit odd and unprofessional for a teacher to behave like that unless he wasn't intending it as an insult.

I can relate though. I struggle to push myself to socialize due to a recurring delusion that my friends secretly don't like me. It's almost never as true as I think it is but it isn't an unfounded fear because my behavior has costed me friends for most of my life. On the other hand, I often underestimate how understanding people can be.
 
Empish

Empish

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 7, 2021
Messages
230
Location
Uk
It might be paranoia but there's every reason to believe it's not. Bullies are everywhere. Just because you haven't been on the receiving end of it doesn't make everybody else paranoid.
It's bad enough having to go through those kinds of experiences without someone then telling you you're paranoid.

And if you think professionals are any different then you can think again.
 

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