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I_Want_Inner_Peace

I_Want_Inner_Peace

Member
Joined
Jan 1, 2018
Messages
15
Location
USA
To this day, I still struggle with what is okay to disclose about myself in a social setting. What's the difference between a toxic person that everyone wants to cut ties from, and a mentally ill person who gets PSAs dedicated to them saying "end the stigma, reach out to them"? Like I feel there is a bitter irony there, we want to raise awareness and work to have better support systems. But at the same time, we have people saying they've had really bad experiences being friends or dating people with anxiety,depression, BPD, etc. Or maybe there is a difference between people who refuse to get help/better and people who do? Perhaps I should just say yes I have issues, but I try to keep a grounded perspective of life, myself, and the people I interact with.
 
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Y939

Guest
It's hard, people want to support someone who is dealing with their personal struggles without affecting others. Someone who's anxious, but kind and friendly. Someone with depression, who's kind and friendly. They reach out and declare support when the sufferer has an agreeable sense of humour and a pleasing character. They feel differently when the sufferer's behaviour impacts other people, when they get angry at others, aggressive, accusatory, or too withdrawn. People get uncomfortable then and pull away. I think it comes down to, is this person friendly and fun despite that illness? Or negative, brooding, and unfun? I'm not sure which way I come across. I can be both with my friends depending on the day. I assume my darkness is unlikable, and I have so much darkness. I feel like I have to create sunshine in myself where there isn't any.
 
I_Want_Inner_Peace

I_Want_Inner_Peace

Member
Joined
Jan 1, 2018
Messages
15
Location
USA
yeah I see your point...and I think people have sympathy for people who went through something traumatic or a lot. something situational....But they have no sympathy for those always crying or say their opinions about things in a negative way. something that has to do with mindset and emotional stability. I totally understand that negative energy is unhealthy to be around but it can be difficult for people with PTSD/CPTSD and BPD for example to have a normal/stable social life. There will be times where they will have a mental breakdown or an anxiety attack and some people will be like "what the heck?"
 
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Y939

Guest
I don't have BPD or bipolar, etc, but I do feel very unstable and emotional in a childlike way, and I feel like I have to put on an act so I don't come across that way with people who don't really know me. I think with acquaintances the pressure is worse, like with workmates. True friends stick around and love you even when things are tense. One of my best friends has a good friend with bipolar and she admits it's difficult at times, but the bond is strong. It's just finding that connection. With acquaintances I think a mask is expected, the "best self," rather than the 100% authentic self. I feel that acquaintances and more casual friendships can be fickle and easily broken, they depend on surface interaction, not deep interaction, at least a lot of the time I think.
 
I_Want_Inner_Peace

I_Want_Inner_Peace

Member
Joined
Jan 1, 2018
Messages
15
Location
USA
yeah It definately also depends if people will click with you on interests/hobbies you're right
 
Z

Zoleyj1

Well-known member
Joined
May 8, 2016
Messages
72
Location
Sydney, Australia
Here's what I believe are some of the obstacles to reducing stigma
1/ People often fear what they don't know/ understand
2/ Many mental illnesses have been negatively portrayed in the media , giving false ideas about the illness
3/ Some people have a bad experience with a person they discover has a particular illness and from that they conclude that all people with that illness are 'toxic'...
4/ To accept someone has a mental illness it helps to try and understand them. For someone to take the time to truly understand you they are probably going to be someone close , who cares about you.
5/ It's a lot easier to just point the finger/, blame than try to understand why someone behaved 'badly' or has 'issues'.
Which is why I believe in only confiding in my most trusted.
In the past I have opened up and had my illness used against me .
So I would personally only divulge any kind of issues with those close to me.
 
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