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how many people read and dont post?

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kurtov

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Seriously, theres alot of people on here who read whats being posted but dont post anything themselves. its to be expected but come on, 53 views on a thread with someones asking for help during a crutial moment in his life and no reply?? jesus, what if this mans last resort is this god forsaken forum and he will either sink or float depending on if some mindless sufer should take a minute and think to help him? well then, the answer would be, he's fucked

i understand that theres alot of people in the world, and more relavently, there are many using this site right now. but i guess im just laughing that society has come down to this point, where even some strangers lurking on the internet dont have the capacity to understand a true persons thoughts.

so you read my post, will you respond, or keep mindlessly surfing?

-Weow
 
unlucky

unlucky

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I'll read your post and tell you I think your being extremely insensitive!! If you look at the time your posting its in the middle of the night and where they may be a lot of people who can't sleep (me being one of them) its not exactly the busiest time for people to be on the forum.
The majority of people on here are sufferers of some form of mental health and speaking for myself, there are so many different posts and so many different areas of mental illness that it would be impossible to answer every post you read.
I reply to people I think I can be of some help to or offer some useful advice to. This isn't a medical forum so if someone is desperate all we can advise is to get some professional help because if we try to do something the results could be more catastrophic than if we don't. Saying the wrong thing could tilt someone over the edge. This is a forum for discussion, not a cure to mental health and I resent being told by someone who has just joined that I'm selfish for not replying to every thread I read.
Okay rant over.
 
intelgal

intelgal

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I often read posts and so not reply.. simply because I am sure that I am not the best person to offer advice or support but I read because maybe I am that person on some things.
 
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eternaljourney

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I post depending on my mood, when i'm livelier I want to communicate more. It does get very lonely when we can't sleep and feel a bit desperate. Maybe you could find a site for insomniacs, that'd be a place with lot's of people around at night too!?
 
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Apotheosis

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so you read my post, will you respond, or keep mindlessly surfing?
This isn't the Samaritans - it is worth reading the Disclaimer.

http://www.mentalhealthforum.net/forum/showthread.php?t=1567

What level of therapeutic & healing support can an on-line forum be? Realistically. If someone is in such a critical state - then they need proper assistance - they should ring an ambulance, or involve services. It isn't rocket science, most the responses are stock - "Hang in there, you are not alone, Go & see you GP as a first point of call, print out what you have written, get some tablets, ect ect ect". What are people meant to say?

If I get run over by car - I'm not going to drag myself home, & log into a general medical forum; to ask what to do? & then get shirty when no one replies. I didn't think any of us on here were personally responsible for the well being & recovery of others! - we're not!

This question also raises important questions as to what is best 'therapy'?

I have always found that chatting very openly with others in an environment of trust, about the in depth content of my 'psychotic' experiences, to have been the best help. It has taken 20 years to get 10 sessions with a psychologist who won't talk about those things. If I talk about such things on here; & alternative perspectives, it appears that by most; such things are not up for much discussion.

Group dynamics/psychology/politics denote that there will be a herd mentality, to a degree. Rather like a Monkey troop - people side with others to promote their own views, agendas & perspectives. I have had to leave another MH forum; that I had been posting on for years; because of such dynamics - & the very unhealthy nature of them - such is the human animal.

In all truth - how much of peoples mental distress is not almost entirely caused by such things in the first place?

Personally I have been questioning the purpose & benefit of continuing to post on MH forums. This is the only MH forum I still post on. At one time I have posted on around 6. I haven't been on here much either. I have been considering finding other forums to post on - maybe a psychology forum or others. Somewhere which can have slightly more depth to the conversations. In all honesty; it is unhealthy to spend too much time on-line & on forums - it can never be a proper substitute for 'real life' relationships.

I don't mean to sound heartless (& I'm not), But I get tired of hearing the same old stuff about meds, symptoms & all the other spiel. It isn't hard to run simple Google searches on med side effects, med reactions & withdrawals, & searches on symptoms, & other peoples experiences. I don't see much sense in the continual asking of the same questions about MH symptoms; & med effects - to a group of people, most of whom aren't medically trained - & whose stock response is 'we are not Doctors, no one on this site can give you an authoritative diagnosis or medical opinion' - which paradoxically, also doesn't stop a lot of people; telling others what meds to take - & telling them to take meds; which if they aren't Doctors; I don't see that they should be doing in the first place. But still - that's my opinion.
 
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Apotheosis

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I'd like to add; that the practical & sensible actions to take are not complicated or hard to understand. They may in practise be very hard in some cases to do (& access) - but they are simple.

How many druggies do we have on this site? - habitual users of cannabis & other substances - & people who abuse alcohol - it's a lot. It doesn't need a degree to realise that substance abuse isn't healthy!. Especially for people with MH conditions.

I know about eating disorders; but the simple fact is that whether someone has an eating disorder of not - it is a simple fact that a good nutritious diet will make you feel better. Exercise will also make you feel better.

I have strong views on meds - I am battling to get off them. It should be a free choice as to what people take. There are many alternative methods of recovery - but often very hard to access.

I have struggled with all these issues around my MH. Even within the realms of 'mental illness', I think I have experienced an extreme end of the continuum. There are no magic wands or easy answers. But there are tangible, practical things that can be done to improve things. That doesn't negate the seriousness or horrific nature of some MH conditions; but, conversely; nor does it negate what will help. But I am astounded at the behaviour & attitudes of some of the people I know in my own life & that of some people on-line.
 
unlucky

unlucky

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Its strange Apo, because my husband and I were having a discussion about this the other night. I, like yourself find that talking openly about my problems on a forum such as this has been therapeutic for me and has given me a bit more insight to how I've been feeling at any given time, but my husband says I've become worse because I'm getting too embroiled in things other people are saying.
So is it good or bad? Who knows!! As you say it is only (and rightly so) peoples personal experiences and opinion which are being viewed on this forum and these differ greatly from person to person.
I do think a kind of philosophical forum would be good for you because you obviously have some very interesting views but there aren't that many people knowledgeable in the topics you like to discuss (i'm not saying theres none because thats patently not true) on this forum. Most of the things you like to discuss are way way over my head and I or anyone else who doesn't understand don't think I'm particularly stupid, I maybe just don't have the same thirst for knowledge as you !!
 
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Apotheosis

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Its strange Apo, because my husband and I were having a discussion about this the other night. I, like yourself find that talking openly about my problems on a forum such as this has been therapeutic for me and has given me a bit more insight to how I've been feeling at any given time, but my husband says I've become worse because I'm getting too embroiled in things other people are saying.
The people in my life almost unanimously tell me that I shouldn't spend so much time chatting on-line; especially on MH forums. There are a few ways of looking at this & many sides. They do have a point; the more I focus on 'problems', negatives, things which are missing, the things I can do nothing about ect - the unhealthier it is. I have been trying to 'switch off' more, focus on positives, things I do have in my life, & to be grateful for. The more that I can relax & 'let go', then the better. MH forums do not always allow that. So I have been turning the computer off more & doing more of what I enjoy; & formally relaxing; with basic meditation & other things.

There is also the general nature of 'mental illness' being a taboo subject - the general orthodox view is that people shouldn't discus their 'MH experiences' - especially around 'psychosis'. I totally disagree with this view. It is an attitude endemic for many reasons - but the fact remains that 'mental illness' is a Taboo subject & people frown upon talking openly about it. This needs to change.

Things also come down to people not understanding - but misunderstanding can come from the 'mentally ill' themselves, as much as it can from the 'normals'. I have made on-line friendships & had some great conversations on-line. But there are also many I have drifted away from, & some I have fallen out with. Some days I feel good posting & chatting on-line. Other days I can get into a right state from it. If I end up in an anxious/angry state as a result of on-line interactions, then it just isn't healthy.

So is it good or bad? Who knows!! As you say it is only (and rightly so) peoples personal experiences and opinion which are being viewed on this forum and these differ greatly from person to person.
Both good & bad. In a general sense, I don't think it is about the amount of time spent on-line that is that bad. It's what we are doing when we are on-line. If someone spends their time looking at porn, gambling, & on inane chat sites - then it's not so healthy. If they rather lean new things, actively & constructively participate in forums; & better themselves - then it can be good.

I do think a kind of philosophical forum would be good for you because you obviously have some very interesting views but there aren't that many people knowledgeable in the topics you like to discuss (I'm not saying there's none because that's patently not true) on this forum. Most of the things you like to discuss are way way over my head and I or anyone else who doesn't understand don't think I'm particularly stupid, I maybe just don't have the same thirst for knowledge as you !!
Thank you for saying. Philosophy & certain other subjects are of interest. Before MH forums I went on philosophy forums for a few years. But they lost my interest. I reached certain conclusions & got bored with the endless debate without concrete conclusions. There are many highly intelligent people on-line. I have spoken with some very interesting & highly intelligent people. But the reality of this is, I suppose, that I end up being too 'cerebral'. I sit in chair, smoking too much, in front of a screen, with a pc purring away beside me. When, all things considered - there are a hundred & one things that would probably be more healthy & rewarding for me to be doing with my time. It can be a great comfort to sit indoors in the 'on-line World', & not involve myself with what is 'out there'. I suppose it is a matter of Balance.
 
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anastasia

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i quite often read every new post but don't reply. simply cos i have nothing to say or i feel i can't add anything. or even because it's just too hard for me to respond.

so what if lots of pepole read and don't reply? It's the ones that do that make the difference. not everyone will respond to everything otherwise we'd all be here all day. for instance, i've been to this post 3 times before i've actually replied to it.
 
unlucky

unlucky

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It is a matter of balance - this is the only forum I've ever posted on and I've never been involved in any chatrooms. I came on here to try to make sense of how and feeling and for me it seems to have worked. Again there are bad days when I wish I hadn't come on because I feel so bad for others in different situations to myself that I'm frustrated I can't help, but then there are more days when I feel like I've made a bit of a difference to someone. Hope that doesn't sound sanctimonious!!
Personally I blame my daughter for getting a laptop!! Before she got it I didn't spend a quarter of the time online because I had to sit at a computer desk, now I can sit on the couch I'm never off it!!
I hope you find a site which suits your needs - have you ever thought about maybe going for a degree or the like through open university? I know its a bit pointless but from what I gather these things are free or government funded in a lot of cases and it would give you a focus and you could still be on the computer!!
 
unlucky

unlucky

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Thats a fair point too ana, most of the times I do reply to something I'll go into it a few times before I do reply cos I'm thinking of what I'm going to write or sometimes I'll be looking at something then get a private mail and have to go back to it so the views certainly don't mean that 58 people have viewed it - it could be 5 people who've viewed it 12 times each!!
 
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eternaljourney

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Forums to me are about not feeling alone. You can take any illness and spend time on a forum discussing and analysing and trying to support others and it will all come round in a circle. I went through a major operation and used a forum for that regularly, I knew all the treatments and meds and side effects. It all came round again in a cycle and with the same concerns and questions.
Personally I think age brings this with any subject, i get the same feeling sometimes from face to face interaction. But isn't this just life itself, knowledge brings greater awareness and at some point tells us to move on.
People will always differ and agree and sometimes disagree, like everything in life in any circumstance we need a break.

Eternal x
 
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Apotheosis

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It is a matter of balance - this is the only forum I've ever posted on and I've never been involved in any chatrooms. I came on here to try to make sense of how and feeling and for me it seems to have worked. Again there are bad days when I wish I hadn't come on because I feel so bad for others in different situations to myself that I'm frustrated I can't help, but then there are more days when I feel like I've made a bit of a difference to someone. Hope that doesn't sound sanctimonious!!
No, not at all, it sounds healthy.

I hope you find a site which suits your needs - have you ever thought about maybe going for a degree or the like through open university? I know its a bit pointless but from what I gather these things are free or government funded in a lot of cases and it would give you a focus and you could still be on the computer!!
I have been dabbling with the idea of a degree for years, I'm unsure to whether I want to take on that commitment at the present time.

I have been enjoying this site more today.
 
Q

quality factor

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Hi Apo..what makes today's posts more enjoyable than other days?
Is it the content of the posts or your mood?

People come to this forum with varying experiences of mental health, whether it be personal or family or friend orientated. Some people come for advice because they are frightened and yes they have to meet with the now standard answer...sorry we can't help you try and see your GP, for safety reasons.

I feel this site can help to form on-line friendships which can be helpful when one is feeling very low, at least you know that someone may be there who can read your post and understand your stress and make a helpful contribution to the way you feel. A reply to your post may not come when you want it to, but in my experience when it does , it helps and at that time may be a comfort.

There are occaisions when the forum seems to be used to push a persons
ideoligies at every opportunity, I don't find this aspect helpful and in time has become boring and repetative. In some cases the content of these posts seems to be veering away from mental health and indeed of late is way above my head....but at least I can switch my computer off and come back another time. In some instances what I call 'banter' between forum members is quite comical and has provided a bit of light relief..some of today's posts are an example.

I enjoy the posts on 'current affairs in mental health', and find them.useful and informative.

I come to the forum regularly, I don't always read everything and therefore only reply where I feel I can be helpful to somebody or if I want to contribute to a particular thread which is of interest.

The forum has helped me through some difficult times over the past 9 months. If people want to surf the net and 'lurk' on this site without taking part then that is their priviledge.
QF.
 
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ramboghettouk

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Can i ask what do people make of day centres, i don't know if it helps mixing with people who can't be supportive because they've got so many problems, if i say anything like that to a mental health worker they get nasty the usual response is to stand up for the rights of the day centre people and in effect attack my right to an opinion

On the other hand "normal"people or whatevers the right word don't want to know and don't understand, also a day centre is warm in winter, try finding somewhere free like that
 
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