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How have people let you down?

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MeAndMyDepression

MeAndMyDepression

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When someone says they'll call you by a certain date, they never do.

When someone says they'll get back to you, they never do.

I recently filled out a rather lengthy application to do volunteer work. After the interview, they said they'll call me by the end of the month to let me know their decision one way or the other. They never did call me.

If you ask a question in a text message, the recipient never answers it.

If you "ping" a person in a text message, saying something like "thinking of you," they never respond.

"Road rage" is an extreme example of how a person lets you down.
 
JessisMe

JessisMe

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Probably when you show kindness to other people and they turn it around to make it something evil and get you into trouble for it.

When you do for others and they don’t appreciate it and turn on you and do bad things to you because they want to.

When people don’t see me for who and what I am and instead take other people’s (bad) word for it.

I really don’t put myself out much irl for these reasons anymore. xo, j
 
LORD BURT

LORD BURT

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I have also been on the receiving end of this inept social behaviour many many times.
 
TooMuchPain

TooMuchPain

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\_(ツ)_/
i wish I knew in the beginning that asking for help gets you nowhere. The system is grossly too little too late. And if you don’t drift away from me. I’m probably gonna find a way to drift away from you. I’m seriously afraid to go and try to be around real people at this point. It never works out well and I’ve burnt a lot of bridges already. I honestly don’t know how I would handle knowing for real that I will never have a real life friend again. I try not to think about that.

its also frustrating when I have many people in my life waiting (at a distance) for me to get better. They don’t understand that if I do get better I’m sure I won’t want to be around them as a safety measure for myself. If you were willing to watch me fall down before… you will watch the show again. I just can’t imagine being willing to subject myself to that again.

What scares me most is that I think its actually getting easier for me to be alone. If I ever figure that out, I’ll never go outside again.
 
B

bebernipes

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Gee, I hate it too, waiting for someone to get in touch and it never happens. But well, one of the things that makes me very upset is to see customers treating the attendants and salespeople badly. I hate rudeness.
 
U

Usedup

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People have let me down in a myriad of ways but I guess I've let other people down too.
 
Signofthetimes

Signofthetimes

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Being insulted while helping

Criticized for something I didn’t do or think about.

Criticism for stepping away from something from someone not helping at all.

Contacting not to say hello, but to ask for something or to make demands or attempt to force “advice”.

Having someone argue with me when I have little or no idea WTF they are talking about

Sending a message or gift and getting no response.

Listening to someone for an hour and when I talk they interrupt

Being left out, but expected to allow in

Dismissiveness
 
LunaBloodmist

LunaBloodmist

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When you try to be cheerful, and get yelled at for smiling. When they stop responding, or tell you they won't respond. When you just want to know they're thinking of you. All the things they promise they'll get for you, but when they've got the money, you didn't get anything because you didnt ask for it? When I'm out....I look at things they may like, what would cheer them up? It doesn't have to be expensive. Just wanna know that you think of me.
 
S

Sugaree

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When I am treated unkindly by anyone. I usually freeze up,don’t know how to respond and avoid those people. After obsessing about it, I finally forgive and let it go.
 
B

Blues47

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I think the consistent pleasure people have taken in making me feel bad is a letdown but it's been happening for 40+ years so I don't think it's anybody's personal failing just a quirk of humanity.
 
A

anodyne

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I think of it less as people having let me down and more how I've let myself or others down. I guess my personal view of things is that people are doomed to endlessly hurt each other, often without intending to and usually without any real justification, just as a result of our limited perspective. I can think of many regrets in my life where I've wronged others in stupid, thoughtless ways, so I couldn't hold it too much against those I might say have wronged me. Even so, there are several people no longer in my life who I have a deep resentment for because of how they've treated me, but even they are not really bad people, and i know i wasn't blameless in whatever occurred. If anything, I find the animosity I feel towards these people to be a deep personal failing on my part. But I'm more of a self-critical person anyway, so I usually don't focus on what other people do wrong but how I probably caused whatever negative outcome came about.
 
A

Alexander Ypsilantis

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When someone says they'll call you by a certain date, they never do.

When someone says they'll get back to you, they never do.

I recently filled out a rather lengthy application to do volunteer work. After the interview, they said they'll call me by the end of the month to let me know their decision one way or the other. They never did call me.

If you ask a question in a text message, the recipient never answers it.

If you "ping" a person in a text message, saying something like "thinking of you," they never respond.

"Road rage" is an extreme example of how a person lets you down.
It's discouraging, no question. There are a lot of impolite people out there.

A bigger discouragement is people who I thought were very good friends totally losing interest in keeping in touch. I had close friends who I thought would be interested enough in me to share my life-and want me to share theirs-to our last days. I had one very good friend in HS and we stayed in touch through college and initially when we got into the workforce. The last time I saw him was at our HS 20 year reunion-and we had a really great time that night. I tried to arrange get-togethers in the year following that reunion, but he always had something going on. After 3 attempts I thought I'd back off and let him contact me when he had time available. That was 29 years ago this year and I'm still waiting. I guess our friendship meant a lot more to me than it did to him?
 
MeAndMyDepression

MeAndMyDepression

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It's discouraging, no question. There are a lot of impolite people out there.

A bigger discouragement is people who I thought were very good friends totally losing interest in keeping in touch. I had close friends who I thought would be interested enough in me to share my life-and want me to share theirs-to our last days. I had one very good friend in HS and we stayed in touch through college and initially when we got into the workforce. The last time I saw him was at our HS 20 year reunion-and we had a really great time that night. I tried to arrange get-togethers in the year following that reunion, but he always had something going on. After 3 attempts I thought I'd back off and let him contact me when he had time available. That was 29 years ago this year and I'm still waiting. I guess our friendship meant a lot more to me than it did to him?
I'm sorry for you, Alexander. I thought I had a good friend, too, whom I met at the behavioral health ward in the hospital we were both in. We texted each other for quite some time. Then she texted me saying that my texts to her were triggering her. I backed off. Then after about four months had passed, I texted her again, saying only "thinking of you." Nothing. I felt slightly betrayed.
 
A

Alexander Ypsilantis

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I'm sorry for you, Alexander. I thought I had a good friend, too, whom I met at the behavioral health ward in the hospital we were both in. We texted each other for quite some time. Then she texted me saying that my texts to her were triggering her. I backed off. Then after about four months had passed, I texted her again, saying only "thinking of you." Nothing. I felt slightly betrayed.
Texting is too in the moment and as a consequence too easily ignored. All these social media things like Facebook, Twitter, Texting and so on have worked against having close friends. Look at how many people have hundreds of folks on their Friends list and many of them they never see in real life-if they've ever met them at all.

You and I are of an age when meeting friends meant actually being in someone's physical presence and interacting with them over time. It was social interaction that usually had substance and often stood the test of time. It was real, not virtual. That's why losing someone who you had a relationship like that with is particularly disappointing. They're not just dismissing a tweet or a text, they're dismissing the influence you brought into each other's lives.

I see no recovery in the lost relationship with my friend which I illustrated. Too many years have gone by, too much has happened in my life and likely his as well. I thought that our HS 20 year reunion would reset a friendship which had been place aside to some extent by the demands of both our Educations and then establishing ourselves as professionals early in our career. We'd gotten over those humps, we're past the demanding years with our kids and were facing up to that long slog towards retirement. If we could have started then by just a golf game every few weeks, meeting up for lunch in a convenient halfway-place now and then or something along those lines it would have been great. I tried, but he genuinely was not interested enough to follow-through. And that is regretful, but it is what it is. Life goes on.
 

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