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How do I manage this and stay in one piece?

A

angelflower

Well-known member
Joined
May 7, 2017
Messages
634
Briefly speaking, I have an infection down below and am getting treated for an infection. My GP also wants me to get a check done at the GUM clinic. I didn't see the need to as my husband is the only person I've been with. I told my husband and he has no symptoms, but he did confess that he'd slept with an escort worker probably a year or so ago.

I am devastated. I feel suicidal enough as it is, without this. He feels guilty at the thought he might have given me something. Part of me thinks if he feels that guilty then he shouldn't have done it in the first place. Though I do understand he has 'needs'.
 
C

claude

Guest
omg angelflower i am so sorry. You must feel so hurt and betrayed. It was very reckless of your husband to sleep with someone else without being tested and using protection when then sleeping with you. That was very selfish of him and not right that he put your health at risk without telling you. I am glad he is at least being honest now that you are having to be treated for this infection.

I imagine it will take some time for you to process this experience, be kind to yourself and focus on you and what you want and need in regards to this situation. I imagine it will take time to heal.

I hope another poster with more useful things to say/experience will come along but i just wanted to let you know i have read your post and my heart goes out to you, it sounds a very complex situation for you
 
A

angelflower

Well-known member
Joined
May 7, 2017
Messages
634
omg angelflower i am so sorry. You must feel so hurt and betrayed. It was very reckless of your husband to sleep with someone else without being tested and using protection when then sleeping with you. That was very selfish of him and not right that he put your health at risk without telling you. I am glad he is at least being honest now that you are having to be treated for this infection.

I imagine it will take some time for you to process this experience, be kind to yourself and focus on you and what you want and need in regards to this situation. I imagine it will take time to heal.

I hope another poster with more useful things to say/experience will come along but i just wanted to let you know i have read your post and my heart goes out to you, it sounds a very complex situation for you
Bless you Claude. I really appreciate your reply. xxxx
 
Fairy Lucretia

Fairy Lucretia

Well-known member
Forum Guide
Joined
Apr 9, 2011
Messages
33,189
Location
Magical fairy wonderland xxxx
im so sorry
this topic is a bit grown up for me but i couldn't ignore your post

you must feel so awful ,im so sorry for you ,i really hope you get through this
im sure the forum will be there to support you
lots of love Lu x
 
A

angelflower

Well-known member
Joined
May 7, 2017
Messages
634
im so sorry
this topic is a bit grown up for me but i couldn't ignore your post

you must feel so awful ,im so sorry for you ,i really hope you get through this
im sure the forum will be there to support you
lots of love Lu x
Aww bless you. And thanks :)
 
S

scarecrowsyn

Member
Joined
Jun 4, 2018
Messages
5
Location
Canada
I can only imagine a feeling of cold emptiness (I've been betrayed before, too, and that's what comes to mind).

I'm so sorry to hear about this. Sex is not truly a 'need' (I have gone for extended periods without it due to emotional and physical complications, so it certainly can be done). If you do ultimately forgive him that's truly great (forgiveness is noble and can be healing for the person wronged), but don't let someone else invalidate or marginalize your feelings by making excuses.

Whatever else happens, know that you've got some strangers out here who are hoping you can start to feel better.
 
Mayflower7

Mayflower7

Well-known member
Moderator
Joined
Jan 4, 2013
Messages
9,861
Location
England
Briefly speaking, I have an infection down below and am getting treated for an infection. My GP also wants me to get a check done at the GUM clinic. I didn't see the need to as my husband is the only person I've been with. I told my husband and he has no symptoms, but he did confess that he'd slept with an escort worker probably a year or so ago.

I am devastated. I feel suicidal enough as it is, without this. He feels guilty at the thought he might have given me something. Part of me thinks if he feels that guilty then he shouldn't have done it in the first place. Though I do understand he has 'needs'.


Hi Angel,
I'm really sorry this has happened, it is best to get yourself checked out at the GUM clinic.
I spent some time while nursing in this type of clinic, they are usually really nice and everything is confidential.
Here to listen.
Your husband has needs yes, but he has put you at risk.
Hope you can get thru this, do phone the Samaritans if you need someone to talk to in confidence.
Take care
 
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