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How do I cope with loss

N

Nelle_joy97

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Apr 24, 2017
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My grandpa passed away just 2 days ago, and it's very hard to go on through the day. I was never really close with my grandpa and I felt distant from him throughout my whole life. I felt like I resented him for so long because he was difficult to talk to and connect with. I feel full of regret now, because I feel like I wasn't the granddaughter he deserved... I just feel alone and I don't know how to cope with this loss. I don't really feel like turning to anyone, because when I do I just don't feel truly comforted. I just feel empty and I don't want to do anything. I don't know what to do. I don't like how I have to pretend like I'm okay on the outside... I hate how I have to sit in class and act like everything is okay. Even though I wasn't close to my grandpa, I loved him very much. I feel like I neglected him and it's hard to accept I'll never see or hear from him again.
 
Mayflower7

Mayflower7

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Hi,
I'm so very sorry for your loss, I was 14 when my grandad died. It's such a shock when we lose somebody we love.
Try to talk to your parents, your a child and you did your best, you didn't neglect him.
Have you got any friends that can support you?
Time is a healer, things will get easier.
I'm here to listen.
Take care
 
Poopy Doll

Poopy Doll

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When you say you weren't the granddaughter he deserved and that you neglected him, I think you are being too harsh on yourself. As the adult, he is the one who should have been easier to communicate with. He was the adult. He defined your relationship.

It's hard for you because you would have preferred a more close relationship. But that wasn't the reality. So you have to accept the reality and that's what is hard for you. Suddenly he's gone and all possibility of making more of the relationship is out the window. Again, he was the adult and was responsible for how things were. It was not your fault.
 
N

Nelle_joy97

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Joined
Apr 24, 2017
Messages
4
Thank you for your kind words and support! I find that turning to my dad is helping me cope a little bit easier. As for my friends, I've only told a couple. I feel like they are trying their best, but I don't think they know how to comfort me or what to say, which is understandable. I know time heals all wounds, so I'm trying my best to get through this.
 
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Nelle_joy97

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Apr 24, 2017
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Thank you for your input, I appreciate it. The fact that he's gone truly breaks my heart because I guess a part of me wanted a better relationship with him and knowing I never will just hurts. I know that I shouldn't put myself down in this situation, so I'm going to try my best not to.
 
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