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How do I cope with being stupid?

F

Frosty1

Former member
Sorry, I didn't know where to post this.

Since my childhood, people have called me stupid. Mostly classmates and teachers. I know some might say that I shouldn't listen to the negative things people said, but I agree with them. I'm just trying to finally accept who I am as a person, whether it's how I am or how I look. It's not easy, but I'm going to start trying.

I was never a great student in school. My grades actually became worse as I got older. I remember one teacher describing me as slow because of how terrible I did in his class. I always had trouble concentrating on things. When I was younger, I didn't like to read because every time I tried reading, I would have to read sentences over again. I always thought about other things instead of the book in front of me. I love reading now, but I still don't read a lot. I also have this problem when trying to focus on other things. Watching a movie, playing video games... everything. My mind travels somewhere else and I forget things very easily.

I was also never good at learning things. I tried teaching myself a few things, like art or German. But I even have a lot of trouble with that. I actually had a crazy idea of going to an art school because art is the only thing I'm kind of good at, but I feel like I'm not good enough to actually make this a reality. I told a psychiatrist once about wanting to go to an art school, and he sort of laughed at the idea. Now I feel embarrassed every time I think of that memory.

As an adult, I was told that I might have dyscalculia. I fully believe I have it because I don't understand math at all. Counting money and telling time is already hard for me to do. So in school I was really, really bad at math. I got called stupid for this as well. I can't change it. This is another reason I'm trying to accept all of this.

I'm not doing anything with my life. I have no plans for the future because I don't exactly have a future. Focusing on anything is hard because I daydream too much. I have trouble organizing things, especially my life, and keeping up with other people. I tried focusing on my education again, but I know that it's hopeless. I had dreams about going to a university, but I'm afraid that this will never happen.

Sorry if I repeated anything here. I know I complain a lot about this. I just want to find a way to live with the person I am, even if I really hate myself.
 
Tawny

Tawny

Well-known member
Forum Guide
Joined
Nov 10, 2019
Messages
13,312
Location
England
I'm stupid often, i think it is something i just have to accept. I know my strengths and weaknesses.

Nobody has called me stupid though but i have been called so many hurtful names by very important people, very smart people (supposedly).

Most of us can be divided into groups based on our personal skills and talents. There are people who are creative (writing, drama, art, music) and then people who are good with science, maths, problem solving.

There are the carers, the listeners, the talkers, the people who are good with their hands and can make things.

We are all different and it is essential that we are. We all have our own special talents that nobody else has. A doctor could not be a nurse, because they would not have the special talents to be a nurse.
 
Tawny

Tawny

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Joined
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13,312
Location
England
Art

There are many things you can do with that talent
Do you want to create art or help others create art? or both
 
F

Frosty1

Former member
I'm stupid often, i think it is something i just have to accept. I know my strengths and weaknesses.

Nobody has called me stupid though but i have been called so many hurtful names by very important people, very smart people (supposedly).

Most of us can be divided into groups based on our personal skills and talents. There are people who are creative (writing, drama, art, music) and then people who are good with science, maths, problem solving.

There are the carers, the listeners, the talkers, the people who are good with their hands and can make things.

We are all different and it is essential that we are. We all have our own special talents that nobody else has. A doctor could not be a nurse, because they would not have the special talents to be a nurse.
Thank you. It's just hard for me to accept who I am sometimes. What hurts me sometimes is that I will daydream about being good at something. And when I'm brought back to reality, I just feel even more depressed.
 
Tawny

Tawny

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Joined
Nov 10, 2019
Messages
13,312
Location
England
Thank you. It's just hard for me to accept who I am sometimes. What hurts me sometimes is that I will daydream about being good at something. And when I'm brought back to reality, I just feel even more depressed.
I completely understand that one! For me it is singing and dancing, playing instruments to very loud amazing music (very badly). I love dancing but have never had training.

It is good to escape somewhere happy for a while, it is like watching a movie in a way. How often do you do it?
 
Tawny

Tawny

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Joined
Nov 10, 2019
Messages
13,312
Location
England
I would love to create art and have fun with it. I watch art tutorials online sometimes.
Is it ok to have as a hobby that you will improve over time, maybe make things for others or sell some online?

Or do you need to earn money?

I love to make things and sell a small amount, but luckily am on benefits so don't have to earn much money from anything, it is more for pleasure.

There are many volunteering projects too, like decorating places in the community like painting flowers on fencing at the train station, or decorating rooms in a school or church hall. Nurseries have their playground fences decorated often.
 
L

Ladyfair

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Joined
Aug 12, 2020
Messages
2,103
Location
USA
Hi, first I want to say you are a very kind person. Your replies on my threads are always kind. Your NOT stupid because you don't understand certain things. I was never good at math and can't understand it still. I never graduated high school. I tried two times to take the GED (high school diploma) and passed all subjects except the math. I never tried again. The people especially the teachers who called you names are pitiful. I day dream a lot too. Please don't put yourself down if you want to do art, do it. You deserve to be happy show those people they are wrong and try to believe in yourself. I'm in your corner. Good luck!🤗
 
F

Frosty1

Former member
I completely understand that one! For me it is singing and dancing, playing instruments to very loud amazing music (very badly). I love dancing but have never had training.

It is good to escape somewhere happy for a while, it is like watching a movie in a way. How often do you do it?
I daydream about being a better person everyday. Sometimes I try to stop thinking so much about it because this stops me from focusing on my real life.

Is it ok to have as a hobby that you will improve over time, maybe make things for others or sell some online?

Or do you need to earn money?

I love to make things and sell a small amount, but luckily am on benefits so don't have to earn much money from anything, it is more for pleasure.

There are many volunteering projects too, like decorating places in the community like painting flowers on fencing at the train station, or decorating rooms in a school or church hall. Nurseries have their playground fences decorated often.
Thank you so much! That sounds like a good idea. I never had a huge interest in selling art, just creating it. I feel like my interest in going to an art school was only part of my daydreaming. I still think about going to one, but a part of me wants to keep drawing and painting as a hobby. Thank you again :hug:
 
F

Frosty1

Former member
Hi, first I want to say you are a very kind person. Your replies on my threads are always kind. Your NOT stupid because you don't understand certain things. I was never good at math and can't understand it still. I never graduated high school. I tried two times to take the GED (high school diploma) and passed all subjects except the math. I never tried again. The people especially the teachers who called you names are pitiful. I day dream a lot too. Please don't put yourself down if you want to do art, do it. You deserve to be happy show those people they are wrong and try to believe in yourself. I'm in your corner. Good luck!🤗
Thank you so much :hug: I'm sorry you went through this. I'm hoping the best for you! Math is so confusing. There are times I wish I could understand it.

you are far from being stupid ,i promise ,you artwork and kindness are out of this world good x
Thank you so much :hug: Hope you're doing well.
 
F

Frosty1

Former member
Hi everyone. Thank you so much for a kind comments.

:grouphug:

I'm sorry I'm always talking about this on the forum. I always feel like I'm just not good enough. When it comes to my trouble with focusing on things, I plan on telling my psychiatrist about it. Maybe he will be able to help by giving me some answers. For now, I will try to focus on my interests the best I can. Maybe watch a movie or listen to music to help cheer me up. Thank you all again. Hope you're all doing well.
 
M

Maple

Former member
Sorry, I didn't know where to post this.

Since my childhood, people have called me stupid. Mostly classmates and teachers. I know some might say that I shouldn't listen to the negative things people said, but I agree with them. I'm just trying to finally accept who I am as a person, whether it's how I am or how I look. It's not easy, but I'm going to start trying.

I was never a great student in school. My grades actually became worse as I got older. I remember one teacher describing me as slow because of how terrible I did in his class. I always had trouble concentrating on things. When I was younger, I didn't like to read because every time I tried reading, I would have to read sentences over again. I always thought about other things instead of the book in front of me. I love reading now, but I still don't read a lot. I also have this problem when trying to focus on other things. Watching a movie, playing video games... everything. My mind travels somewhere else and I forget things very easily.

I was also never good at learning things. I tried teaching myself a few things, like art or German. But I even have a lot of trouble with that. I actually had a crazy idea of going to an art school because art is the only thing I'm kind of good at, but I feel like I'm not good enough to actually make this a reality. I told a psychiatrist once about wanting to go to an art school, and he sort of laughed at the idea. Now I feel embarrassed every time I think of that memory.

As an adult, I was told that I might have dyscalculia. I fully believe I have it because I don't understand math at all. Counting money and telling time is already hard for me to do. So in school I was really, really bad at math. I got called stupid for this as well. I can't change it. This is another reason I'm trying to accept all of this.

I'm not doing anything with my life. I have no plans for the future because I don't exactly have a future. Focusing on anything is hard because I daydream too much. I have trouble organizing things, especially my life, and keeping up with other people. I tried focusing on my education again, but I know that it's hopeless. I had dreams about going to a university, but I'm afraid that this will never happen.

Sorry if I repeated anything here. I know I complain a lot about this. I just want to find a way to live with the person I am, even if I really hate myself.

I believe, as others herehave said, there are many different kinds of intelligence. It's just about finding the thing you gel with that makes you happy and running with it.
I was considered intelligent for a long time in school, but I was also known as a slacker. Even getting my English degree I would regularly avoid reading books that were assigned (lol). In the real world, however, I'm extremely lackadaisical; I have trouble concentrating on simple tasks even and I'm pretty incompetent at most things. I would probably still be considered somewhat intelligent by most of the professors i had, but my managers probably think I'm a jackass.
I strongly relate to you when you say you aren't going anywhere in life. Even before going to college, I felt like I was spinning my wheels and I had no real future. Now I've been graduated for nearly two years and I still live at home with a crappy retail job. It sucks, especially feeling the time slip by so quickly and knowing I could have changed things in that span. Idk, you aren't alone in those feelings, tho. You shouldn't let your insecurities keep you from trying out higher education
 
F

Frosty1

Former member
I believe, as others herehave said, there are many different kinds of intelligence. It's just about finding the thing you gel with that makes you happy and running with it.
I was considered intelligent for a long time in school, but I was also known as a slacker. Even getting my English degree I would regularly avoid reading books that were assigned (lol). In the real world, however, I'm extremely lackadaisical; I have trouble concentrating on simple tasks even and I'm pretty incompetent at most things. I would probably still be considered somewhat intelligent by most of the professors i had, but my managers probably think I'm a jackass.
I strongly relate to you when you say you aren't going anywhere in life. Even before going to college, I felt like I was spinning my wheels and I had no real future. Now I've been graduated for nearly two years and I still live at home with a crappy retail job. It sucks, especially feeling the time slip by so quickly and knowing I could have changed things in that span. Idk, you aren't alone in those feelings, tho. You shouldn't let your insecurities keep you from trying out higher education
Thank you so much! I agree with you. And I used to do the same thing when I was younger. I never read any of the books I was supposed to read. I also found school so boring, and public school was a nightmare. Too much bullying. That's why I was homeschooled for the last two years of high school. Took me forever to finish that, too. Especially since my mental health kept getting worse over the years. But I'm just glad that's all in the past.

I'm sorry you're also going through the feeling of having no future. I hope you find something that will work out for you and make you happy. Maybe once the pandemic is over, things will improve.
 
F

Frosty1

Former member
I just wanted to apologize again for this post since I mostly write about feeling this way. I also want to apologize to anyone who also feels like I do. I am trying to be nice to myself and stop putting myself down. After thinking about all of this, I realize how rude it sounds of me to say these things. Especially to those dealing with something similar. I'm very sorry.

I think we all have our own talents and skills. Learning is something I want to continue doing so I can improve. I don't want my insecurities to hold me back and make me feel like I can never accomplish something. I also hope that anyone else feeling this way will be okay.

Sending hugs to you all :grouphug:
 
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