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How do I allow myself to cope?

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angelflower

Well-known member
Joined
May 7, 2017
Messages
634
This may be a stupid question, but how do I allow myself to cope? I've had a prolonged period of suicidality. Don't get me wrong, I still think about it, but it's not quite as intense as it was. (I hope I'm not jinxing things).

I'm doing ok at the moment. Just ok, nothing more. I'm scared to admit that fact. Doing ok is the unknown. I feel like I get peace of mind when I'm suicidal. Does that sound stupid?

I hope what I've said has made sense. Thanks for listening.
 
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angelflower

Well-known member
Joined
May 7, 2017
Messages
634
I can't cope any longer. I want to die now.
 
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angelflower

Well-known member
Joined
May 7, 2017
Messages
634
OK I give in
 
R_Sxo

R_Sxo

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 24, 2017
Messages
2,202
Hi angelflower,

Sorry that you didn't get a response quicker! It sounds like you're going through a really rough time. I think the way to allow yourself to cope is to accept that you have a problem you can't fix by yourself, and going to seek out that supportx

Please keep going - you've done so well to get this far, keep fighting on!x

Much love <3
 
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angelflower

Well-known member
Joined
May 7, 2017
Messages
634
Hi angelflower,

Sorry that you didn't get a response quicker! It sounds like you're going through a really rough time. I think the way to allow yourself to cope is to accept that you have a problem you can't fix by yourself, and going to seek out that supportx

Please keep going - you've done so well to get this far, keep fighting on!x

Much love <3
Bless you for your reply. It means a lot to me. I can't fight any longer. I have nothing left in me. xxxx
 
C

Cheapshot

New member
Joined
Sep 25, 2018
Messages
1
Location
Germany
Hey angelflower,

when I first tried to allow myself to cope it didn't work at all.
My therapist told me about all these things called 'skills' that I should try out to cope but there was absolutely nothing I even wanted to try. Unfortunately there is not such a thing as "The ultimate guide to recovery" but you might find my experience a little useful.

When I thought about "coping" or "using skills" I was always imaging something that would help me to completely defuse the situation I'm dealing with. Well, I was wrong. In the beginning it was im possible to do anything that would have helped so after months I tried to radically accept the situation and change my setting. For me that meant to change my environment (go out and walk down the street and back) or stop doing what was infuriating me and accept that this is done for today and I won't try until tomorrow/later. You get the scheme? I didn't exactly 'deal' with this stuff but I coped - the way it helped me. That is the point, it need to work out for you and nobody else. Maybe you can think of a few things you like or can do rather 'automatically' (again, for me this is putting on headphones and running/walking) like listening to loud/particular music, going out or simpler stuff like ripping a piece of paper or writing down what's in your head.

It will take some time for you to find out what works best. Don't give up I believe you got this!
 
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angelflower

Well-known member
Joined
May 7, 2017
Messages
634
Thanks for your message cheapshot. I appreciate it. I'm struggling a bit to take on board everything what you've said, but like I said, I do appreciate it. My therapist today talked about radical acceptance, in particular for when I have urges to commit suicide, so if I radically accept them, it might allow them to pass.

Thanks again. xxxx
 
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Rachelm2535

Member
Joined
Aug 8, 2018
Messages
7
Sorry it took awhile to reply for me too. For 25 years I was in this situation. I loathed myself so much! But I can tell you it can be overcome. It was God who helped me overcome this but please hold on to hope you are worth so much more then the thoughts that rattle through our heads. Start replacing those negative thoughts with positive and you will see an enourmous different. Praying for you! -Rachel
 
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angelflower

Well-known member
Joined
May 7, 2017
Messages
634
Thanks Rachel for your reply. Much appreciated. I don't believe it can be overcome. I don't believe I deserve to get better. Besides, being better feels really scary. Thanks for caring. xxxx
 
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Rachelm2535

Member
Joined
Aug 8, 2018
Messages
7
Angelflower- Friend I am not going to believe that for you. I believe everyone deserves freedom. Believe me I was the worst of the worst and thought I deserved everything I got. But think about it what would you say to someone else in the same situation. Would you condemn them to suffering? I wonder what would happen if you tried just changing one thing that you think so negatively about yourself. Just start with one and see how that starts to change your thought process. By the way yes being better may seem scary but anything new is. But it is so freeing. Praying for you and thank you for responding.
 
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msophie

Member
Joined
Jun 19, 2018
Messages
14
I can relate a lot to your original post, in fact I just wrote a super long post about this topic myself. I am not sure if I got any advice but sometimes it's helpful to know that someone else experiences these feelings. Whenever I'm feeling really suicidal, I just want out and want to feel better but when I do feel better, I can't cope with that, either. Maybe that's because it feels less like me or because being unwell gives me a sense of validation, I don't know. Anyway, sending loads of love your way!
 
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