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How did you know you had the illness?

T

Tvgirl

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I learned I had the illness when one day I got in the car, I turned on the radio, and the radio was broadcasting about me. Every caller that called in was talking about me. Then I turned on the TV when I got home and everyone was talking about me. It was the most scariest sh#t I’ve experienced in my life. I still can’t tell if it is real or not but that was a scary experience.
 
T

Tvgirl

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But I think it started before hand because everywhere I went people knew who I was and was talking about me.
 
EdEd

EdEd

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I think it started for me the same way.. dumb as fuck if I remember correctly... but it turned out the television wasnt talking about me , and the radio had nothing to do with me.
 
EdEd

EdEd

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I dont even think that initially I was hearing voices , I just thought the radio and television had some significance to my life... then I started to hear them one terrible morning...and they crept in like a thief in the night and decided , hey this guys hearing voices...the sound of birds... in the middle of the night.. ash I remember so well... hearing dumb voices that knew how to be silent better then than they do now strangely enough.. they blended in with the environment , almost flawlessly...then boom ! Schizophrenia.. my life was turned upside down , and they harassed the living fuck out of me... but made it seem like it was me... so damn annoying... forced telepathy... people hearing my thoughts and giving me 100% shit advice... but they said if I followed it they'd go away... but they never held up their end of the bargain.. so I did stupid stuff tried to kill myself because no body knew what the fuck I was talking about.. so I felt signalled out... and tried to end my own life.. wasnt successful obviously , thankfully.. and was put in like a 24 hr.. 36 hr hold until the magical crisis guy appeared...to make sure I wasnt going to harm myself or others... so I told him what they wanted to hear. Just to get out... yup.. shot me up with geodon.. didnt work.
 
LORD BURT

LORD BURT

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Chronic psychosis like what you describe can be incredibly distressing and scary. I believe that our local environment changes during psychosis.
 
EdEd

EdEd

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Retarded , weakened me to a state where I was incredibly paranoid and continued to insinuate that I had to be telepathic... took advantage of me for.. hmm.. close to two years... then I started to research and research until I figured it out.. atleast figured it out... more and more pieces to the puzzle came together.. and boom..finally all the pieces fit.. wow... cool.. Now , I have a poor attitude mentally... but fuck getting hurt over and over and over and over... never again.. I'm not a telepath , nothing I think , say , write , or do should indicate that I want to engage in telepathy.... then poof..... silence ...for the most part. Get treated like a piece of trash at the begginning...
 
EdEd

EdEd

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Feel more like a winner now... better attitude less hardships.. why walk around thinking :"Oh no , if I think this it may hurt this other persons feelings" pfft.. screw that. Not how i want to live my life any longer.
 
EdEd

EdEd

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Or think "If I think this way then someone might get mad..." well it's not my choice to hear voices.. if I had my way I'd shut them down completely... but it's close nowadays...
 
EdEd

EdEd

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So I'm content...whoa... sorry had to get that off my chest...much better now.
 
LORD BURT

LORD BURT

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Yeah we need to make this stuff common dialogue. Who cares about it people find it uncomfortable
 
EdEd

EdEd

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The people that care the most about the content of their thoughts...and worry about hurting someone else's feelings get the most stressed.. because they genuinely care... so why care? It's far to stressful to have to tip-toe around someone else's feelings...and that is not how the mind was designed to work... its suppose to be a secure environment for you to think whatever the fuck you want to think... do it. Think however you want , dont worry about hurting anyone..because it's not your fault.. if the thoughts go through and it actually hurts someone else feelings ... fuck em... I didnt want them to hear it anyways.
 
EdEd

EdEd

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Yeah we need to make this stuff common dialogue. Who cares about it people find it uncomfortable
The majority is uncomfortable with it.. you are correct... so what do you say majority rules?
 
EdEd

EdEd

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We care enough and have enough respect for ourselves , to not want to be taken advantage of..we also are constantly trying to make sure we dont hurt anyone else's feelings... a great distraction ... wow.. no thanks.
 
Ramson mash

Ramson mash

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How about if the world actually WAS talking about you. And your soul felt crushed due to exposure and shame for a matter of years?
Well, evenually you will recover and slowly get back to normal, unless ofcourse you feel a need to sensationalise your story for whatever egocentric reasons and live through your own mistakes in the natural way of chaos.
 
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