How can you help someone when they are on a low

J

Jaytheterrible

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#1
Hello, my partner has bipolar 2. Her Lows are more frequent, longer lasting than her highs. She was prescribed lamictal but has so far refused to take them and each time she has a low its getting worse, particularly when she is on her monthly cycle. Had a great Bank Holiday weekend with her and friends and last night all of a sudden... Bang! In Come the low. She is now completely withdrawn, doesn't want to talk about it and is just full of self hate, which is scaring me now as she never used to get this bad. I'm just worried she ends up hurting herself or worse. I've tried talking to her mental health support but they won't talk to me due to patient confidentiality so I'm stuck, feel like I can't help her and she's slipping through my fingers gradually and there's nothing I can do to help. Doesn't matter what I say, doesn't help :( please advise someone? Thanks in advance
 
Kerome

Kerome

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#2
Well you could try just being with her and listening? If you tell her you’re there for her, that she has friends, people willing to help her and a place in this world then that might cheer her up a little. She is probably all wrapped up in negative self-thinking, and she needs some positives to help her.

The thing is not to put any pressure on her. Even if you just sit there with her for half an hour you will have done something positive, there will be something shared.
 
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IWILLOBTAINMENTALHEALTH

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#3
I agree with Kerome about just listening to her. Being supportive is the best thing you can do, as you are already being supportive. :hug:
 
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Jaytheterrible

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#4
Thankyou for the advice so far guys, I really do appreciate it. It's just so hard seeing someone that you love go through such shite it's horrible. Just wish she could get it managed to any extent as the more time goes on the worse her lows are becoming :(
 
Mayfair

Mayfair

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#6
Hello, my partner has bipolar 2. Her Lows are more frequent, longer lasting than her highs. She was prescribed lamictal but has so far refused to take them and each time she has a low its getting worse, particularly when she is on her monthly cycle. Had a great Bank Holiday weekend with her and friends and last night all of a sudden... Bang! In Come the low. She is now completely withdrawn, doesn't want to talk about it and is just full of self hate, which is scaring me now as she never used to get this bad. I'm just worried she ends up hurting herself or worse. I've tried talking to her mental health support but they won't talk to me due to patient confidentiality so I'm stuck, feel like I can't help her and she's slipping through my fingers gradually and there's nothing I can do to help. Doesn't matter what I say, doesn't help :( please advise someone? Thanks in advance
I think the answer for the low could be in this bold Jaytheterrible.

'Natural' highs, like having a great time with friends (and you) ... end suddenly - with things like bank holidays, or holidays, or any unusual but 'party type' event. Most other normal every day events don't have this sudden end. This, I would say, could potentially be a cause of the bang.
 
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Jaytheterrible

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#7
Was thinking this myself, am sitting beside her right now, 4 hours until I have to get up for work and she's been telling me she doesn't want to get better anymore. That she no longer cares and anything I say to try and help ISN'T Helping. I so want to take the day off work and take her to the gp, but can't afford to have time off as she gave up her job recently because of this
 
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IWILLOBTAINMENTALHEALTH

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#8
Sorry about that. It's sweet you care for her so much. You're a good person mate.
 
J

Jaytheterrible

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#9
Thankyou fubarlady, she's my universe mate and everything in it. Hate seeing her suffer with this. And it's even worse when it seems to be overspilling into every other aspect of our lives and feeling like the wheels are about to come off. It sucks, wish I knew what to do
 
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