HIV ANXIETY - Imagining things

C

Cupcakes89

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Nov 2, 2016
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Hi, on 29th October, I went for dinner with a male friend. We shared two pints of beer and a mojito. On top of that i had two jagerbombs (with red bull). We were eating heavily. I had carbonara pasta and side dishes. I remembered many things clearly. We left the place and walked back to the train station, otw to the station we stopped at a bus stop and had some cigs and listened to music. At the train station, we went our separate ways as we live in different directions. And I took the train home and walked home and reached home. I remember showering etc and preparing for work the next day. But im so scared from the the time i left the restaurant till I made it home, I may have had sex with someone or got raped etc. I can at soonest test at the 14 days mark but it wont be conclusive. The next day I went to get a postinor (morning after pill) just in case. Im so scared. I know i didnt drink excessively. I even texted my parents to say im coming home etc. Help. Will I know if I had sex with someone and will I know if I got raped? I pieced the timeline back from my messages, fare card history etc and it all almost adds up. My mind is playing tricks on me. I'm so fatigued. I require help. Thank you so much.
 
Nikita

Nikita

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Hi Cupcakes:welcome:,

How distressing,it must be a very anxious time for you.What do you think has made you not know what happened,do you disassociate due to mental illness or did you have too much to drink?Are there any memories there to give you an idea of what happened?
i am sorry to say all you can do is have the HIV test and then repeat it after 3 months then you will know if you are in the clear,of course you must test for all the other STD's too.I am so sorry,how awful!You might find it helpful to talk to a counselor too!
 
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Cupcakes89

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Nov 2, 2016
Messages
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I know nothing happened. Even my friend said nothing happened but the thoughts keep coming. I dont wanna keep testing.
 
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