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Justafriend95

Justafriend95

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 7, 2019
Messages
672
Location
Netherlands
Hi,
I'm so sorry you are struggling, do you have much support? Do you have a mental health care team looking after you?
Hope you heal very soon.
Take care
No I have not a mental health care team. I'm on my own
 
Justafriend95

Justafriend95

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 7, 2019
Messages
672
Location
Netherlands
Today I almost died 3 times.

Today we did want to do a buggedlist thing, surfing. So we drove to the sea and payed for a lesson. First we tried on the land. We did get the info we needed and then we jumpt into the sea.

I noticed my arms where feeling weak but desided to do it anyway. I was barely half in the sea and was already seasick. Good start 🤣

Well there we went. Do what we had practiced. The first wave works well. I mean I am not standing on the board of course. I mean I am me and I fall of course from my board. 🤣

Again I climb on the board. There came a huge wave. I try to stand fall of halfway and get deep in the wave. So deep that when I came out the water with my head the new wave came over me and I didn't have time to breathe. I really thought I was going to die. I swallowed so much seawater that I almost trow up. Big panic attack.

And then you have to get back on your board and do it again. I tried a few more times, but again I swollowed so much water in and those waves pushed so hard. I really couldn't breath.

So I'm sitting on my board. Feeling sick like helI when I said we're going back I'm going to throw up. The man who had been laughing at me for 15 minutes saw that I meant it and helped me back.

If you think that's easy, you're wrong... So I am paddling back. But my arms just wouldn't work anymore. I was so tired... the man loosened my ankle bracelet and asked me: can you swim? He said you go and I will take your board with me.

Most stupid idea ever. Swimming was just as heavy but now I couldn't have a break. The the next Big wave. Again I fell all over again. Again panic attack... almost to the side where I could finally stand. I thought yes I am there (stood up to my waist in the water).

A huge wave picked me up and smashed me hard on the beach. The pressure of the water so high really 2 more times and I was not alive anymore.. the people on the beach all where shocked. The only thing I thought was: I made it out alive and don't trow up.

Never knew that water was so powerful.. Now 1,5 hours later and I can't stop shaking. It was so traumatic.. I never go into the rough sea again.

Conclusion: Never again!
 
Z

Zoe1

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Joined
Jul 8, 2019
Messages
3,233
Location
Nowhere
good story

Im glad you're OK , yes waves can be very powerful like that
I too have felt them
are you glad you survived ?

:hug5:
 
TiredTina

TiredTina

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Messages
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Location
West Sussex, England
This may be of some help to you. Give them a call and see if they can help, I hope they can.

The Samaritans of Thailand, Bangkok
Thai: ? (02) 713-6793 (12 noon – 10:00 pm)
English: ? (02) 713-6791 (24 hours/day)
The Samaritans of Thailand, Chiang Mai
? (053) 225-977/8 (7:00 pm – 10 pm Mon, Tues, Thurs, Sat)
 
vanish

vanish

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Forum Safety Team
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Sep 29, 2014
Messages
2,238
Location
The Land of Oz
Surfing sounds like it could be very traumatic, especially in you’re not confident. I’m glad you’re okay!
 
Justafriend95

Justafriend95

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 7, 2019
Messages
672
Location
Netherlands
good story

Im glad you're OK , yes waves can be very powerful like that
I too have felt them
are you glad you survived ?

:hug5:
Yes I'm glad I survived. I don't want to die..
 
Justafriend95

Justafriend95

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 7, 2019
Messages
672
Location
Netherlands
This may be of some help to you. Give them a call and see if they can help, I hope they can.

The Samaritans of Thailand, Bangkok
Thai: ? (02) 713-6793 (12 noon – 10:00 pm)
English: ?
(02) 713-6791 (24 hours/day)

The Samaritans of Thailand, Chiang Mai
? (053) 225-977/8 (7:00 pm – 10 pm Mon, Tues, Thurs, Sat)
I asked for help but I have to wait for a few months
 
Z

Zoe1

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 8, 2019
Messages
3,233
Location
Nowhere
k great, what do you hope to do in your life ?
what do you like doing ?

:hug5:
 
Justafriend95

Justafriend95

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 7, 2019
Messages
672
Location
Netherlands
Surfing sounds like it could be very traumatic, especially in you’re not confident. I’m glad you’re okay!
It was very traumatic.. It's all I can think of right now. Feel very anxious.. don't want to go near the rough side of the sea.

While on my surfboard I almost started crying.. I was so fk scared had to peddle back for 250 meter. It was so hard.. I felt like giving up. Without that man his help I had drowned
 
Justafriend95

Justafriend95

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 7, 2019
Messages
672
Location
Netherlands
k great, what do you hope to do in your life ?
what do you like doing ?

:hug5:
I hope to start my own business and make money out of art. I want to get my diving licence.
And travel the world
 
Z

Zoe1

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Messages
3,233
Location
Nowhere
wow that sounds exciting !
do you post your art on the internet at all ?

:dance:
 
Justafriend95

Justafriend95

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 7, 2019
Messages
672
Location
Netherlands
wow that sounds exciting !
do you post your art on the internet at all ?

:dance:
A little not that much. 🥺😬
Bit anxious about what people will say. I know I should not care but I do..

Have to be honest I didn't do art for the last couple of weeks. Idk why.. I really love to make things. But someone has to give me an assignment. I find it difficult to just do something.
Do you know anything?

I can make
- logo's
- digital painting
- digital draw
- cards
- ect.
 
Z

Zoe1

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 8, 2019
Messages
3,233
Location
Nowhere
yes I get all of that,
at one point I decided to do drawings
that nobody will ever see
and I wrote that at the top of each page

that way I learned to express my feelings through art
so if you are not ready to publish it thats fine

and yes I also need motivation from other people sometimes !

I would say try to draw something that expresses your feelings
for a suggestion

and you could also look at the members gallery on this forum
see what other people are posting

:cheer::loveshower:
 
Justafriend95

Justafriend95

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 7, 2019
Messages
672
Location
Netherlands
yes I get all of that,
at one point I decided to do drawings
that nobody will ever see
and I wrote that at the top of each page

that way I learned to express my feelings through art
so if you are not ready to publish it thats fine

and yes I also need motivation from other people sometimes !

I would say try to draw something that expresses your feelings
for a suggestion

and you could also look at the members gallery on this forum
see what other people are posting

:cheer::loveshower:
The members gallery? Where can I find this?
 
Z

Zoe1

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 8, 2019
Messages
3,233
Location
Nowhere
go to where it says forums, click the link
and then look right down the bottom to the chill out lounge
and its in there

:hug5:
 
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