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Hi. New member here. Finally at the age of 36 looking for help, support, advice.

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philees

New member
Joined
Feb 25, 2009
Messages
3
Location
Manchester
Hi. New member here. Finally at the age of 36 looking for help, support, advice.

Hi. Where to start? Never really done this before. That is trying to explain 36 years of mental angst as briefly as possible. Or even at all. To anyone. I'm a bloke after all. We just deal with and accept don't we? Well I'm afraid I can't anymore. But this is not about me (although I'm sure the seeds of mental problems are there) it is about my mother. Good old Mum.
As I said the best option for me was to bury my head in the sand. As I have done for the last fifteen years so why change now? That's Mum. In and out of hospital...get better-get sick, get better-get sick....let sis look after it. Well I guess I just have to accept some things. An acceptance of who I am, the problems my mother has, the experiences I lived through.
What compelled me today to type was another sectioning of my Mum last week. Two police cars. My sister in pieces. She's 29. We've seen our Mum sectioned on at least eight occasions that i can remember. There may be more. The childhood memories tend to warp into one. Such as visiting Mum in Rainhill Hospital (aka Lunatic Asylum) in the eighties when she was a patient there for two years when my sister and I were in school (only recently with research did i discover it to be the largest lunatic asylum in Europe with some 2500 patients-right on my doorstep as locals), in an old age hospice at the age of 47 expected to die after liver failure, the hernia, the bi-polar, diabeties, cancer, the decay, alcoholism, depression, schizophrenia and all the other physical damage......I don't know where to start or where to end. My sister knows more about the conditions than I do.
I just know it's been like this all of my sister's and my life. We have been in limbo for years. A Mother who exists but drains us. And has for years. A Mother we dearly love and would want nothing more than to resemblance some kind of normality but an acceptance that that will never be the case.
 
honeyquince

honeyquince

Well-known member
Founding Member
Joined
May 27, 2008
Messages
1,719
Location
Yorkshire
Hi there and welcome to the forum.

Sometimes just writing these things down can help and I hope you found that writing your post did so a bit? Anyway, good to have you here and keep posting.
 
D

Dollit

Guest
Even though you say you don't know where to start you already have. It's not a life experience I think you can ever say is "dealt with", life isn't like that, memories don't work like that but if we can help you get to a spot where you feel less drained, less washed out and more able to move on.

I must admit I smiled a wry smile at the lunatic asylum description - must have had a pretty dire effect on you to want to call it that.

Welcome to the forum and I hope we can help.
 
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philees

New member
Joined
Feb 25, 2009
Messages
3
Location
Manchester
Thank you for the kind replies. Yes Rainhill was a haunting experience. Lunatic Asylum was the official title for many of these institutions for a long long time, it not a term I use loosely. Whilst I have many doubts about care in the community at least it is unlikely we will ever return to these dark days.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pI2UNbd7lxY A documentary for those who have never seen it.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5eAzVo3vsME
 
ms_P

ms_P

Well-known member
Founding Member
Joined
Jul 21, 2008
Messages
3,067
Location
BeNeLux
welcome-1.png:flowers:

I'm sure you'll find lot's of support here.
 
A

Apotheosis

Guest
Thank you for the kind replies. Yes Rainhill was a haunting experience. Lunatic Asylum was the official title for many of these institutions for a long long time, it not a term I use loosely. Whilst I have many doubts about care in the community at least it is unlikely we will ever return to these dark days.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pI2UNbd7lxY A documentary for those who have never seen it.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5eAzVo3vsME
So sad - what so many have gone through - forgotten about - invisible.
 
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