S
scarlet
New member
Founding Member
- Joined
- Apr 11, 2008
- Messages
- 1
hi, this is my first post here and it is probably going to ramble a bit...so will say sorry first
I am a 30 yr old mother of 3 and have been married for nearly 13 years. technically i have been diagnosed since my first daughters birth 12 years ago...looking back i had problems as a teen too. The last 3 years things have become worse n worse..I get put back on prozac but hate taking it, it feels false so i come off it then go back rinse n repeat. I tried counselling but tbh it didnt help there was all this airy fairy stuff about making creaures inside me to give my emotions to..I was tested for bipolar havent got it. I used to be a fairly confident, ambitious person..now i am scared of everything. I feel guilty constantly. At the moment I feel like i have probably messed up my kids lives big time. We have no money no prospects. I can't rememeber the last time that a day passed without me crying and i mean loads of crying. I am driving my husband potty...I see meanings in everything. I question everything he says or doesnt say. I am scared of upsetting people even complete strangers. I will fret about something that happened in the day for hours. I have no real friends no family support. I magnify everything I get angry at myself for being so useless. I have piled on weight I hate myself soo much I don't know what to do. Husband wants me to go back to the GP but I can't face having to go through it all again.. I just cry so much then have to go through waiting room after with everyone looking at me. I seem to be going round in a big downward spiral and really cant see the bottom. I am a control freak but cant control anything at the moment.
see rambling sorry
scarlet
I am a 30 yr old mother of 3 and have been married for nearly 13 years. technically i have been diagnosed since my first daughters birth 12 years ago...looking back i had problems as a teen too. The last 3 years things have become worse n worse..I get put back on prozac but hate taking it, it feels false so i come off it then go back rinse n repeat. I tried counselling but tbh it didnt help there was all this airy fairy stuff about making creaures inside me to give my emotions to..I was tested for bipolar havent got it. I used to be a fairly confident, ambitious person..now i am scared of everything. I feel guilty constantly. At the moment I feel like i have probably messed up my kids lives big time. We have no money no prospects. I can't rememeber the last time that a day passed without me crying and i mean loads of crying. I am driving my husband potty...I see meanings in everything. I question everything he says or doesnt say. I am scared of upsetting people even complete strangers. I will fret about something that happened in the day for hours. I have no real friends no family support. I magnify everything I get angry at myself for being so useless. I have piled on weight I hate myself soo much I don't know what to do. Husband wants me to go back to the GP but I can't face having to go through it all again.. I just cry so much then have to go through waiting room after with everyone looking at me. I seem to be going round in a big downward spiral and really cant see the bottom. I am a control freak but cant control anything at the moment.
see rambling sorry
scarlet