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Hi! Looking for some advice or ideas on to finding a solution



New member
Dec 11, 2020
Hi I have been suffering from depression and anxiety for a few years throughout my life, some of it is due to issues in my past as well as current events affecting my mental health, 3 years ago I met my girlfriend, she was very similar to me in personality and I love her more than anything else in the world, when attending university we had to go to different ones which are around a 4 hour train journey apart and an 8 hour drive, she currently shares a house with 3 of her friends (they are away right now so she is alone) and it is very costly for me to visit so I cannot do it often.
Recently due to the COVID issue I had a mental breakdown and called Samaritans, I followed their advice and completed some tests and I was recorded as having severe depression and anxiety, so I decided to reach out and ask for help, I am currently completing therapy and receiving counselling from my uni and I am trying to become the person I want to be, however my girlfriend is alone in a cluttered dark house and I know her mental health is becoming worse, however whenever I mention asking for help or doing anything she snaps at me, we've been arguing a lot and she seems to think that nothing can help.
To sum up:
Both myself and my girlfriend are suffering from severe depression
I am seeking help and attempting to better myself and fix it
My girlfriend thinks she cannot be helped and no therapy or mental treatment will change anything
If she doesn't do something about this I fear it will affect her future grades/job and eventually our relationship
She's the love of my life and it's killing me to see her like this

one light

one light

Well-known member
Aug 19, 2020
England - Up North
Hi welcome here... I have a thread on virus protection on here if you have a look around...


Well-known member
Oct 1, 2020
Welcome to the forum! That sounds really tough. It makes things so much more difficult when our loved ones don’t want any help. I’m not sure what the best thing to do is. Maybe be as understanding as you can. Validate her feelings as much as you can. Sometimes people just want to be heard and understood rather than be given advice or solutions to get better. Have you brought it up to your counselor? Maybe they’d have some good insight.
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