Hi, I'm Anne

P

Porica123

New member
Joined
Jan 22, 2019
Messages
3
Location
Venezuela
#1
Hi! My name is Anne from Venzuela, so I'll probably have some grammar mistakes..
I've been feeling not myself since this past year. I've been feeling down, in a way that I just dont want to do stuff, even if i have a lot to do, an yet i act completely indifferent about it. Since little i suffered from anxiety, although i was a bit more social, throughout the years i became more insecure and self doubtful... I had a particular year where i would harm myself now and then everytime i let down anyone that meant a lot to me, and that ceased for a while until last year.
Last year I dealt with a break up, but it affected me in a really deep way, where i started to have anxiety attacks again, started to feel even more insecure, started to feel useless, and started to hate my present, saying that i was unhappy, and things got worse, until my parents saw something was wrong with me and sent me to a therapist.
I started going to the therapist but I never reached to the point i felt comfortable ranting about anything, crying, or whatever.. i just felt like a casual conversation with someone and i just couldnt feel any change or improvement, the only thing that improved was getting over my break up, but still felt unhappy, and would compare how i was in the past to the present. Right now, for a moment i felt things were getting back together once again, but no, it was a small improvement to later have a harsh fall where i just felt empty, alone, hiding my emotions constantly because i dont want to bother anyone, or sound like im trying to seek attention.

This has been going on too much lately, where i even cry without a precise reason, and the frustration has been growing throughout the days, and since i didnt feel any improvement with my therapist because of feeling self conscious of just spit out my raw feelings, thought of seeking that through here where probably i would not feel judge about my deepest and darkest thoughts, and how i've been feeling and how i've realized that i'm not the same person and things have got worse and worse.
 
Urban Hermit

Urban Hermit

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 18, 2019
Messages
2,045
#2
Hi, welcome to the forum.

I hope you feel comfortable sharing in this safe space.
It sounds like you've hard a hard year and maybe the first therapist wasn't a good match with you, so maybe again with someone else the relationship with you and therapist is a very personal one and you need to feel able to express yourself.

Take care X
 

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