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Hi I am Harley

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harley91

New member
Joined
Mar 28, 2019
Messages
2
Location
Devon
Hi I am Harley! I have BPD, severe depression, Body Dysmorphic Disorder and anxiety.

I have been struggling for a lot of my life but my family never seems to understand they as think me trying to commit suicide is attention seeking and I am being stupid. I have tried to overdose 6 times but am really struggling with my latest one 8 days ago as I have been feeling happy so wasn't even thinking about it. I done it after drinking 3 bottles of wine so must of done it on autopilot as was stuck on my own; I have never been soo disappointed with myself as I have a 17 month year old Son so my Partner and him came home to find me like it. The Police and Ambulance were called so Social Services got called as I kicked off as wanted to go to sleep. My Partner told me not to come home until the Social come around so was away for 5 nights and to get over the pain, disappoinment and boredom I got pretty drunk so the Police got called again as a missing person report. After my Dad text me calling me a selfish bitch as I couldn't see my Son, so I got drunk on vodka and started getting emotional as felt like everyone was turning on me.

My Mum won't talk to me now but she is soo narcissistic she never seen the stuff she used to do to me, my Dad is still not okay with me and I messed up going on holiday with my Dad 2 weeks after it happened and messed up lots of plans. I feel like everyone hates me and want to do it again but actually because I am feeling suicidal now as that shouldn't of happened as I was really happy last Wednesday. Was even getting married in Sept but that is going to be on hold now too. Sorry for the long post I am just soo lost and alone now as feel like everyone is slagging me off.
 
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missme

Well-known member
Joined
Mar 28, 2019
Messages
287
Location
NZ
I hear the pain. I'm so sorry that you are experiencing this. I think you are doing a positive thing for yourself. Having some place to vent, where you know it is safe, I'm certain you still find the support here. I'm only really new here, but I enjoy reading other people's stories. We are all different, but I think we understand better than those who have never gone through it.

Keep sharing.,.. big hug
 
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harley91

New member
Joined
Mar 28, 2019
Messages
2
Location
Devon
Thank you I know it's still raw but I think this time is going to take me a real long time to get over it 😘
 
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missme

Well-known member
Joined
Mar 28, 2019
Messages
287
Location
NZ
Thank you I know it's still raw but I think this time is going to take me a real long time to get over it 😘
I think that is very understandable!
 
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