Hi abertha and
It must be quite distressing, feeling like you could have every mental illness going. I think everyone in their life could attibute many different illnesses to the symptoms they experience and most of the time, it is just a coincidence and nothing more comes of it. As Dollit has said, it is very unlikely you have everything, remember you may not have any mental illness either.
One positive I can say is that you mention you are not rational, but your articulation of that post is incredibly rational to me. Also, remember everyones moods, feelings, and motivations change daily. For instance, I didnt want to get out of bed yesterday and today I was up and out of bed at 6am and didnt need to be. Im not trying to say that your symptoms are not anything, or are everything, but trying to emphasis what you are saying is "normal" in my opinion.
If you feel you need to seek a diagnosis, you will need to see someone face to face who can see how you are, because it is difficult to advise anything online. If you have moved countries, you best option is to seek voluntary organisational support if the healthcare is not free at the point of contact. They will be able to advise you on the best course of action.
Try not to worry and try to stay away from websites that say you have this or that disorder, the symptoms and questions that are asked, typically are very generalised and could be ascribed to 90% of the worlds population. I think one online test I did once ended up telling me I am a women - that morning I found proof I wasnt

.
Seriously though everyone on here will be very supportive and it is a safe environment to share your fears and so forth, but appropriate diagnosis and intervention will have to be sought on a face to face basis.
Take care
Companion