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Helpful methods of coping!

KayTastrophy

KayTastrophy

Member
Joined
Apr 29, 2019
Messages
16
Location
Stockton-on-Tees, Stockton-on-Tees
Hi guys! When I had a CPN I was doing some emotional regulation therapy with me, so I thought I'd share some things that work for me!

They might not all work for you, and different things work for different emotions and situations too, but please, anyone, feel free to include your own method too, maybe, just maybe we can all make a big difference for each other, and help those who never found anything that worked, or for those who have only just been diagnosed and dont understand how to get through the symptoms!

1. THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH YOUR PERSONALITY!!!!
I know it's called a personality disorder but I cannot stress this enough, BPD and EUPD are responses to trauma! Sometimes people who end up with these conditions dont have to suffer external trauma, it can also be caused by internal thoughts, and never learning to understand your emotions and mindfulness!!
That's probably the most important thing to remember! And if you research, then you'll learn more about yourself too :hug:

2. IF YOU NEED TO, CREATE A LOG OF YOUR EMOTIONS!!
Complete a log over a few days or a week, write down what emotion you felt, you can start with anything, whatever is easiest for you to describe!
Write down the situation you were in, or the context for this emotion.
Write down some thoughts that went through your head at the time, how did you interpret the situation?
Write down how you WANTED to respond, what you wanted to do at that moment
Write down what you ACTUALLY did, and how you responded

This should help those who feel lost in the condition to figure out your emotions more, learn some triggers, even for happy things! And believe me, it makes a HUGE difference!

3. CREATE A TRAFFIC LIGHT SYSTEM
notice the early signs of a relapse, from being in control of yourself, to possibly dissociating, then to full relapse, no control over negative emotions and impulse behaviours.

Write down things that make you GREEN and how it feels, what perks you up? Makes you happy? Keeps you feeling good?

Write down what makes you feel AMBER, starting to dip, feeling upset, distant, lost, lonely, dissociated

What makes you feel RED? complete loss of control over emotion, extreme depression, suicidal thoughts, impulsive behaviour including self harming.

It wont be easy, but itll help! A step towards recovery!!

4. CREATE A RELAPSE DRILL
when you feel yourself starting to dip, going into AMBER or RED, what can you do to help take your mind away from the emotion? How can you stop the emotion controlling your thought process and spiralling out of control?

HAVE A HOT SHOWER
I found showers are better than baths, because the feel of warm running water on my body takes my concentration away from thoughts and moods!

LISTEN TO MUSIC AND TIDY
keep that mind occupied! And dont forget, a clear living space is a clear head space!!!

PLAY SOME PUZZLE GAMES
get that mind working! If you're concentrating hard on something else, then itll help bring you back down to earth!

CALL THE CRISIS TEAM
Any free calling service to help, when you feel lost and beyond hope, PLEASE REACH OUT! PEOPLE CAN HELP AND YOU ARENT ALONE!!!

5. UNDERSTAND YOUR EMOTIONS
emotions have subcategories, learn them, itll help you understand yourself better!

6. GROUNDING
use all 5 senses!
What 5 things can you see?
What 4 things can you hear?
What 3 things can you smell?
What 2 things can you feel?
What 1 thing can you taste?

You can do this anywhere without anyone knowing!

6. BREATHING
this is the most simple and easy! Count your breath! How long does it take for you to take a nice deep breath? Count it in, and out, close your eyes and try to empty your mind, it's a kind of meditation, itll help relax the mind and body

7. PHYSICALLY RESPOND TO THE EMOTION IN A HEALTHY AND SAFE WAY
hit a cushion, or throw it against a wall
Kick or throw a ball against a wall
Throw an ice cube into the bath to make it shatter! (Destructive and none harmful)
Write a letter to whoever or about whatever made you feel this way, aggressively tear it up!!

8. KEEP A DIARY
when your head feels cluttered and you cant think clearly, write it all down somewhere you know will be safe and for no one but yourself. It doesnt matter how terribly and scattered the wording is, itll get it out of your head and onto the paper!


9.POSITIVE AFFIRMATIONS
I've seen the positive comments post on here, could we pin it to the top please for those who need it? Read those words, challenge those negative thoughts, and remember, ITS OKAY TO FEEL THAT WAY!!!! you are 100% allowed to feel that way! And just accept the emotion, let it roll over you in waves, cry if you need to, accept it, and I promise you, itll be over so fast!!

I accepted my own negative emotion without help or prompting s few days ago, and i genuinely started crying happy tears, in my 22 years of life I had never been able to do so, and I was so happy to make such progress!!


That's all for now guys, I'll try and add to this when I can, please if anyone can add to this list then do so!

I love you all, and wish you all the best! YOU CAN AND WILL GET BETTER, WE ARE ALL HOLDING OUT OPEN HANDS, WE ARENT DOING THIS ALONE :hug: <3
 
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