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Help with undiagnosed bipolar 2 wife

SunnyDaze

SunnyDaze

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Jun 11, 2017
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I hate to say it but I suspect she's into drugs with her bf.I could be wrong of course but it sure sounds familiar.
 
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Chris3141

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Apr 9, 2019
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New york
Also I should mention that her aunt was diagnosed with BP and her family believes that her great grandma suffered from some kind of mental health problem. I will say though that now that I know the symptoms I have realized that she would seem to go through periods of high energy and less sleep and then periods of laziness and regular sleep. This has been going on for atleast 2 yrs or more. I never really noticed it before. Also when she gets deep into the no sleep pattern some nights she would talk a mile a minute and wouldn't stop. I sometimes would fall asleep on her and she would get so mad.
 
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Chris3141

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I just know that if she is bipolar that this is a life long thing she is going to have to deal with and she is going to need someone who knows her well by her side. I have loved her since the moment I met her but this kid barely knows her. I cant believe this relationship is going to work out. This kid has abandonment issues as his mom and dad left him to be raised by his siblings and anxiety. The other day he had a anxiety attack cuz he wanted to play his video games but didnt want to ignore her... she would have slapped me for that but thought it was cute. She was telling me way to much info I finally told her she needs to stop...
 
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Nina998

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Mar 31, 2019
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Chris I am sorry you have to go through all that. That is lot to take for one person. You seem so responsible and decent guy I feel bad this happened to you.

Some suggested that your ex would be on drugs. If she's not streetwise like you said there could be possibility that her new young boyfriend is supplying her. Abandon her kids like that absolutely tells something huge is going on.

I don't want to reject the drug theory because it sounds logical but I just want to say to you Chris that bipolar disorder really can also change a person. I have done some terrible and unwise things when I have been manic. Many of them have related to relationships like getting engaged after dating a guy some weeks or recently having an affair with a female. I am happily married and a mother of three but my illness makes me do some seriously stupid stuff.

You don't know me or can compare your ex to me but I just wanted to say it could be a mental illness that is making her act like that.

All the best x
 
Lunar Lady

Lunar Lady

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Mar 19, 2019
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Chris, just wanted to make you aware of another member, Mister Michael, who is going through exactly the same scenario as you with his bipolar wife.

Look for his thread 'Bipolar Help'...somebody more computer savvy than me will provide you with the link.

Occurred to me you might be able to draw strength from each other.

Lots of love xxx
 
Lunar Lady

Lunar Lady

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Just asked Midnight to provide a link - Midnight is a genius with these things :hug:
 
Lunar Lady

Lunar Lady

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I'm not a genius :redface:

I believe this is the link that Lunar was trying to find and could not find: Bipolar Help
Thanks Midnight. :hug:

Hope these guys can help each other through - they both sound lovely and it's such a shame they're going through this. :grouphug:
 
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EstherRose94

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Mar 2, 2019
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I seriously doubt she’ll last too long living with her new bf and her sexting friend. Idk if she’s bipolar...kinda sounds like she could be. But either way I have a feeling she’ll be regretting what she’s done and trying to come back to you once she realizes how awful she’s made her situation. Especially since there are kids involved you need to figure out what you’re going to do when she does that. I actually don’t think it’d be a bad idea for you to see a therapist too to help you understand what’s up with her and how you can best handle all this for your kids. Best of luck to you and I’m sure you’ll do a great job with your kiddos just remember to put your wellbeing and the kids’ well-being first no matter how much you want to take care of your wife. She’s an adult and she has to take care of herself. Even if she is bipolar she’s made some really bad decisions that there are no excuses for. I mean she could have just taken up a new hobby or something if she needed a little change. I know you love her but don’t make too many excuses for her you know?
 
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Chris3141

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Apr 9, 2019
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New york
Thanks everyone, I appreciate the help. I did learn one thing in all of this and it's how dependent I have been on her at home. I'm trying to learn to be more independent and will always be there for my kids. I do believe your right and this relationship wont last long and I would love to work things out with her but I think she needs to realize how crappy her life can get as right now they are in the butter fly love stage and that always goes away after awhile. I will be there for her if she comes to her senses but there are going to need to be boundaries. I do hope she atleast wakes up and wants her kids more often and stops thinking about only her happiness. I do still really love her as she was my best friend and we had a good marriage together and I miss her so damn much. But the ball is in her court on whether she gets help and sticks to it.
 
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zusy40

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Sep 27, 2013
Messages
73
She could well be, the hypersexuality, hardly any sleep, feeling high and so great etc, loss of reality by just being so open with you about the cheating like it's not going to hurt you

Trouble is the person who can help her is herself, she needs to see her GP and be referred for an assessment. People with bipolar are also more likely to have post natal depression/psychosis so with her having the depressive episodes in the past maybe this is something she have lived with but only now she's gone too high with the sex stuff. On the other hand it's no excuse for cheating, but in bipolar people do things they would not normally do. Hope she gets some help! With her having family with awareness, the best thing would be it to come from her side of the family - to make her see that she needs to see someone about it.
 
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Chris3141

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I have a friend who went through this with his wife and they are now together again and have 3 kids now. Their relationship is stronger than ever. I hope that is the case in our story but so many things would have to happen. If she really does love me as much as she said before then when she snaps out of this I would hope she would come back. I am a forgiving person so I could get over the cheating as long as she takes the steps to get on medication. I'm just worried that when she snaps to the desire to be in this new fun relationship will stay and she will want him over me. That's her choice but man I still really love her.
 
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Chris3141

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Right now she hates her family. They are appalled by her actions and they think I've been an amazing husband. I really want her to come back but there are alot of things that we would need to work on first. She has an appointment to see someone on the 29th because I asked her too so I hope that helps and she goes through with it but I just dont know what will happen after she gets on meds. I know she didnt have plans on leaving till all this happened as she was talking about our vacation this year and how excited she was. And also talking about planning my 30th birthday. I know this kid is someone she would be attracted to as he is very similar to me and her. We joked when she was being his friend that he was me and her combined in one. I cant imagine with his depression though that they would have a good life especially when She hits the depression stage. I'm afraid though that he will act crazy if she comes back to me. And I'm afraid to that some of my actions during this may have pushed her further away whe. She comes to.
 
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EstherRose94

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It sounds like you’re so sweet and understanding. She’s lucky to have someone like you and hopefully is able to see that again soon.
 
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Chris3141

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New york
I hope so. We had many great memories together but I really think she is hooked on this guy and something tells me that even if she gets on medicine that she will still want to continue this relationship.
 
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