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Help with undiagnosed bipolar 2 wife

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Chris3141

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Apr 9, 2019
Messages
68
Location
New york
I told her that mommy said happy birthday even though she didnt. I hope my kids dont walkway with to many scarres from this but if she keeps acting the way she has been I'm afraid they might end up with many.
 
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Yodagirl

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Mar 9, 2019
Messages
626
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Georgia USA
I told her that mommy said happy birthday even though she didnt. I hope my kids dont walkway with to many scarres from this but if she keeps acting the way she has been I'm afraid they might end up with many.
Yes, they might. But speaking from experience they will also have scars if you guys stay together and things continue like they are. Divorce doesn’t always =Bad
 
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Chris3141

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Apr 9, 2019
Messages
68
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New york
I asked her why and she said she worked till 530 and then went to a restaurant with her bf and that's why she didnt call. Then she wanted me to wake our daughter up so she could wish her happy bday I said no. And havent talked to her since now she is blowing up my phone. I'm so done with this crap...
 
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Yodagirl

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Mar 9, 2019
Messages
626
Location
Georgia USA
I asked her why and she said she worked till 530 and then went to a restaurant with her bf and that's why she didnt call. Then she wanted me to wake our daughter up so she could wish her happy bday I said no. And havent talked to her since now she is blowing up my phone. I'm so done with this crap...
I wouldn’t wake her either. She made a choice now she can deal with the consequence. Stay strong and don’t take her call tonight if that’s at all possible. I’m a mother and have Bipolar 1. My children always have been and always will be #1 in my life!
 
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MisterMichael

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Apr 9, 2019
Messages
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Location
Tennessee
Chris-I feel for you. You will be tormented until you take control of the situation and you might seem to be beginning to. Decide whether you really want a future of this kind and settle in. She is not hiding her indiscretions from you and is really flaunting it in front of 'God and everybody'. She isn't showing you any respect and maybe waiting on you to do what she can't do which is a divorce. However, the mental health aspect is still there but who knows. Cut the $itch out of your life and put restraining order on her. When and if she straightens out to your satisfaction and if she has mental issues then proceed one way which is proving to you that you and the children are worth doing whatever it takes to re-enter their lives. If she is just partying and getting high then cut her off and find someone worthy and wants what you want and have to offer. Life is short and this behavior is not good. If you can deal with it then sit back and let her $hit all over you and take what crumbs of her life she is willing to give you. Trust me - her grip on will slowly fade away once you put a stop to this.
 
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Chris3141

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Apr 9, 2019
Messages
68
Location
New york
Sad thing is, normally she would wish everybody a happy birthday even if they wernt close to us. She was always so excited to wish our kids happy birthday. The fact that she didnt really tells me she has gone off the deep end. Maybe she is BP or maybe not but the fact that she didnt wish her happy bday really tells me she is not in the right mind... and then of course she blamed me for not calling her or saying hey can you call your kid to wish her happy birthday.... lol. But I still told my daughter, mom said happy birthday and that she loves her so if my ex snaps back to reality and figures out that she wants to be a better mom and gets help (counsling, medication, or whatever) hopefully there wont be to much damage to the kids. I'm just glad i got to spend the day with my little munchkins.
 
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Chris3141

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New york
Man that was rough, I stumbled across a folder she made before we had kids. It had so many memories in it. Hit like a brick. She really was amazing...
 
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Yodagirl

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Messages
626
Location
Georgia USA
Man that was rough, I stumbled across a folder she made before we had kids. It had so many memories in it. Hit like a brick. She really was amazing...
Really sorry you’re going through this!
 
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Chris3141

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Apr 9, 2019
Messages
68
Location
New york
Thanks yodagirl, but if anything it's my fault... the one thing I know for sure is she was going through depression. Whether she is BP or not I saw the signs of depression and instead of doing anything to help her I thought It will just go away when the kids go to school and she has more of the adult life she wanted where she could work. I should have had her go to counsling then. It might not have changed anything I dont know but as her husband I should have did something. Being an engineer I research everything to death and instead of researching things for the person I loved I spent it looking into saltwater fishtank and other crap I liked.
 
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Yodagirl

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Messages
626
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Georgia USA
I completely understand how you feel, and maybe you could have been there more. But don’t beat yourself up over it! Hugs
 
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Chris3141

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Apr 9, 2019
Messages
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New york
Also another detail that I forgot. When I caught her sexting the other guy and then she broke down and said i was the greatest thing that has ever happened to her, the guy she was sexting sent me a message and said that he was sorry for everything and that it shouldn't have happened and that my ex has talked so much about me and the kids and how much she loved me. It's why everything was so confusing cuz it was like if she is telling everyone that then why the sudden change.
 
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Yodagirl

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Messages
626
Location
Georgia USA
Also another detail that I forgot. When I caught her sexting the other guy and then she broke down and said i was the greatest thing that has ever happened to her, the guy she was sexting sent me a message and said that he was sorry for everything and that it shouldn't have happened and that my ex has talked so much about me and the kids and how much she loved me. It's why everything was so confusing cuz it was like if she is telling everyone that then why the sudden change.
I hope you get some answers soon.
 
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MisterMichael

Active member
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Apr 9, 2019
Messages
28
Location
Tennessee
You poor man---Remember these rough and trying times. There will be better days and this is only for a season. Just like Winter has passed and Spring is coming---better and happy days are always ahead too. Take care of them babies sir and all else will fall in place. God Bless You and your family.
 
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Chris3141

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Joined
Apr 9, 2019
Messages
68
Location
New york
Well things are getting better. My kids are happier than they have been in a long time as we are doing alot of fun things together and they arnt getting yelled at every 5 min. She came over yesterday to see them for 30 min since she was not able to get them when she said she would be able to. Well I didnt realize it was raining so she came in the house and all she did was talk to me about her new life and yell at the kids. She didnt play with them or anything... I told her about the divorce and some other things and walked away and she got mad I ignored her. I was like I'm not your friend and that she caused this and she blew up and stormed out and then sent me a message saying that it is her fault for how things ended but it's also my fault as I was in the wrong and didnt treat her right and am boring... of course I am, I have 2 kids I take care of. Life is not all parties and bowling ev night etc. I am starting to think she is just in a young life crisis where she thinks life should be all fun. All I know is she is gonna realize fun is expensive and not all its cracked up to be especially as her kids are having alot of fun with me.
 
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