Help with jealousy?

S

Smarto0o

New member
Joined
Jun 17, 2015
Messages
1
Hi there I am new to this forum and wanted to get some advice really.

I believe I have been suffering with depression or bi-polar of some sort and wanted to know whether other people felt the same in certain situations. That way I can tell for sure whether it really is what it is? I've had CBT but feel since finishing in back to square one and it hasn't really made the problems easier just found a reason for them!

I'm in a relationship at the minute and the lows of my life I can deal with when I'm just having difficult days! I have to keep myself busy to stop myself over thinking! But I can't help but compare my life to my partners and think that mine is shit! Every time he has something happy happen to him it just sends me off into a spiral of depression and I get uncontrollably jealous of everything he has. For example, the latest thing is a new car, I've got one on the way and should be excited but all I keep on thinking about is his is ready to collect now and mines going to be shit compared with his and I'm not going to enjoy mine as much and it won't be much of a surprise for me cos I'll have seen what I'm getting already (ordered the same car.) When I hear myself say these things I think of myself as such a selfish dick that doesn't care about wanting his partner to be happy but rather I get what I want so that he can be jealous of me for once (to which he won't he'd be happy for me.) I just feel like on such a day I could be the happiest I've ever been and he'll announce something good and I'll then be depressed and sad that my life's naff! I feel like the jealousy is getting worse and I'm in a competition to see who comes out on top all the time, I feel the inferior one in the relationship but on one of my good days I know I really don't care about that! When I think about it all I also think I should be happy for him being happy like a normal person, even if just a tad jealous but not that jealous that I just end up miserable and don't see the point in living anymore!

Surely this is not right and was wondering whether jealousy affects other people who have depression or anxiety?

Thanks
 
SarahD

SarahD

Well-known member
Joined
Oct 21, 2014
Messages
2,084
Location
UK
Hello Smarto0o

Welcome to the forum. :welcome:

Depression can certainly distort your thinking. Have you thought of looking into different kinds of therapy? There are a lot of them these days, and maybe CBT was not the right one for you.

If a lot of your thoughts centre on your partner and your relationship when you are depressed, maybe some kind of couples counselling might be useful? This is not just for people who are on the point of splitting up. It can help resolve all kind of difficulties. It could help you to look at things differently.

We are not professionals here and may make suggestions only from our own knowledge viewpoint.

However the forum is friendly and good for support. I hope you enjoy using it and find it helpful.

Best wishes, Sarah
 
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