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help with dissociation and never ending loneliness

T

trisarahtops

New member
Joined
Oct 30, 2019
Messages
1
Location
Colorado
Hi fellow forum members.

I just googled BPD forum because quite frankly I am tired of everyone telling me to just deal with being alone or just not understanding the pain that people with BPD go through.

Today I am really just looking for some support. The last week or so I have had some excessive dissociation and I am trying to come up with activities or things that I can do to make it better (at least for a little bit) that doesn't include self harm/bad behaviors(clean for two years btw on that).

I also am trying to battle the feeling of loneliness which has also spiked in the last few weeks due to a betrayal by a friend (sounds dramatic but idc I just need to get over it and don't know how sometimes!)

So if anyone just wants to shoot me a few tips on these specific symptoms I would be greatly appreciative. I just am watching a movie right now and I know I normally come out of my dissociation at some point for days or weeks sometimes months at a time so I just want some help.

Love to all of you out there and I think its really nice this exists because I can't explain how BPD feels truly without explaining to someone who has it as well.

<3-
trisarahtops
 
calypso

calypso

Well-known member
Admin
Moderator
Joined
Jan 5, 2011
Messages
51,905
Location
Lancashire
Hiya. I don't have BPD but I truly sympathise with how terrible it can feel at times. I hope others will be along soon who can give you more definitive answers to your problems.
 
SwanLake

SwanLake

Well-known member
Joined
May 20, 2019
Messages
1,169
Hi fellow forum members.

I just googled BPD forum because quite frankly I am tired of everyone telling me to just deal with being alone or just not understanding the pain that people with BPD go through.

Today I am really just looking for some support. The last week or so I have had some excessive dissociation and I am trying to come up with activities or things that I can do to make it better (at least for a little bit) that doesn't include self harm/bad behaviors(clean for two years btw on that).

I also am trying to battle the feeling of loneliness which has also spiked in the last few weeks due to a betrayal by a friend (sounds dramatic but idc I just need to get over it and don't know how sometimes!)

So if anyone just wants to shoot me a few tips on these specific symptoms I would be greatly appreciative. I just am watching a movie right now and I know I normally come out of my dissociation at some point for days or weeks sometimes months at a time so I just want some help.

Love to all of you out there and I think its really nice this exists because I can't explain how BPD feels truly without explaining to someone who has it as well.

<3-
trisarahtops
Hi ya. Firstly welcome to the forum. You can post any concern on here without fear of judgement. Rest assured you are not alone. I’ve attached a diagram of how BPD affects you, and being detached is in what’s called Hypo mode. Your feelings create thoughts, your thoughts trigger emotions, your emotions trigger negative core beliefs about yourself causing you to act, you will have self destructive coping mechanisms to give you temporary relief from pain.
Anyway I’ve found the best thing is simply to try to remain calm at all times. Search on Mindfulness. It’s the key to recovery through something called DBT (Dialectical Behavioural Therapy). Also try exercise, yoga and meditation. They will all help in controlling your emotions.
 
J

justpeachy59

Member
Joined
Nov 3, 2019
Messages
8
Location
Canada
I can relate to feelings of dissociation and loneliness. I think what's really helpful for battling loneliness is to remember that rejection does not equal loneliness. Being alone doesn't even equal loneliness. Feeling lonely is just that, it's a feeling, and we can change our feelings as long as we want to put in the effort. Your situation sounds tough, it's really hard when people close to us betray us. I think it's easy for us (with BPD) to focus on this feeling of betrayal. Try and make a list of all the things you appreciate about your friends. It doesn't even have to be "good" things. They can be neutral things. And every time you feel hurt and lonely, re-read the list. Sounds cheesy... but it might be enough to push your mind elsewhere.

Much love,
~Peachy
 
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