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Help - should I get it?



New member
Jul 14, 2009
I'm new to this site and I'm in need of some advice.

My mother has had bipolar for years, living with her has been terrible at times. I have clear memories from childhood of some terrible times. But that's in the past, I am now a grown woman with children, a husband and a job.

I have suspected I am bipolar for many years. As I look in to it more I am convinced. When the highs come I really dont careless, everything is great, I spend too much money and believe it will be fine, my sex drive goes nuts, everything is over the top.

Then the downs come and I just want to shut myself away from the world. I dont feel suicidal, but I can spend a weekend in the house and be very happy. The lows make me feel so worthless, a failure both in educational terams, emotional terms, career terms etc...

My dilema... I have an appointment to see th doctor on friday this week. I know I should bring this problem up, I have tired on other occasions but I get a form to fill in about how stressed I am and told to monitor it for months. It just puts me off and I dont go back. I only get the will to bring this problem up once every few years.

Where I work, at the Council, if I go to the doctors on Friday and get referred. That referral will go into a team of people who pass it onto another team and finally another team in the council. All of whom I know and they know me. If I go for help so many people at work will find out.

I am a very private person I dont want these people knowing. In fact it would mean I would want to move jobs but if you're classified as bipolar it's going to be so difficult to get another job - is it? Or am I just assuming too much?

Would it be better for me to just pretend as I have done for years, to see the downs through and pick up the pieces after the highs (the spending etc). Or should I go to the Drs and allow everyone at work to know my problems without needing to tell them.

I really dont know what to do.


Hi Orlando

I'm sorry to hear you are facing difficulties at the moment.

With regards to your GP. Unfortunately most diagnosis of Bipolar have to be based on an established pattern of behaviours. Which is probably why the GP is giving you the form. If you approach them with the problem again, it may be that they will give it to you again. I know they are a pain, but if you would like help for your symptoms based on some form of diagnosis then you may just have to bite the bullet and complete it if they give it to you again. If you can't why not get a member of family to write it based on you telling them how you felt at some point in the evening? Or have a specified time each day where you are committed to writing it. See it as a prescription as it were, if you would like some form of help, and this is only way you are likely to achieve that, then see it as taking some form of prescribed medicine.

I am sure any referral the council get would have minimal details on it, and if it is a first referral I am sure they would not have formulated a diagnosis, you would normally need to see a psychiatrist to get that. It may just say that you are being referred. I'm also sure they would not be allowed to say anything to anyone anyway including you. They would have to treat your referral as confidentially as anyone elses and would be in breach of that if they did.

I know you say you are a private person, however if you broke your leg would you be ashamed of going to work with a plaster on it? It is still an 'illness'. In my opinion MH problems are not problems to be ashamed of in fact one in four people are likely to suffer with a MH problem at some point in their life, so take a look at a quarter of the people you know in your workplace, because it is likely that they have had issues you do not know of.

Any employer that discriminates on the basis of a MH problem is liable for prosecution if your GP/Psyche says that you are able to work, unless there is a particular reason which they would have to explain to you. For example if you have a mental health issue I believe you can not work in the field of MH nursing until you are free of problems for some years because the environment can be stressful and could be triggering for some. But I believe again, this is assessed on an individual basis, not a general rule.


Well-known member
Nov 23, 2008
Belfast, N.Ireland
I can't answer the questions about work as I have not worked for many years and don't know what it is like. Just wishing you luck in finding out if you have Bipolar and with work.
God bless,
Lynnie B

Lynnie B

Well-known member
Jul 12, 2009
Preston, UK

I totally agree with everything Sapphire has said.. Your moods need to be assessed for a period of time and your doctor would need to refer you to a psychiatrist for a proper diagnosis.

But the more you keep putting this off the more your symptoms can delevop and disrupt your life..

As to work, again, as sapphire said it is a recognised illness and cannot be discriminated against.. Just remember its nothing at all to be ashamed of.

Good luck and let us know ho you get on at the docs.. xx:grouphug:
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