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Help ocd

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NicoletteCB

New member
Joined
Jan 19, 2015
Messages
2
Hi everyone! I'm going to skip right to the problem but to put it point blank: I have an obsession with feeling good at the "right" moments, mostly moments having to do with my relationship with my girlfriend (yes I am a lesbian.)

Let me explain now, by feeling "good" I mean sensations in my body, like good feelings or feeling an overwhelming sense of happiness and love. I am obsessed with feeling these emotions/feelings when with my girlfriend when she says something romantic or does something physically romantic that I like (ex: kissing me or holding my hand.) I worry constantly that if I do not get good feelings, so if I feel nothing or get bad/uncomfortable feelings then this means I really don't love my girlfriend and will have to break up with her and must not be gay.

For example if my girlfriend holds my hand and I do not feel any good feelings in me I get a lot of intrusive thoughts and begin to panic and worry that now without the good feelings I cannot enjoy this moments and maybe I will never be able to thus meaning maybe I have to breakup with her when that's my worst nightmare or that maybe I can't feel good because I am not gay enough.

Please help!
 
SomersetScorpio

SomersetScorpio

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 17, 2012
Messages
13,529
Location
The West Country
Hi Nicolette,
I don't suffer with OCD, so I guess I can't really talk from experience.

But what I would say is that it's really natural for people to sometimes not always have 'good feelings' during intimate moments.
That's not to say that someone is feeling bad or that they don't mentally appreciate the holding hands/kisses/etc. at all.
Sometimes our bodies tend to be a bit numb and don't always respond to what's going on. This could be for so many reasons - tiredness, feeling poorly, being distracted.
And sometimes, it's actually anxiety that can makes us feel numb. Our bodies can only deal with so much and so it shuts down.

So yeah, just because our bodies don't always respond in a certain way, it doesn't mean our hearts or our souls don't respond either.
 
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