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HELP: Intrusive Thoughts During Sex

L

Liana

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Am I the only one who is really in her head during sex? It stops me from enjoying it and makes sex very performative and unenjoyable for me. During sex I'll start thinking about my grocery list, about my partner's facial hair I don't like, about my weight gain, about what I look like, about what I have to clean or have disturbing, disgusting, intrusive thoughts about my family members, or other very violent/bizarre un-nameable scenarios. I don't have unusual kinks (I have very low libido, too), so any image that isn't romantic and vanilla-porn-like that pops up in my head (which happens a lot) completely ruins the mood for me.
 
Tawny

Tawny

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Maybe you should not have sex for a while until your head is in a better place?

Are you taking medication?
 
P

Purpleplum

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If you're not getting pleasure out of it (due to low libido) it makes perfect sense that you're thinking of your grocery list. People wouldn't be having sex if there was no pleasure in it.
 
L

Liana

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Maybe you should not have sex for a while until your head is in a better place?

Are you taking medication?
Yes I am, for my BPD/anxiety! Sertraline (also known as Zoloft)
 
V

Vegay

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Hi @Liana I can only speak for my own experience but Sertraline was a very negative experience for me when I was on it. I experienced an even lower mood, increase in suicidal thoughts and definitely more intrusive thoughts in general. (Even after the getting-into-the-system period)
 
L

Liana

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Hi @Liana I can only speak for my own experience but Sertraline was a very negative experience for me when I was on it. I experienced an even lower mood, increase in suicidal thoughts and definitely more intrusive thoughts in general. (Even after the getting-into-the-system period)
For me, when I first started taking it over a year ago, it changed my life for the best. In 1-2 days, my mood had completely switched and my mood swings have definitely balanced out since then. I'm sorry the experience was negative for you! Did you find another alternative that was the right fit?
 
V

Vegay

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Ahh that's good then! I'm glad it had a positive effect for you :) Yes, I am on Citalopram now which has probably been the better medication I have been on
 
D

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I've never been into sex. Even though I've had lots of it. I'll try to avoid it but I always get into situations where it happens. I've been told I'm overly nice and friendly with people which tends to give off the wrong signals. But that's people number 1 purpose in life, having sex. Just a bunch of primal instinctive driven animals. 🤣

I honestly never look at who I'm having sex with. When sex lasts for an hour or so, then I'm literally in a world of my own. I just make sure to say, yes I had an orgasm also.

If what you're feeling is relatively new, my bet is that zoloft you're taking. I was on it but stopped because it made me act and feel like whatever. If I saw nuclear missiles raining down I would have been like. Hmm, well I guess I don't have to cook tonight.

I'm on wellbutrin now.
 
L

Liana

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Location
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I've never been into sex. Even though I've had lots of it. I'll try to avoid it but I always get into situations where it happens. I've been told I'm overly nice and friendly with people which tends to give off the wrong signals. But that's people number 1 purpose in life, having sex. Just a bunch of primal instinctive driven animals. 🤣

I honestly never look at who I'm having sex with. When sex lasts for an hour or so, then I'm literally in a world of my own. I just make sure to say, yes I had an orgasm also.

If what you're feeling is relatively new, my bet is that zoloft you're taking. I was on it but stopped because it made me act and feel like whatever. If I saw nuclear missiles raining down I would have been like. Hmm, well I guess I don't have to cook tonight.

I'm on wellbutrin now.
Ahahahaha that missiles raining down example. My lack of libido and intrusive thoughts were there prior to Zoloft, but thanks for that hint. Also, I'm glad you switched meds and found a better fit :) Thank you for your message!
 
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