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HELP intense mixed feelings

loulabelle

loulabelle

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 17, 2011
Messages
2,487
Location
somewhere over the rainbow
I think im gonna end up S/h ive just had a burst of energy then crashed cant think straight im anxious my head mite actually explode mum found paracetomol next to me and asked what they were doing there i got pissed and said well obviously im about to swallow them for the headache i had 2 hours ago ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh bounce bounce bounve sh sh sh sh bounce depptessed deppressed bounce bounve

anyone there i need to talk
 
F

fallen

Guest
Hi lou,

I can lend you my ear if you need it? lol
Seriously, I'm here if you want to unload what's on your mind.

:hug1:
 
loulabelle

loulabelle

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 17, 2011
Messages
2,487
Location
somewhere over the rainbow
im so lonely i dont have any social life i feel soo fucked up i even looked fucked up now im not the person i was i can see it in my eyes the flames is going out my head feels like it dosent belong to me its not mine, this illness has taken me away and i dont know if i can bring her back or get a person back thats a good person that i can like... im tired of this of being this im tired of bipolar... i just wish it would.go away you know s/h takes the edge of it well the anxiety.....
 
F

fallen

Guest
Aw lou-I know what it is like-I've got no social life either! Perhaps it is time to get out and do something new? I've heard that MIND has group coffee mornings etc where you can meet people in similar situations: Mind, the mental health charity | Mind
Don't let the illness take over your whole life, if possible. People don't need to know about it if you don't want them to. Behind the illness is a fun, caring person who needs to be noticed!
What makes you anxious? Do you take any meds that help with this?

xfallenx
 
loulabelle

loulabelle

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 17, 2011
Messages
2,487
Location
somewhere over the rainbow
ohhhhhhhhhh dam dam dam IT !!!!!!!!!

all im doing on here at the moment it moaning and being 'sick'

im feeling so confused rite now ive had tears and now i need more i feel frustrated and angry at myself for feeling like this i just cant understand the reactions and the feeling that i feel i have no control over..

ive just seen a picture of my ex and his new gf kissing and it actually hit me hard I NEED TO GET OVER HIM then i found out that she uses the same fucking nickname for him that i did, and then i see pictures of him and her at his house and her FB status are from his villiage, i hate him i really really hate him he deleted me from fb beacuse of unresolved issues but why do i still get upset over him i cryed mysefl to sleep over him last night and i HATE HIM i really do but he effects me like this still and it infuriates me that i let this happen also i have just leart that some one in his family has died and this upsets me a bit as well i like her she was a lovely woman with a fantastic personality i will send a card but what i really want to do is go and give his mum a big hug

my head is all over the place i also go upset when they were talking about housing and that i feel like my parents dont want me around anymore again HIS fault i had to move home and now the council have hardly any housing and ive been waiting over a year and im still not getting anywear and i just wanna fall on the floor as a blob crying !!!!!!!

i have medication i can take but i dont have much and my pdoc said i shouldnt take it every day but today i will take some in a minute before i up and leave the house for a change of scenery which will just result in sitting in may car and s/h

i feel so worthless you know i feel worthless because i have no job and no friends and the job thing isnt my fault im too ill to work at the moment my friends all just fucked off im a faliure ive lost everything, ive ruiened everything
:'( im falling apart
 
F

fallen

Guest
Oh, Lou,

Take a deep breath!
You've got a lot of issues going on there-take them one at a time.

Firstly-you are not worthless cos you don't have a job etc. You're ill-give yourself a break. Don't hurt yourself please-it is not the answer. Call the samaritans if you have a strong urge to do so(08457 909090).

Feelings are hard things to deal with especially when it comes to your ex. Perhaps you don't need the reminder that he's moved on. As for the death in his family, if you were close to his mum-maybe you could send her a sympathy card if you want to?

I understand it must be frustrating about the housing but I'm sure that your parents are fine with you sticking around for a while but understand it is maybe difficult sometimes as all families have their squabbles. Do you have an idea where you are on the list? Is there a way you can find out?

And friends-had my fair share of them leave myself-know how bad it feels. In time you will find friends who will appreciate and understand you, I'm sure. For the time being, you've always got us on here to listen and support you.

Take it easy-treat yourself to something nice tonight and chill, if you can.

:hug1:
 
loulabelle

loulabelle

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 17, 2011
Messages
2,487
Location
somewhere over the rainbow
breath taken

i have a lot of issues but its so hard to deal with one at a time some of them are intwined, ill work on that im seeing someone from the phsyc unit tommorrow my support worker and ill just have to bit the bullet and make the call when needed (im usless at picking up the phone)

i will send a card i was very close to his parents and to him at one stage lol

its very frustrating about the housing when you fledge and leave home and then come home again NOT pleasent, the housing is banded where i live a-d d being lowest priority and a highest im on b band but i have been for over a year now i know they cant give houses that they havent got but that still dosent stop be getting frustrated watching other people be given then sooner because they are 'higher' priority i just want to have my space and independence back

thank you for being so nice to me :)

:grouphug:
 
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