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Help for my friend...

F

flowr

New member
Joined
Sep 20, 2020
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3
Location
US
Hi, so I have a friend with Schizophrenia and he is going through stress an a attack right now. We stopped being friends a year ago and we ended on bad terms. I recently messaged him asking if he’s okay because I heard he has Covid-19. He responded saying No he’s not okay and to leave him alone. So I didn’t respond and left it at that.

Then he messaged me the next night, saying “You know what I’ll humor you, whats up. I want to kill myself anyways”

I responded and we ended up calling. He said he was mugged, lost 2 friends to suicide, his best friend left him, caught covid 19 and that he’s alone now and can’t cry or feel anything. He also vented about his ex that hurt him badly last year and that he can hear her voice telling him to kill himself. Then he started talking about how much he hates me and that he doesn’t care about me. I stayed calm, listened, and reassured him. Then his tone calmed down and he started repeating “I’m miserable, -my name-, I’m fucking miserable... I’m a corpse, I’m not worth it, I have no one” then went back to saying he doesn’t care about me. Then he yelled “you removed me last year!” and I assured him that I wouldn’t do that (he was actually the one that removed me.)

Then he asked “what do you want from me” and I said that I want him to live. Then he said he will live for me. Is this a sign I’m helping in any way? but then he called me selfish for it. I asked if he’s okay if I stay, or if he wants me to leave, and he said he doesn’t care.

Am I doing the right thing by staying? He hasn’t removed me from our chatting apps. Im not spamming him, but I sent him one message yesterday saying I’m still here, there’s no pressure, and that I’d like to be beside him in this darkness. Then he said “i don’t know what i am anymore”. I responded saying “you’re you, and it’s okay to be unsure right now.”

Today I checked in again asking if hes okay and reminded him that I care and he responded “how long will you continue this joke for” and I just said “This is not a joke”

Am I doing the right thing? I can’t call for help because we are long distance and i dont know friends or families of his. He did say he will live for me, so is that a sign im doing this right?

I just want to be there with him.
 
Z

Zoe1

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Joined
Jul 8, 2019
Messages
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Nowhere
sounds like he's in no place to consider your feelings at the moment flowr
thats the deal if you stay and take him on
this is something that trained professionals would struggle with

I have to love someone very extremely
to take on that kind of thing
if they are not a relative
 
F

flowr

New member
Joined
Sep 20, 2020
Messages
3
Location
US
sounds like he's in no place to consider your feelings at the moment flowr
thats the deal if you stay and take him on
this is something that trained professionals would struggle with

I have to love someone very extremely
to take on that kind of thing
if they are not a relative
hi thank you for your response
he showed me his music today saying “here, ill humor you with my shitty music” and we talked a little bit. i told him his music is therapeutic and not shitty.

i do love him and i hope im doing the right thing staying.
 
Z

Zoe1

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 8, 2019
Messages
17,504
Location
Nowhere
I think with something like that
if you can love him as he is and not try to change him
and similarly he not try to change you
then the friendship could work
 
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