
miana
Active member
Hi 
I'm not really sure what to say here.. although i go on many forums (mainly for my different animals lol) I'm not used to talking openly about my feelings, so this forum is new ground to me!
I'll try though. A little about me..
I'm 24 and I'm a single mum to my 2 gorgeous boys!
I have suffered depression a while, i would say.. i was around 17 when it started to get really bad, it has been on and off over the years, with me having good months/years and bad. I have been on and off medication since 17yrs old. There are many other things that i have alongside the depression but i choose to ignore these 'get on with life' and put a smile on my face.. as i should do, and i do so well!
Its only lately I'm noticing all my issues when put together are kind of getting a little out of control now, and having just had my second baby 10 weeks ago, I'm starting to struggle to cope alone.
My dad and some close family members know i suffer depression and know i have previous issues with self harm and eating disorders (although they only knows as much as i let them), but they don't know the full extent of how i feel day to day. My mood swings, impulsiveness; especially with regards to buying things i don't need nor really want, getting into debt.. then paranoia and anxiety, irrational thoughts and very low self confidence and self worth. I'm scared to talk about it in case i just get told to 'get a grip' and to 'think about my children' as these comments only trigger more depression, i don't deal with criticism/rejection well at all, blowing the smallest of things all out of proportion, so comments like that would only make me doubt myself more than i do already.. hence its usually easier to keep it all to myself. I know its more than just depression but i don't know what to do or where to go for help. I feel I'll be letting everyone down, more so my children, and i have no one to talk to about it..
So here i am, hoping i can talk to people who may understand, and even if not, then to just be there to support and not judge..
Anyway look forward to chatting with you all
Simone
xx

I'm not really sure what to say here.. although i go on many forums (mainly for my different animals lol) I'm not used to talking openly about my feelings, so this forum is new ground to me!
I'll try though. A little about me..

I'm 24 and I'm a single mum to my 2 gorgeous boys!

I have suffered depression a while, i would say.. i was around 17 when it started to get really bad, it has been on and off over the years, with me having good months/years and bad. I have been on and off medication since 17yrs old. There are many other things that i have alongside the depression but i choose to ignore these 'get on with life' and put a smile on my face.. as i should do, and i do so well!
Its only lately I'm noticing all my issues when put together are kind of getting a little out of control now, and having just had my second baby 10 weeks ago, I'm starting to struggle to cope alone.
My dad and some close family members know i suffer depression and know i have previous issues with self harm and eating disorders (although they only knows as much as i let them), but they don't know the full extent of how i feel day to day. My mood swings, impulsiveness; especially with regards to buying things i don't need nor really want, getting into debt.. then paranoia and anxiety, irrational thoughts and very low self confidence and self worth. I'm scared to talk about it in case i just get told to 'get a grip' and to 'think about my children' as these comments only trigger more depression, i don't deal with criticism/rejection well at all, blowing the smallest of things all out of proportion, so comments like that would only make me doubt myself more than i do already.. hence its usually easier to keep it all to myself. I know its more than just depression but i don't know what to do or where to go for help. I feel I'll be letting everyone down, more so my children, and i have no one to talk to about it..
So here i am, hoping i can talk to people who may understand, and even if not, then to just be there to support and not judge..
Anyway look forward to chatting with you all

Simone
xx