Hello

[Lillie10]

Hello everyone,

I am new here and need to say a few things right now to get my anger and frustration out.
So, please excuse my ignorance towards this site.

I have been suffering from severe depression now for about six years and feel like I am going no where. I won't go into my past problems vs now problems.

I just want to scream and shout! I want to tell everyone to leave me alone.
I want someone to hear me. I want some one to hug me... But I don't want to be touched. don't judge me until you have been there yourself and don't feel sorry for me. Just hear me!
I am shattered in little pieces and cannot be put back together.
Try as I might but I keeping cracking. I wonder if I will actually get through this. I so often want to give up. I feel paranoid, lost, hurt and anger.
I have no idea what to do with all that is built up inside me. I feel like I am going to explode.

I hate that I am unable to sleep because I am so miserable. Thinking of my past. can't change it. I can't even patch it together. I feel like I am losing it.
I am so tired of feeling the hate, hurt and anger.

I talk and talk to my psychiatrist and feel like I am at a dead end. Where do I go from here?
How long can I go on feeling like this. I can only take so much and I have taken a lot. I need it all to end...

Working is so hard when you feel this dispair. But I must carry on. I have to work to support myself. Sometimes, I think about how nice it would be to have soneone tell you it's ok and I don't have to work.
So many hardships. I know others go through the same thing and I am not exempt. I just want to be exempt. For a little while anyway.


I need to feel free, to let go.

No need to reply. I needed to say this.

Looking for peace.
Lillie

 

[Topaz]

I understand It's always good to get it out

Welcome to the forum hope it is a source of help for you

 

[*Sapphire*]

Hi Lillie

And to the forum.

I have suffered with depression for many years too experiencing such intense emotions similar to yours, but I am seeing the end of it now after giving up many a time, things can get better.

I found learning the skill of radical acceptance really helpful. It is really difficult to do but it is possible.

I hope you find the forum of some use here, there is a wealth of knowledge, support and experience to be found here

 

[PlaceboEffect]

I hope it helped a little to get it out... and I hope one day you find peace from depression.

PlaceboEffect

 

[gemini_angel]

Hope you posting that helped....even if it was a pinch.

 

[Jolene]

Hi Lilli

Totaly understand what You feel like, it's good to get things out

welcome to the forum

Have Fun

 

[Lillie10]

Thank you

Thank you for all this support. I am feeling a little overwhelmed by the support. I am not used to it.
I do appreciate it though.
A great welcome to the site.

I feel a little better today.
Take care all and again thanks.
Have a nice day!

Lillie