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G

galeleo

Member
Joined
Oct 16, 2021
Messages
11
Location
Vancouver, BC
Last week I received a Termination of Lease from my condo board. My next door neighbour tortured me by slamming her door up to 17 times per day for 4 months. I suffered anxiety attacks, sleep deprivation, and a nervous breakdown. I knocked on her door to ask if we could discuss her door, but she slammed her door in my face and complained to the board that I was harassing her. I have been victimized many times by this neighbour and my downstairs neighbour and their lies, which culminated in their current attempt to kick me out of my home. I have no friends, no family, or anyone to be kind to me. It hurts so much to be misunderstood, distrusted, and abused. All because I complained about their behaviour. And the anger. The anger towards the board is overwhelming at times. I feel so alone. Today was bad. I had difficulty keeping physical balance and fell on the sidewalk scraping both knees badly. I write a lot. I'm sorry.
 
2

2Much2Feel

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 24, 2021
Messages
1,972
Location
US
Hey, @galeleo, welcome to the forum. I'm sorry to hear you're going through all this stress. A bad neighbour can certainly be a huge source of stress and also cause us to feel uncomfortable in our own homes. It's good you reached out here, a great start. Can I ask if you're working with anyone professionally for all this and/or have a diagnosis?

Again, welcome to the forum, glad you found it and hope you find it helpful. xx
 
G

galeleo

Member
Joined
Oct 16, 2021
Messages
11
Location
Vancouver, BC
Hey, @galeleo, welcome to the forum. I'm sorry to hear you're going through all this stress. A bad neighbour can certainly be a huge source of stress and also cause us to feel uncomfortable in our own homes. It's good you reached out here, a great start. Can I ask if you're working with anyone professionally for all this and/or have a diagnosis?

Again, welcome to the forum, glad you found it and hope you find it helpful. xx
Thank you, 2Much2Feel. I am very stressed out because my neighbours don't have a conscience so they continue and that's against the bylaws here, but the board doesn't want to do anything because these two neighbours are friends of theirs.

I was professionally diagnosed with PTSD, Fibromyalgia, Chronic Fatigue Immune Dysfunction Syndrome, and severe clinical depression in 1996 after I was bullied every day for 2 years by a clique of young students who lied to try to get me kicked out of the school. Their first victim dropped out. I supported him, so I was their next victim. As a result of those illnesses, I was unable to work for 10 years and existed thanks to Disability Benefits.

Please, everyone, seek help as soon as you feel yourself falling.

So I am being bullied again and the bullies have won.

My neighbour's noise has caused me to make a lot of complaints to the board - some of them angry, accusing them of croneyism and favouritism. I am much too outspoken and so they want to get rid of me. But a previous resident suffered asthma when a next door neighbour here smoked pot and cigarettes in his suite. His sister was a board member, so the board did nothing. The poor woman had to sell and move out, but after she did she sued the board and won. It's a toxic environment. Everyone is afraid to speak out because they will be targeted by a cruel and sadistic board.

I am distraught, of course. I feel so alone and tired.

Regarding professionals... no, I cannot find any who will take me on. Psychologists cost $200 per hour and are not covered by health insurance here. I am retired and can't afford that. All the psychiatrists are booked and not taking new patients. I rely on the Crisis Centre Hotline, which I have called over 100 times in the past 5 years and maybe 50 times this past year.

Thank you for being here. I'm sorry for going on so much. I hate how this state makes one so self-absorbed.
 
2

2Much2Feel

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 24, 2021
Messages
1,972
Location
US
Thank you, 2Much2Feel. I am very stressed out because my neighbours don't have a conscience so they continue and that's against the bylaws here, but the board doesn't want to do anything because these two neighbours are friends of theirs.

I was professionally diagnosed with PTSD, Fibromyalgia, Chronic Fatigue Immune Dysfunction Syndrome, and severe clinical depression in 1996 after I was bullied every day for 2 years by a clique of young students who lied to try to get me kicked out of the school. Their first victim dropped out. I supported him, so I was their next victim. As a result of those illnesses, I was unable to work for 10 years and existed thanks to Disability Benefits.

Please, everyone, seek help as soon as you feel yourself falling.

So I am being bullied again and the bullies have won.

My neighbour's noise has caused me to make a lot of complaints to the board - some of them angry, accusing them of croneyism and favouritism. I am much too outspoken and so they want to get rid of me. But a previous resident suffered asthma when a next door neighbour here smoked pot and cigarettes in his suite. His sister was a board member, so the board did nothing. The poor woman had to sell and move out, but after she did she sued the board and won. It's a toxic environment. Everyone is afraid to speak out because they will be targeted by a cruel and sadistic board.

I am distraught, of course. I feel so alone and tired.

Regarding professionals... no, I cannot find any who will take me on. Psychologists cost $200 per hour and are not covered by health insurance here. I am retired and can't afford that. All the psychiatrists are booked and not taking new patients. I rely on the Crisis Centre Hotline, which I have called over 100 times in the past 5 years and maybe 50 times this past year.

Thank you for being here. I'm sorry for going on so much. I hate how this state makes one so self-absorbed.
I know, I feel the same way, self absorbed b/c when it's really bad, it's really hard to pull yourself out of your head. Survival mode I guess. In any case, what are the chances of moving? I know it's a horrible thought, I just went through it a few months back and it nearly broke me. But I couldn't stand to listen to my abusive neighbour yelling at the top of his lungs any longer. And it helped.

I know moving is expensive and difficult in a million ways, and likely you would if you could. It's just so hard to not be able to even relax in your own place. The lack of MH care availability and all is one of the most frustrating things to read about on this forum, just cannot believe it.

So reaching out here is good. You'll find a lot of support and hopefully someone who can offer good advice. I just got addicted to wearing earplugs and had a few moments where I lost it w him as well; it's easy to do under these high tension situations. xx
 
G

galeleo

Member
Joined
Oct 16, 2021
Messages
11
Location
Vancouver, BC
I know, I feel the same way, self absorbed b/c when it's really bad, it's really hard to pull yourself out of your head. Survival mode I guess. In any case, what are the chances of moving? I know it's a horrible thought, I just went through it a few months back and it nearly broke me. But I couldn't stand to listen to my abusive neighbour yelling at the top of his lungs any longer. And it helped.

I know moving is expensive and difficult in a million ways, and likely you would if you could. It's just so hard to not be able to even relax in your own place. The lack of MH care availability and all is one of the most frustrating things to read about on this forum, just cannot believe it.

So reaching out here is good. You'll find a lot of support and hopefully someone who can offer good advice. I just got addicted to wearing earplugs and had a few moments where I lost it w him as well; it's easy to do under these high tension situations. xx
Thank you so much for the thoughtful reply. You're right. I must move. I know it. It will be a struggle because of the sleep deprivation. Right now, it seems insurmountable, but it's not. It just feels that way because I realized that the bullies won, again. They took control of my happiness, health, and life. The only way to break free of their grip and cruelty is to move.

I've been in an abusive relationship with 8 people for the past 5 years. I should have moved after Round 1, but like a typical abuse victim, I kept thinking the situation would improve and that my abusers would stop.

I've worn custom made ear plugs for the past 5 years I have lived here, but bass sounds such as door slamming go through them. Ear plugs plus white noise work a bit better. There is a free white noise website where you can use their preset white noises to stream or create your own. They also have waves and rain and other sounds that seem quite natural.

The evening of the day I got the Termination of Lease, the downstairs neighbour stopped slamming her window. It was all intentional. I hate her.

I hired a lawyer to day so that I won't have to deal with the board. He's twice the cost of most lawyers, but he's nearby and he is a good man. His words to me after reading the false accusations of my neighbours in the Termination of Lease letter were, "These people are crazy. You've got to get out of there."

I tried to reason with them, but you can't reason with cruel, sadistic bullies because they have no conscience.

I will leave word with someone that I am willing to support their next victim, but from a safe distance.
 
Bod

Bod

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 19, 2021
Messages
7,848
Location
Pretty Good
Welcome to the forum, I am sorry you have neighbours like that as we have just managed to get the help we needed here because of our neighbours. I hope you will find this forum helpful to you as we all care.
 
2

2Much2Feel

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 24, 2021
Messages
1,972
Location
US
Thank you so much for the thoughtful reply. You're right. I must move. I know it. It will be a struggle because of the sleep deprivation. Right now, it seems insurmountable, but it's not. It just feels that way because I realized that the bullies won, again. They took control of my happiness, health, and life. The only way to break free of their grip and cruelty is to move.

I've been in an abusive relationship with 8 people for the past 5 years. I should have moved after Round 1, but like a typical abuse victim, I kept thinking the situation would improve and that my abusers would stop.

I've worn custom made ear plugs for the past 5 years I have lived here, but bass sounds such as door slamming go through them. Ear plugs plus white noise work a bit better. There is a free white noise website where you can use their preset white noises to stream or create your own. They also have waves and rain and other sounds that seem quite natural.

The evening of the day I got the Termination of Lease, the downstairs neighbour stopped slamming her window. It was all intentional. I hate her.

I hired a lawyer to day so that I won't have to deal with the board. He's twice the cost of most lawyers, but he's nearby and he is a good man. His words to me after reading the false accusations of my neighbours in the Termination of Lease letter were, "These people are crazy. You've got to get out of there."

I tried to reason with them, but you can't reason with cruel, sadistic bullies because they have no conscience.

I will leave word with someone that I am willing to support their next victim, but from a safe distance.
Yes, it is more than possible. It took me about 5 years to finally get up the energy to do it, and now at least I have some peace of mind, my furthest neighbour is a couple acres away, so I hear nothing. It is so worth it. We all need our place of refuge.

I go from 0 to 90 in about 10 seconds when dealing with people like that neighbour of yours. It really grates on your mental health over time, so it's so healthy for you to get out of there. And good for you for getting a good attorney on it. That can be the best feeling when you prevail on a legal matter when someone is being ridiculous.

Let us know how it goes if you can. Pulling for you. xx
 
G

galeleo

Member
Joined
Oct 16, 2021
Messages
11
Location
Vancouver, BC
Welcome to the forum, I am sorry you have neighbours like that as we have just managed to get the help we needed here because of our neighbours. I hope you will find this forum helpful to you as we all care.
That's wonderful. Thank you for the inspiration and concern.
 
G

galeleo

Member
Joined
Oct 16, 2021
Messages
11
Location
Vancouver, BC
Yes, it is more than possible. It took me about 5 years to finally get up the energy to do it, and now at least I have some peace of mind, my furthest neighbour is a couple acres away, so I hear nothing. It is so worth it. We all need our place of refuge.

I go from 0 to 90 in about 10 seconds when dealing with people like that neighbour of yours. It really grates on your mental health over time, so it's so healthy for you to get out of there. And good for you for getting a good attorney on it. That can be the best feeling when you prevail on a legal matter when someone is being ridiculous.

Let us know how it goes if you can. Pulling for you. xx
Thank you so much for your thoughtful reply. It means a lot to me and it's really very helpful. Sometimes, one cannot win and just has to move on.
 
G

galeleo

Member
Joined
Oct 16, 2021
Messages
11
Location
Vancouver, BC
Welcome to the forum, I am sorry you have neighbours like that as we have just managed to get the help we needed here because of our neighbours. I hope you will find this forum helpful to you as we all care.
Thank you, Bod.

You had problem neighbours, too? It's been awful. Half of every day, I'm angry. The other half, I'm sad. Because it has been so unfair. A resident down the hallway from me called me this evening. She said her neighbours are very quiet. The neighbours on both sides of me and below me must be the worst neighbours in the building. Such bad luck. Can you please tell me, if you care to, how you handled your neighbours?
 
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