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Hello.

H

Harizon

New member
Joined
Sep 16, 2021
Messages
1
Location
Germany
Hi,

First of all I would like to say that english is not my native language, so there will me some spelling/grammar mistakes in here. I'm 22 years old and from germany.
The following text I wrote down yesterday when everything just came together again. I wrote it down in german but decided to translate it and share it here since I just don't know what to do anymore.

"why am i so sad?
i don't know when was the last time i could just be at peace
constantly only problems and worries
there is never a break there is always something new
and I just can't manage to get rid of them
I am crushed from all sides
I would like to do so much
I would like to create my own world, i would like to just live happily
does everyone think like me?
i don't manage to reach my goals because the way to achieving them just seems unfeasible
there are so many people better than me no matter what i do and no matter what i would do, so why should i try?
i'm not giving up and i'm not going to give up but it feels more and more like i'm just trapped in a movie and it's not real
i think to myself all the time, when will the turn come, when will something finally come that fulfills me
where i can be 100% behind it, where i can invest 100% of my time without getting bored, without feeling like i am just an unimportant part of what i want so much to do
i just want to be free, free from thoughts that plague me every day, that make me think every day how the next day will look like
i don't understand it, i'm fine, i live in a rich country, i can't complain, my family supports me even if there are difficulties sometimes
yet i have so many problems that they don't know about
i can't go on like this, i don't know what to do, i don't know where to start, everything seems pointless, like a flame surrounded by dark mass, even though i know i will never extinguish this flame myself i am afraid, i am afraid of dying without having accomplished anything meaningful"

I guess this is the wrong topic to write all that since it is supposed to be an introduction thread. But I just felt like writing it down and maybe someone knows how to deal with this feelings.
 
Bod

Bod

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 19, 2021
Messages
5,774
Location
Planet POSITIVE
Hello Harizon, welcome to the forum I hope you can find the answers here and get the help you may need plus it might be a good idea to see your doctor and have a talk with them as they might be able to help you too.
 
Anime-Alchemy

Anime-Alchemy

Well-known member
Joined
Oct 21, 2013
Messages
6,951
Location
A comet
Hello Harizon, welcome to the forum.
 
S

sadgirl

Well-known member
Joined
May 25, 2012
Messages
2,255
Location
in my own private hell
Hi harizon and welcome to the forum please feel free to look around and post whenever you can
 
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