• Welcome! If you'd like to talk with people who know what it's like

Hello

J

jooblue

Guest
Hello :)

I signed up yesterday after looking for a forum online. I've been "depressed" for five years, and currently under assessment as there's a question mark over being bipolar.

I was raped (not the ideal way to lose your virginity) and then leapt into breif marriage with someone who couldn't/wouldn't understand, and unfortunately took a controlling and manipulative attitude towards me. He also lived on the other side of the law, and I eventually rolled up to Heathrow and jumped on a plane to Germany. For no particular reason.

I've learnt I can't run away from how I feel, and that no matter how much I want to just snap out of it, I can't. I am also slowly accepting that it wasn't my fault, even though that's still not easy to write that, and I really want to give you a list of why I think it probably is my fault.

Luckily I get good days in between the bad days so have taken the opportunity to write while I am not feeling really really low. Hope I can help others with ways of getting through it, and hope to grab a bit of support when I know I, at some point, will go down like a lead balloon.

Thanks for the welcome on the Forum - appreciate it. :tea: (bigg fan of tea)
 
Rorschach

Rorschach

Well-known member
Founding Member
Joined
Dec 19, 2007
Messages
1,149
Location
W2
Hey there jooblue. Welcome to the boards...

:welcome:
 
daffy

daffy

Well-known member
Moderator
Founding Member
Staff Member on Leave
Joined
Dec 16, 2007
Messages
21,357
Location
hiding behind the sofa
Hello and welcome jooblue:welcome:



No one deserves to be raped. I think thats your way of trying to cope. You dont say if you have had councelling to discuss your feelings cos i think you definatly need it. Am i right in assuming that the depression came on as a result of the rape. If so there is a lot that can be done for you. Medication will only supress it. You need a person experienced in this field to help you come to terms with your ordeal.

I dont know whether u are seeing a psych or a gp bu i really think councelling could help

take carexxx
:grouphug:
 
J

jooblue

Guest
Thanks for the welcome guys.

It's weird because I would probably say the same to anyone else - that it wasn't their fault - but somehow I've been convinced that it’s different for me. I was referred to a counsellor fairly soon after the event, but you got six sessions and then cut off because of funding, and I felt obliged to “feel better” by the end of those, that’s crazy isn’t it? My gp has recently offered me another route into counselling and I’m thinking about it, I suppose I’ve wanted the option that seems easiest, to take a pill and make it all go away but it doesn’t.

Yeah, I think you’re right, I’m just suppressing issues that aren’t going to disappear by magic. I think I want control over how I feel, and so if I tell myself I can deal with it, then I can. And then I wonder why I can’t and it’s really frustrating and I end up feeling like a failure on top of everything else.

You speak a lot of sense, I guess I’ll have to bite the bullet on this one.
:)
 
Fedup

Fedup

Well-known member
Founding Member
Joined
Dec 18, 2007
Messages
1,937
c009.gif and :welcome: jooblue .
Hope you like it here c014.gif
 
Similar threads
Thread starter Title Forum Replies Date
nenexx Hello there my friends! Introduce Yourself 7
B Hello Introduce Yourself 6
I Hi. Just A Quick Hello Introduce Yourself 5
B Hello! New to this forum. Introduce Yourself 6
A Hello!! Introduce Yourself 8
Gabriel Czar Hello Introduce Yourself 6
T Hello everyone, Introduce Yourself 5
D A big hello to everybody from here on the East Coast. Introduce Yourself 4
R Hello! Introduce Yourself 17
bpdreamlover hello, glad to be here. Introduce Yourself 6
Teardrop Hello Everyone... Introduce Yourself 17
M Hello,,just joined. Introduce Yourself 21
O Hello, I've just joined. Introduce Yourself 7
B Hello, I'm new here Introduce Yourself 4
T Hello All Introduce Yourself 4
S Hello Introduce Yourself 6
K Hello! Introduce Yourself 4
L Hello Introduce Yourself 1
L Hello Introduce Yourself 4
ChaosSymphony Hello! I am new to the board and I just started therapy Introduce Yourself 3
Bod Hello from Mr Lonely Introduce Yourself 12
S Hi, i have SA and schizoid. Just saying hello. Introduce Yourself 4
C Hello Introduce Yourself 7
B Hello, am I failure Introduce Yourself 13
catmommy Hello, I'm catmommy Introduce Yourself 8
N Hello, I'm natu Introduce Yourself 5
M Hello im molly Introduce Yourself 15
Ghibli Hello. Introduce Yourself 16
U Hello New to the forum. Introduce Yourself 11
A Hello, I'm looking for advice Introduce Yourself 4
H Hello Introduce Yourself 4
S Hello Introduce Yourself 4
J Hello just joined mental health forum. Introduce Yourself 12
A Hello Introduce Yourself 9
S Hello everyone Introduce Yourself 5
L hello,, i am lost Introduce Yourself 5
Door Hello Introduce Yourself 10
K Hello all! Introduce Yourself 6
Novastars Hello, hello to you. Introduce Yourself 9
M Saying hello as I'm new! Introduce Yourself 9
K New to this. Hello Introduce Yourself 7
T Hello everyone Introduce Yourself 5
L Hello all Introduce Yourself 6
M Hello All. Introduce Yourself 8
K hello Introduce Yourself 6
S Hello Introduce Yourself 4
O Hello everyone Introduce Yourself 7
F Hello Everyone. Not sure but I try this, too Introduce Yourself 11
C Hello! I’m brand new 💖 Introduce Yourself 3
B Hello Introduce Yourself 2

Similar threads

Top