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Nad2020

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My 22 y old daughter suffers from anxiety, she still lives with us. She cannot bear me going away and I need help, I don’t know what to do
 
calypso

calypso

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:welcome: to the forum. I am sorry that you are going through this, and you sound desperate. Can you tell us more about her and your relationship? Has she had any interventions to help her? Any therapy or medications?
 
N

Nad2020

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:welcome: to the forum. I am sorry that you are going through this, and you sound desperate. Can you tell us more about her and your relationship? Has she had any interventions to help her? Any therapy or medications?
Hello, thank you for your reply, it is true I feel desperate. She has everything going for her and I have supported her as much as I can... She is undergoing psychotherapy for almost 5 years now and for the past two year she is under anti depressants. She has progressed a lot and I am thankful and proud but lately changes are happening in our family which will require me to travel a lot. My husband (her stepdad) is starting a wonderful new job position abroad and I am due to travel with him for 10 days this weekend to help him settle but she is asking me not to go or come along because she knows she will have panic attacks, and when she is in that mindset which I understand is beyond her control, she will have those panic attacks that can last for days...even though she is not left alone in the house and she goes to university everyday... here I am stuck between the both of them... i am heartbroken to see her like this, she is a brilliant beautiful young woman, top of her class... 😢
 
calypso

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That is quite a quandary isn't it? Is there anyone else who can stay with her and help her through this time? I don't know what Belgium is like, but here in Britain we have a Crisis Team. Do you have anything like that? The psychiatrist or doctor has to refer you but they can come in daily to check on vulnerable people. Can her therapist be available a little more during this time?

But I feel for you caught between two needs. I can't advise you as I don't know the actual situation, just say that I feel strongly that you are caught here. I am so sorry.
 
midnightphoenix

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Hi and welcome to the forum, we're happy to have you here :welcome:

Is there anyone who can stay with her while you are away? i am so sorry you are dealing with that:hug:
 
N

Nad2020

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Location
Belgium
That is quite a quandary isn't it? Is there anyone else who can stay with her and help her through this time? I don't know what Belgium is like, but here in Britain we have a Crisis Team. Do you have anything like that? The psychiatrist or doctor has to refer you but they can come in daily to check on vulnerable people. Can her therapist be available a little more during this time?

But I feel for you caught between two needs. I can't advise you as I don't know the actual situation, just say that I feel strongly that you are caught here. I am so sorry.
Thank you for your kind words, it is heartwarming. I have spoken to her therapist and she will be available for her. I sure hope everything will go well and that she will not have panic attacks during my absence.
 
N

Nad2020

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Hi and welcome to the forum, we're happy to have you here :welcome:

Is there anyone who can stay with her while you are away? i am so sorry you are dealing with that:hug:
Thank you for your reply. Her younger sister is staying with her and she has her boyfriend that could also come and comfort her but she says I am the only one that makes her feel safe during her panic attacks...
 
midnightphoenix

midnightphoenix

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Thank you for your reply. Her younger sister is staying with her and she has her boyfriend that could also come and comfort her but she says I am the only one that makes her feel safe during her panic attacks...
she needs to learn how to cope without you, cause how will she cope if she has one when you are not there and cannot go to her? :hug:
 
N

Nad2020

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she needs to learn how to cope without you, cause how will she cope if she has one when you are not there and cannot go to her? :hug:
You are absolutely right and I know that but it’s always good to hear it from someone else. I shall go ahead with my travel plans even if I feel guilty about leaving her but I pray and hope she will not have major panic attacks while I am away. Besides she can always reach me and I will always be there for her. I just hope she will be cured from her anxiety. Mental illnesses are so hard to understand and mysterious sometimes... I keep asking myself why she has it, did I do anything wrong while raising her but I suppose I will never know...
 
R_Sxo

R_Sxo

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Welcome!x

I'd agree with Midnight - as hard as it is, she will need to learn to cope with you at some point - you won't always be around to help her. It's a tricky onex

Much love <3
 
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