• Welcome! It’s great to see you.

    If you'd like to talk with people who know what it's like

    Our forum members are people, maybe like yourself, who experience mental health difficulties or who have had them at some point in their life.

Hello to all.

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Lucretius

New member
Joined
Jan 24, 2021
Messages
3
Location
UK
Hi everyone,

I have literally just joined this wonderful forum and I’m hoping I get some help and guidance. 🙂

My wife has OCD which invades and controls every aspect of our lives. Believe it or not we have been living with this for nearly 20 years, but it’s now getting to the stage where every day is a challenge and I cannot go on like this. I had a ‘breakdown’ last year and had to have two months off work and a lot of therapy to recover. I have come to realise that the intolerable home situation was a large part (although not all) of the breakdown. It desperately needs sorting but it seems impossible when your partner actively makes it SO hard to approach the subject.

I don't want to relate my whole story on my first post, but I'd welcome some guidance on how to proceed on the forum to start getting support from fellow members. 😊
 
R

RayHendrix

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 21, 2021
Messages
121
Location
Austria
Hi Lucretius :) Welcome to the forum!
I don´t really have experience with something like this and doubt I can be very helpfull. Sounds like something very difficult to cope with. Maybe someone else here has more to offer :)
Are you still in Therapy? Don´t forget to watch after yourself :) Your mental-health is as important ;)
 
JessisMe

JessisMe

Well-known member
Joined
Feb 27, 2020
Messages
6,586
Location
Nashua NH
Hi Lucretius it sounds like your home life has a lot of stressors in it. I’m so sorry for that. Have you and your wife tried couples counseling? I would think with your breakdown last year she would be receptive to doing anything that would help get you back to feeling better again. Have you ever talked with her about how her OCD affects you at all?
 
L

Lucretius

New member
Joined
Jan 24, 2021
Messages
3
Location
UK
Hi Lucretius :) Welcome to the forum!
I don´t really have experience with something like this and doubt I can be very helpfull. Sounds like something very difficult to cope with. Maybe someone else here has more to offer :)
Are you still in Therapy? Don´t forget to watch after yourself :) Your mental-health is as important ;)
Thank you for your encouraging words. 😊 I am having a small amount of therapy provided by employer but that will stop soon. I may well seek out longer term therapy privately as I can't help my wife solve her issues unless I have some support myself.
 
L

Lucretius

New member
Joined
Jan 24, 2021
Messages
3
Location
UK
Hi Lucretius it sounds like your home life has a lot of stressors in it. I’m so sorry for that. Have you and your wife tried couples counseling? I would think with your breakdown last year she would be receptive to doing anything that would help get you back to feeling better again. Have you ever talked with her about how her OCD affects you at all?
Thank you for your kind words. Unfortunately my wife is rather wrapped up in her own worries; OCD, anxiety, lockdown and lack of success trying for another child (therein lies another story). Sadly I seem to come way down the list. When I do bring up the subject of the OCD (like I'd did this morning) she gets angry, I then get angry, and it's very hard to get anywhere. She has agreed to get therapy but I have to organise it (she won't) so I have my doubts whether she really wants to change. I need a plan of action. 😕 Thanks it's helping to talk. 🙂
 
UpnDwn1978

UpnDwn1978

Well-known member
Forum Guide
Joined
Jun 16, 2020
Messages
5,468
Location
Norway
Hi Lucretius welcome to the forum :welcome:
 
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