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Hello There!

Z

zte13

New member
Joined
Nov 7, 2021
Messages
3
Location
Bulgaria
Hi I'm a 22y M.
Im an introvert with anxiety, depression and alot of other CRAP since 15-16 years old, but for now thease will be my main focus. Over the years its getting worse and worse. Its got to the point now that suicide is on my thoughts daily.
I feel like i can't do anything right. I've lost motivation to do anything for my future i just live day for day.
I have problems with socializing with others and thus i've grown to hate making new friends. The friends i have now are from long before...i've made some recent friendships and to be honest i dont know how (i consider them luck on my side)

I've gone to therapy before for like a month or two but i was too afraid to do what the therapist advised me and just quit. Now I'm at a point that i have to do something or thats gonna be the end of me.
So i figured as a first step i should join this forum.
I plan to go to therapist in the near future but for now one step at a time.
 
NWiddi

NWiddi

Well-known member
Moderator
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Messages
10,378
Location
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I'm sorry to hear about your suicidal thoughts, you've made an excellent first step reaching out here and I hope some of our members will come along to support you.

If things get really tough please consider contacting the Bulgarian Red Cross or head to your GP or nearest hospital and tell them how you're feeling.
Please take good care of yourself.
 
B

Bod

Former member
Joined
Jul 19, 2021
Messages
7,860
Location
Pretty Good
Hello zte13, welcome to the forum I am sorry you are suffering at this time and that you could not get on with therapy, on a good note it is good that you have reached out here as we are a helpful and caring set of people.
 
Tawny

Tawny

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Nov 10, 2019
Messages
13,358
Location
England
Hi I'm a 22y M.
Im an introvert with anxiety, depression and alot of other CRAP since 15-16 years old, but for now thease will be my main focus. Over the years its getting worse and worse. Its got to the point now that suicide is on my thoughts daily.
I feel like i can't do anything right. I've lost motivation to do anything for my future i just live day for day.
I have problems with socializing with others and thus i've grown to hate making new friends. The friends i have now are from long before...i've made some recent friendships and to be honest i dont know how (i consider them luck on my side)

I've gone to therapy before for like a month or two but i was too afraid to do what the therapist advised me and just quit. Now I'm at a point that i have to do something or thats gonna be the end of me.
So i figured as a first step i should join this forum.
I plan to go to therapist in the near future but for now one step at a time.
welcome

This was a good first step to make because I know you will get so much support here.

one day at a time is how I live too. It is a good way to do things I think.

what did the therapist advise you to do? Remember that is just one opinion, one suggestion.

what do you feel would help you live a happier life? Is life stressful.

those with suicidal thoughts do need to reduce stress as much as possible in life.

what gets you through the day?

I wish I had some wise words. Please know we care how you feel and want to support you in feeling strong enough to keep going until you did naturally of old age. Life is so short and goes so fast.
 
Z

zte13

New member
Joined
Nov 7, 2021
Messages
3
Location
Bulgaria
welcome

This was a good first step to make because I know you will get so much support here.

one day at a time is how I live too. It is a good way to do things I think.

what did the therapist advise you to do? Remember that is just one opinion, one suggestion.

what do you feel would help you live a happier life? Is life stressful.

those with suicidal thoughts do need to reduce stress as much as possible in life.

what gets you through the day?

I wish I had some wise words. Please know we care how you feel and want to support you in feeling strong enough to keep going until you did naturally of old age. Life is so short and goes so fast.

Well the therapist adviced me to try and find some new friends (we were working on my problem with meeting new people). She told me to go to a bar for example and try to socialise. The problem is thats very VERY hard for me cuz of my introverted nature and my anxiety :x
I told her i will try and then proceeded to think about it 2 whole days and in the end i just couldn't do it. In the end i just told her all is good ;) and stoped going.

About the stress, well its pretty bad. At work its cranked to 100, my collegues are pretty old around 40-50 years old and they have a very different view of life. They just can't understand why i dont speak at all. I gaveup trying to explain to them my problems and tbh i think that will only make things worse
The only time im not stressed is when i play the guitar or im with certain friends.
There are exeptions with some of my new friends, my anxiety returns when im around them and its hard for me to go out with them (especially girls) cuz i just don't know what to talk with them, i start to panic when they ask me "why are not talking" or "why are you so quiet" and in the end i force myself to talk - 99% of the time they have no idea about the subject im talking and we are back to square one :D
Overall stress is very high in my day to day life.
 

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