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    Our forum members are people, maybe like yourself, who experience mental health difficulties or who have had them at some point in their life.

Hello. Recovering from PND

Y

YellowBrickRoad

Well-known member
Joined
Feb 2, 2010
Messages
81
Location
North wales.
Hello. My names Leanne, I live in north Wales with my daughter and my partner my 2 kittens Topcat and Benny and my puppy Murphy. When my daughter was 14 weeks old I was diagnosed with Post Natal Depression. I was prescribed something and began my road to recovery. A month later I began to feel a bit better but had some terrible side effects, dizzyness, sickness and blurred sight and speech. I told my Dr and asked for something else or some therapy instead. My Dr refused give me a repeat prescription and sent me on my merry way. I decided to give it another month but a few weeks later my blurred sight was so bad I fell down the stairs. Hurt and upset I refused to take any more of the tablets and decided to take vitamins and self help feeling betrayed by my Dr I didn't go back to her again. Months later when my daughter was roughly 8 months I realised I was kidding myself, I felt no better and I wasn't the only one who notice. My partner told me when I sat down and asked him if he had noticed anything that my behaviour had become unreasonable, erratic even. He had noticed I was having mood swings that would almost frighten him. I had become a different person, my skin had become pale, I had lost weight, I wasn't looking after myself or my appearance anymore I had become unloving and lost my sense of humour. At first I felt angry at him and myself but after a while I realised he was right. I was becoming a monster to live with and worse still I was ruining things for our daughter. How could I let myself get this way? :unsure:
Being told all this so frankly and openly I got worse. Then a few weeks ago just before Christmas I has a complete breakdown. I went into A&E where they referred me to a psychiatric nurse the next day. Over the next few days I had a lot of appointments and a lot people coming to see me. I was prescribed a new anti-depressant. Metazapine with a higher dosage and was referred to a counsellor who I met a few days ago. My health visitor was called who came round to discuss baby groups, parent support and housing support to get me out of the rubbish area and closer to my friends and family. As I have a family history of depression and suicide family have been very supportive especially as when I was 14 I tried to take my own life. :( Today I've taken a massive step and gone out the door to a baby club. This to me is my first and most important step to self helping myself recover. The beginning of my personal "yellow brick road" (hence the name). I know that Post Natal Depression along with other mental issues are very unspoken of and people are made to feel ashamed. No one ever talked about it to me when I was pregnant or when my girl was born. I felt guilty for feeling so low. I didn't have the easiest of labours and had a emergency c section after more than 30 hours of labour and my health visitor tells me this could be a factor.

I came on this website and I was hoping to share experiences with others with post natal depression or other depression. :) hope to meet some nice people. :grouphug:

Leanne x
 
A

Ainsworth

Guest
:welcome: Leanne

yep i had that as well with my first child, i was already depressed had been for years.
 
Y

YellowBrickRoad

Well-known member
Joined
Feb 2, 2010
Messages
81
Location
North wales.
Thankyou for your reply. Post natal depression has tore me apart. I wish it was more talked about. **Sigh*
 
rollinat

rollinat

Well-known member
Founding Member
Joined
Apr 24, 2008
Messages
1,816
:welcome: - I am glad you have found us. I had PND after my second child which went untreated and contributed in part to depression resurfacing. Well done in getting out to the baby club today - a big step, and I do hope you will be able to find new friends both there and here. Take care.
 
X

xxbeckyxx

Member
Joined
Dec 29, 2009
Messages
10
Location
berkshire
hay hun

I had pd with my first baby! I was young when i had her just turned 17 and just didn't relise how hard it was having a baby! Im now a mum to 5 and have never had it since.. my pd was awful i had to live back with my mum or my health visitor was gonna put me in a mother and baby assesment unit... i took meds for 6mths thought my mother in law was trying to kill me cause i was a crapp mum and take over my baby (i can laugh now ) But omg i was proper ill..

I fake that i was better and tryed to do everything perfect infront of family especially health perfessionals but my head was fuzzy and all i wanted was sleep!I had no idea what pd was and was just ashamed of myself.. it wasn't untill a few years later that most mums i spoke to had suffered similar and it is quite common..

You will get thru this hun and it will make you stronger and a brilliant mum takecare xx
 
greebobeebo

greebobeebo

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 3, 2009
Messages
1,027
Location
north norfolk
I had PND with my first son 12 years ago.

I also believe that I had anti natal depression, but didn't know it back then. All I can say is I am glad that I had the doctor I did. I realised myself that I had issues when I decided that walking to my local railway bridge, to jump off it was a good idea. Nobody in my family or my ex's family knows how deep I went.

All I know is that my son stopped me from harming myself.
 
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