- Sep 26, 2018
I have been diagnosed with: antisocial personality disorder , narcissistic personality disorder , paranoid PD , borderline PD and sadistic personality traits . I scored 31 on the PCL-R checklist and these diagnosis were made when I was remanded in a medium secure hospital in York . I was found to be involved in a conspiracy to murder but luckily I got screened by two forensic psychiatrists who decided i'd get the help and possible rehabilitation in a hospital setting rather than in a prison . My issue is eventhough I've had extensive and intensive hospital and community psych help I still struggle with thoughts about violence , odd sexual thoughts (sadism), feeling a sense of relating to serial killers and even becoming aroused by them and their acts . I know what is legally right and wrong so i'm not planning to act on any thoughts of fantasies I am on here to see if I can get a little help. Will I think like this forever? I'm 33 now.